


The Force That Brings Us Together

by AllyStorm, Bufftat_Junkie



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Dark Rey Appearance, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fix-It, Force Bond (Star Wars), Not Canon Compliant - Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Redeemed Ben Solo, Reylo - Freeform, Slow Burn, Space Mom Leia Organa, The Force, The Force Ships It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:41:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 56,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23157991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllyStorm/pseuds/AllyStorm, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bufftat_Junkie/pseuds/Bufftat_Junkie
Summary: Post-TLJ, Rey finds herself feeling alone on the Resistance Base on Ajan Kloss. Kylo Ren, still working for the first order, feels that same loneliness. When the Force connects them more than ever before, the two grow closer and closer. As Kylo Ren starts to help Rey in her journey to complete her training as a Jedi, feelings start to become more apparent. Will the two finally set aside their fears and come together, or will they be doomed to the loneliness they've felt their whole life?
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 39
Kudos: 89





	1. The Sudden Connection

Kylo Ren paced back and forth across the bridge of his personal star destroyer, Finalizer , in a short tempered near full blown rage over his first officer’s apparent lack of intelligence on the Rebellion’s current whereabouts. After the win/loss event of Crait nearly three months to the day, there had only been two reported sightings of the Falcon in completely different sectors of the outer rim. Almost as an afterthought, the view out the main viewports of the bridge was filled with the orbital shipyard platform of Kuat and the hulking masses of the slowly repairing Supremacy. After the Raddus had plowed through the ship it had taken weeks to tow it halfway across the galaxy for the beginning of its eventual repairs. 

The bond that held the girl to his mind now also tied to his heart; in secret the new supreme leader had tried to make contact with Rey through the force, but like hitting the web of a great Wyyyshockk spider of Kashyyyk, there was no fruitful attempt to contact Rey. All that met Ben Solo in the force was a deep coldness, like the space that hung between itself. 

Without Snoke in the way and Hux subdued like the mongrel he was, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren had been hard at work restructuring the First Order to have a proper military chain of command like the old republic of many years prior. Whether the leader of this new Empire was dead or alive, it would function like a well oiled machine. The effects of this new structure were only just being implemented on the smallest scale to start.

With Luke Skywalker gone and under General Leia Organa's watchful eye, Rey remained training on Ajan Kloss. The newfound rebellion was starting up, and as for now, Rey had nothing but time to study the scriptures of the text found in the Jedi Temple that had been burned to ash. And with each hour of training, of study, came more and more questions that filled the young scavenger's head. Where did she come from? And why did she have to be the one chosen to be so in tune with the Force?

It was almost second nature to Rey, using the Force. But what wasn't second nature to Rey, was thinking about a certain tall, dark-haired member of the dark side. A member who could be redeemed. The girl had thought of countless ways to persuade Ben back to the light side, or at least, away from the dark. She spent more time than she would like to admit thinking of him, not that she ever expressed her thoughts to any of her friends. Poe and Finn were working with the new fleet of rebels, occasionally checking in on Rey and going on missions with her to try find more answers. But the communication between the trio was dwindling, and Rey had never felt more alone. How strange it was, to feel alone on a planet full of people. Every little 'how are you' or 'good morning' was almost a taunt. She wasn't alright. It wasn't a good morning, as much as she wished it to be. The weight on Rey's shoulders was enormous, and it didn't seem to be lightening any time soon.

After a long day of training, Rey went to one of the campfires, getting herself something to eat before retreating back into her little hut where she cleaned herself up and got herself dressed for bed. If only it were that easy. Night after night, Rey would spend tossing and turning in bed, feeling almost a magnetic pull, but to what? On this particular night, Rey ventured out of her hut, bringing a blanket with her and wrapping it around her shoulders as she went into the depths of the forest, coming to a clearing. She pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs as she looked up at the trillions of stars in the sky. The silence of the night was calming, but also strangely eerie. That was, until she felt like she wasn't alone.

Unfortunately for Kylo Ren, restructuring an entire galaxy-wide military state was a lot harder than anyone might believe. Countless hours spent meditating or sitting through meetings on a process bogged down by the internal politics that had stalled the galactic senate before the days of the Empire. On top of everything else that worried the only child of Han Solo, his knights of Ren were sent into the unknown regions in search of a way through, but any updates were few and far between. 

While trying to recuperate in his personal chambers from another laborious meeting that stalled the reconstruction of a multitude of ships including the Supremacy, It seemed as though the hunt for the Rebellion had been put on hold for no other reason than to test the supreme leader’s patience, which rapidly dwindled day by day. Meditation through the force was his only option for peace in such a storm of anarchy, so he retreated to the blank room that had been set aside for true balance in color and even temperature. The cold tendrils of the broken connection still lingered at the edge, but there was an island of peace within the madness.

The feeling of being joined was fleeting. Rey sighed, closing her eyes for a moment as she hugged her knees to her chest under the blanket. She too, had been using the force to meditate. She found it essential to her training, because if she was not easily one with the force, how could she expect to use it to her advantage? Though as she meditated, the same pang of loneliness still echoed within her. A breeze passed through the forest, and Rey pulled the blanket tighter around her. With that cool breeze, came another wave of feeling joined once more. This time, Rey turned around, only to be faced with what was supposed to be her sworn enemy. The scavenger's blood ran cold, and she quickly jumped up from her spot on the ground.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, using as much control in her tone as she could muster. But the moment in which he had caught her was personal. Reflective, bringing to the surface what she would push down every day while on Ajan Kloss.

As Ben sat in that isolated chamber far from the other worries of the galaxy and secluded from even the most important message from the bridge of his ship, a soft breeze of humid air hit him. Without even opening one eye Ben knew what had happened. The voice of the Jakku native rattled his skull. With a calm expression and holding his place with legs crossed on the ground, Ben Solo met the frightened gaze of Rey. 

“The more important question is what are you doing here Rey? What brings you to seclusion from those you call friends, allies?” The fallen Jedi’s guard was still up and he knew what he saw was only what the girl allowed him or even wanted him to see. 

“I see it in your eyes.. The fear of loss but not of someone.. something.” The monotone voice felt icy to even Ben himself, his feelings betrayed his thoughts about the girl that couldn’t be hidden so easily. Just outside the Supreme leader’s quarters a frazzled General Hux prepared to deliver some poor news that’d undoubtedly would end without a reprimand. In the General’s head he would only wait for so long before barging in to disturb the usurper of the throne.

"I didn't _mean_ to be where you are....and I don't fear a loss of anything. You think you know me, Kylo, but you don't." Rey retorted with confidence. Though that confidence was merely surface-level, Rey knew the both of them knew he was at least close to the truth. It wasn't exactly a loss of something, but loss itself. The cold, welcoming aura of loss that tried its best to turn her to the dark side. But since childhood, Rey had known loss like an old friend. Or perhaps, an old enemy.

"No one's awake, I don't have anyone to be hiding from." she argued weakly, wrapping her arms around herself as another cool breeze passed. The lightweight nightgown that she wore was enough to keep her comfortable in the humid climate, but it did nothing to protect her from the cold. Whether that be the cold of temperature, or of emotion.

With the natural barrier Rey had formed many months ago to keep Kylo Ren out, it still stood strong enough to act as a mirror of emotions more than anything like the doorway into the woman’s thoughts. A cold breeze was felt within the controlled confines of the chamber and it became clear just how strongly they were connected in that moment, despite the long months since last it had happened. 

“That does not change your circumstance Rey, I know you hide from the First Order but there’s always something more. Whether it’s the truth, or something else you are always hiding or running. Except that day in the throne room. You had definitely come to me, for me.” The pressurized door behind Kylo Ren slid open and he turned around to see a disheveled Hux standing there, but the sudden interruption had been enough to shake away the connection, leaving the coldness behind that it always did.

“I will take these orders on the bridge. Go ahead of me and have the fleet course correct to Crait, I have some personal business to attend to that may just help us locate the Rebellion.” Ben Solo knew that for sure the saber he and Rey had split over Crait was most likely still in two pieces, so the young Force wielder had yet to train very effectively at all. 

With the pasty redhead in tow of the grandson of Vader, the feeling of contempt and seething hatred warmed the air around the young General. He obviously held a personal vendetta against the Supreme leader and his newest changes to the traditional order of things. Upon arriving on the bridge the lines of hyperspace already zipped by and the news given was that of a new ex imperial stronghold that held great weaponry from the old days of the Empire that would prove useful to the First Order’s military might.

With the connection severed thanks to General Hux, Rey found herself alone once more in the forests of Ajan Kloss. What the girl had noticed however, was that in those few short moments of being in contact with the new Supreme Leader, she didn't feel alone. Not emotionally or physically, she felt like she wasn't alone in the universe. And that was what scared her. The pull of the dark side was becoming more tempting with each connection.

With the two sides of light and dark constantly in conflict, Rey was at a loss. She was being pulled in two different directions with nowhere else to turn. Would she break in half? Or stay permanently to one side? She hoped for the ladder as she sat down once more on the forest floor, curling up and wrapping herself in the blanket. The wrapped blanket around her helped mimic a sense of security like it did when she was a young child.

Fear gripped at her heart, her insides feeling like she was at hyper speed. She ached and longed for the connection between her and Ben, but she knew that it would only lead to hurt. He would be able to see what she feared, what she desired, the thoughts that filled her head that she knew she shouldn't be thinking. She would disappoint her newfound friends, and let down an entire universe. This extreme spiraling that made Rey's heart pound and chest tight had only become more and more frequent with each night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	2. The Lady of the Lake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Force brings Rey and Ben together again, and they plan to fix the deceased Luke Skywalker's lightsaber.

Within another twelve hours the small fleet of Star Destroyers slipped back into real space just a couple kilometers from the obvious battle of Crait, if one could even call it that. Appearing on the bridge like a dark phantom, Kylo Ren’s voice was colder than his presence. 

“Prepare my shuttle. I will go down.. Alone.” The flowing of his cloak was all that answered the sudden departure of the dark Jedi. On the way to the hanger a dream from his last bout of sleep continued to bother him; it was the screams of the victims of Starkiller base. Ben Solo had not been the one to order it’s construction, it’s firing, nor had he even been on it when it fired, but he had let it happen nonetheless. A dark spot filled the distant orbit around Crait in the aftermath of the death of Snoke. It was said the same had happened above the forest moon of Endor and the possibility of such a thing scared the light and dark within Ben Solo. The old mine would hopefully hold the information he so desired and hoped to find.

The twelve hours that passed had been eventful for Rey. She got to talk with Poe and Finn again, thought that conversation was just small talk. They hadn't been on a mission for a while, and weren't looking to go on one any time soon while the new rebellion gathered up followers and materials. They had to stay safe as the leaders of the new wave, and Rey had to train. And train. And train some more. It left her exhausted after, but yet again, That feeling of longing and panic came back. The girl let out a sigh before opening her eyes once more.

Rey ventured out into the forest again, though this time, she found herself come across a small pond, with water that looked crystal clear. Setting down her blanket and taking off her shoes, Rey waded into the pond, letting the water cool her off after a long day. The scavenger let her hair down and closed her eyes as she let herself become completely submerged for a few moments before breaking the surface again, her dampened locks now darker. The girl let out a small sigh before opening her eyes once more.

As he landed the large shuttle about twenty five meters away from the blasted hole in the heavy durasteel door and the lone man walked out onto the cratered surface, now freshly dusted by salt. Ben walked from the entrance up to the overseeing command center to find the same old data screens displaying their last commands... 

“Flee from the First Order. Hide.” It was a noble gesture but one that hadn’t helped everyone, which was something Ben particularly felt ashamed for. 

“Why did you hide?” The young Solo spoke out loud to the empty and rather dusty room. If the Rebellion at the time actually had supporters then why had nobody come to aid their allies. This question had been a bother for many sleepless nights, with no obvious answer. As his boots left blood red prints in the absence of salt all the way to the entrance, a sound and feeling of the vacuum of space filled Ben’s ears. With his eyes closed as not to go any farther than connected thoughts Ben Solo spoke aloud. 

“Why? Why two whole months with nothing but the cold and now I cannot avoid this encounter?” He had spoken to Rey, as their connection in the force opened back up, leaving the dark Jedi feeling vulnerable and looking physically tense. The sounds of water and the scent of nature filled his nose like the annoyance it was.

Rey jumped in surprise, the water splashing around her. "I don't know, have you been thinking about me? Perhaps that's the problem?" she spoke just as tensely as him as she stood up once more, the water now at her waist. She crossed her arms in annoyance, hoping that her stance would distract from how foolish she probably looked.

Though, it did start to annoy her that she couldn't even go a simple five minutes without the thought of Ben Solo popping into her head, or appearing right before her. Though she couldn't see exactly where he was, she could tell it was dark. Dark, and cold. Why did everything with Ben always have to be dark and cold? Why couldn't he just come into the light and join her? That would make her feel less guilty and fearful of her growing attraction.

Ben finally opened his eyes and turned to see Rey drenched in water with ripples bouncing from her middle. The water had made the color of her hair darker but not so dark it looked unrecognizable. The light robes clung tightly to her body with the moisture and Ben had to look away before he saw anything else.

“I would rather this not happen right now.” Ben’s tone was calm and monotonous as ever, but it tweaked at the end of his speaking in a way that revealed his nerves. With his back to the Jakku native he continued with a hidden blush.

“I wished to talk to you about that lightsaber... Clearly this was a bad time for this to happen. So just close your eyes and maybe think of something else?” The nervousness of Ben perfectly reflected the reaction Rey had given him upon being found shirtless once before. Seemingly the force worked in cruel ways, because Ben Solo was suddenly thankful he had come to this place alone. Trying to keep everything on track more or less the dark Jedi spoke up again.

“You still have that lightsaber with you, but it is useless now without the proper tools to repair it...” without seeing Rey it was easier to focus already, but even that was rapidly fading. Ben felt the warmth of her mind from their connection but he would never dare to admit just how welcoming it was.

Rey rolled her eyes as the dark Jedi turned his back to her. But the more she thought about it, the more odd it seemed. Was this enough to phase him? But as soon as he mentioned the lightsaber, her focus was back. "I'm good at fixing things. Though I'm a bit surprised. Why do you care?" Rey dared to ask in a matter-of-fact tone as she took a few steps forward, closer to him.

It was intoxicating, the connection between them. And the closer she got to Ben, the more the unwelcoming and lonely aura that followed her seemed to fade. If only she could get him to look at her. The shadows that surrounded him made her want that even more...if only she could really see him, even for a few seconds. 

"Ben, please answer me." she sighed.

With his back still turned to Rey the muscles along Ben’s upper body flexed and relaxed with each deep breath he used to try and steady himself. He had to look at her, to find a face for the soft voice that secretly haunted his dreams as well as his mind while awake. Ben turned to face Rey again with a stout silence born of guilt and for the briefest moment of nervousness. The cloud that engulfed Rey now had barely shone the pool of water around her, the barrier in her mind making the slightest assessment of her surroundings improbable. Ben’s focus had become crystal clear that it was on her face and that alone as anything else might cause a stirring in his heart or mind that could be felt through the force. Rey was beautiful enough as she was, but now with nothing left to do the son of Solo answered Rey’s question. 

“I care because it has become clear to me just how wrong I was. That saber does not belong to me... but it feels wrong to allow it to sit broken.” Ben wanted to add how the saber was broken just like him but his pride did not permit such an admittance of weakness. “You need a teacher Rey. I can see the desire for knowledge in your eyes as clear as I can see you now.” A glow like gentle sunlight seemed to accompany the Jakku native but it’s warmth never reached the cold numbness of Ben Solo’s face.

The moment Ben turned around, the feeling of warmth was back, coursing through her veins. But with that warmth came a bit of embarrassment. Only then, did she realize she was in a similar situation as months ago when he had appeared in front of her shirtless. The nightgown clung to her body like a second skin, and Rey understandably felt herself grow shy under his gaze. The wind blew in her direction and she shivered, stepping out of the water and wrapping the blanket around her body.

"Are you trying to teach me how to fix a broken saber, or how to join the dark side?" she asked as the pink in her cheeks faded, feeling more comfortable under the barrier of the blanket. Rey hated feeling vulnerable, whether that be physically or mentally. The walls that had built up over years and years of being alone on Jakku were slowly crumbling, and Rey tried her damnedest to build them back up again. 

"Look, I'm not looking to join the dark side, my opinion hasn't changed. But I don't want to destroy the lightsaber beyond repair thanks to my inexperience." she admitted. "Are you sure you know how to fix it?"

Within the subconscious of his mind Ben made a mental note of the almost comical turn around of circumstances regarding Rey’s modesty, but still Ben’s gaze did not leave her face except for her hair that was noticeably getting longer. Now with her body modestly covered his gaze wandered to her hands; the woman’s small frame perfectly fit the look of a scavenger, but her hands holding the edges of the towel reminded him of the physical boundary they broke before the confrontation above Crait. Ben dismissively chuckled and shook his head, for the dark side of the force was already proving itself a failure to the powerful grandson of Vader. 

“No.. The dark side holds nothing worth hurting for and I see that now, but the power that was gained can not be so easily disregarded. I once thought that lightsaber as nothing more than an heirloom of my lineage to Vader, but it currently stands as evidence that I am not worthy of wielding something I broke so easily.” He took a deep breath that shook his core as he had just admitted to being unfit of the shadow of Vader. With nothing left to say the dark Jedi took a step closer to her, to Rey, the scar from their first encounter still visibly arching up his face. 

“To meet you now would mean your destruction, that would be unavoidable and quite regrettable. Travel to Coruscant in the core worlds by the guidance of the force. You will find what you seek there.” Ben Solo took a short step closer and he could feel the humidity around his face, his arm extending towards Rey as if of its own accord.

Rey looked over the broken dark Jedi's face, her eyes scanning over his features. As he stepped closer, a shiver ran down her spine. She wasn't sure if it was from his presence, or from the cold, but all she knew was that her breath hitched as he stepped closer and he held out his arm. Her dark brown eyes flickered from his face down to his gloved hand, almost gazing longingly at it. Taking a shaky breath of her own she reached out with one hand, gingerly taking his wrist. With the other, she carefully removed his glove before taking his hand, still holding on to his glove.

"And what if I requested guidance?" she asked, her tone considerably more soft than it had been previously, affected by his touch.

The attention from Rey was astoundingly effective at holding Ben in place, his own focus becoming tunnel visioned on their very real and very physical interaction across worlds. Ben’s breath was quietly shaky now as he could feel the light touch of the scavenger on his hand and his eyes darted between her delicate fingers, the wet locks of hair that clung to her neck, and her brown eyes. Ben was entranced by the woman he once desired to corrupt or destroy. As his hand touched hers and Ben could feel the softness of her touch, he let out a breath that was unknowingly held. Ben Solo felt as foolish as anyone could have ever been when his hazel eyes locked onto her brown ones. 

“Then you only need to ask nicely.” Goosebumps spread up his arm and covered his torso as Rey held onto him, further cementing just how real all of this was.

"Please, Ben?" Rey asked, the fear in her eyes only growing as she confessed her need for help. Her want for him to help her. "I'll go. By myself, no one else. But I need help. Do you...think you could meet me? No trying to turn the other, or bringing any back up, just...fix the saber?" she suggested. Her heart beat rapidly in her chest, the silence around them only adding to the anxiety stirring in her. She had said too much...revealed too much. 

"Never mind...I'll go down there myself...I'll let you know if I need help with whatever this...connection we have and I'll fix it. You won't need to worry anymore." she said quickly, letting go of his hand.

The sheer desperation Rey showed him was enough to seduce most Jedi to the darkness on their own, but still she was as strong as ever. Ben stayed silent for a moment, letting the silence represent him as Rey let go of his hand. The weakness the Jakku native had shown was enough to allow Ben to glimpse into her mind, but all he saw was confusion and loss before pulling away.

“You know how to find me Rey, but I believe you already know what to do. Now go before I change my mind.” With the push of the force Kylo Ren blew the towel off of Rey’s shoulders, knocked her back a few inches, and broke the connection. The pull of the dark tempted him with such an opportunity to end the Rebellion as Snoke himself had once instructed, but Kylo had different plans as he headed for the bridge command. The supreme leader only wore one glove as he walked with purpose towards the navigation crew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	3. The Meeting on Coruscant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben surprises Rey on Coruscant where he helps her get a holocron for her lightsaber.

Rey managed to convince Leia that it was alright for her to travel to Coruscant alone, but only under the agreement that BB-8 would travel with her. Luckily, Rey was planning on leaving the droid on the Millennium Falcon while she ventured off to fix the saber. The journey was fairly effortless, at least for the ship. The journey for Rey was nerve-wracking as she paced the ship with Ben's glove in her hand.

As the ship landed, Rey put the glove in one of her many pockets, instructing BB-8 to stay and 'guard' the ship. The naive and well-meaning droid followed her instruction, and Rey made her way to the core of Coruscant. She kept her head down as she moved through the crowds of civilians, the saber hidden in her bag, her staff in her hand. Soon enough, the Jakku native made it to the core worlds, stopping before she would enter. The girl was terrified. She had no clue what she was doing.

Ben Solo would follow his own path forward no matter how it would disregard what Rey or even his mongrel general Hux had said. Ben took his command shuttle and flew to Coruscant in full knowledge of how recognizable the dark ship was. 

Making his way to the core worlds was easier done than said for being the supreme leader. Upon arrival to the city planet the Jedi temple turned Imperial palace was unmistakable from the air. Tattered banners of the Imperial cog still hung from the structure’s exterior walls as a sign of what had happened all those years ago. Kylo Ren’s command shuttle was parked in the open a few hundred meters before the great staircase that led up into the massive temple. Ben reached out to show a glimpse of the location to Rey, no matter where she was

The magnetic pull that the bond provided grew stronger, and for a split second, Rey could see where the Jedi temple was. Was this Ben being helpful? Or was this him luring her somewhere she shouldn't be? In the end, the brunette decided that no matter where the Supreme Leader led her, she could take care of herself. She had been for more than a decade now, so why would that change?

She managed to make her way to the staircase. Normally, an imperial ship would tip her off, but Rey had only one thing in mind. Fixing the saber. She climbed the many stairs that led to the temple. There was no turning back now. She opened the door of the temple and slipped inside.

Ben knew how such an encounter with local security would be if Rey was found walking the temple grounds, so to see her enter within the massive temple’s walls immediately was a bit of a comfort. Using the force the fallen Jedi reached out and activated a series of lights leading to a vault that sat within a grand and clearly ancient library. Almost like knowing the results of her actions before she made them, Ben hurried ahead of Rey in the darkness as not to be spotted by the scavenger. 

Where once a large set of long tables filled a great space between data and bookshelves was now many display shelves filled with the lightsabers of what could only be fallen Jedi of the past. Upon noticing her stop to look like anyone naturally would Ben spoke softly through the force. 

“The vault.." at one end of the expansive library sat a force lock sealed vault

The inside of the temple was dark and foreign to the scavenger. She was about to try and find some sort of lighting system when a series of lights began to light up in a path that would seemingly lead Rey to where she was to go in order to fix the saber. Warily continuing forward and stopping to look around the massive and mysterious structure, Rey ventured into a certain room that got her heart beating faster.

There were rows and rows of display cases of sabers. Did they hold sabers of the fallen Jedi, or just those who had been deemed worthy enough to put on display? Rey had no clue as she continued to examine the displays. That is, until the unmistakable voice of Ben Solo echoed in her head.

She turned to look at the end of the room, where the vault was. It was encrusted with gold and ancient scripture. The young rebel stepped closer and closer to the vault until she was right in front of it. Rey swore she could see a shadow move, but merely shrugged it off as her imagination getting the best of her. 

"Now what?" Rey responded to the voice.

A bird knocked a stone bust of a long forgotten Jedi from its pedestal as it climbed through the air to the ruins above. This sudden interruption had even started Ben but he didn’t dare make a sound just yet. Using the most gentle touch of the force Ben gave the impression of his hand on Rey’s shoulder, even though he was much farther from the brunette than just within arms reach. 

“Steady.. reach out and feel the locks of the door. Tell them to relax and the door will open as you wish and will it too.” Not that he would ever admit it but Ben had a deep rooted respect for the part of Palpatine that left whole wings of the temple untouched, and just how little of it he converted into a palace. The only reason Ben knew what they were doing was because of stories he had read or been told by Snoke or Luke many years prior.

The stone bust that fell to the ground caused Rey to jump, the startling sound making her aware of how quiet the library of sabers was. When she felt a hand on her shoulder, she immediately whirled around to see no one there. Taking a deep breath, Rey listened to Ben's voice and turned back to the vault, reaching out and feeling the locks. Getting them to relax took quite a while, many times having Rey mumbling about 'how the hell do you get a lock to relax?' But eventually, the locks clicked and Rey was able to open the vault, her grip on her staff tightening as she prepared herself for whatever could be inside.

Watching Rey jump at some literal shadows was slightly amusing but Ben had to really make an effort not to laugh as she murmured about the seemingly ludicrous advice. The large aperture vault door twisted open to reveal a short hallway before the vault laid ahead with a glittering blue and red series of lights. 

”Calm yourself, I’m coming down.” Ben jumped down from the open second floor and landed quietly just outside the door with a stoic expression on his scarred face. “It’s been awhile Rey.”

Rey was intrigued by the small hallway that was lit up with small lights. But what really confused the brunette was when Ben told her to calm herself. She reacted quickly to the shadowy figure jumping down by promptly hitting it with her staff before she realized just who was right in front of her. This wasn't just their connection...he was really here. 

"...I did not mean to hit you." Rey said apologetically, "You can't just jump in front of someone and expect them not to react!"

Ben really should have expected what would come next as Rey whacked him with her scavenged bow staff, but here he was laying on the ground holding his head and rubbing what he believed to be a bruised rib. Grunting in pain as he shuffled to his feet, Ben continued to hold his side as his breathing was labored, he scowled at the scavenger girl in anger before dramatically pointing towards the open vault. 

“In there is..” a coughing fit erupted where words should have been. “A bank of Sith and Jedi holocrons regarding thousands of legends and teachings of either side. Call the holocron on the building of a Jedi’s weapon to you..” 

Ben had to lean against the wall for support, spitting onto the ages old dusty floor. “The holocron will reveal itself and you will retrieve it.” Ben erupted into another coughing fit that was a tad worse than the first, anger creeping into his dark colored eyes.

Rey couldn't help but be concerned for the dark Jedi, completely disregarding his instructions in that moment and carefully approaching him. 

"Are you alright?" she asked in a gentle tone. He clearly wasn't here to hurt her, at least not yet, and Rey couldn't just not address how she had just injured him. 

"Where did I hit you?" The girl's brown eyes were filled with concern, as much as if it had been Poe or Finn or Leia that had been injured. It was strange, how comfortable yet uncomfortable at the same time this bond had made her around Ben.

It was _almost_ laughable when Rey asked if he was alright as he was doubled over in pain. Ben carefully stabilized himself with the force to lower the pain but it still felt like his side and abdomen were on fire. 

“My side, that was a pretty good hit. I think you may have bruised or broken something.” Mostly leaning against the wall, Ben reached out to Rey with one arm. “Help me walk in there with you, it’s the least you can do to repay me for that.” The silent vault still laid ahead with centuries of knowledge once locked away.

The girl nodded in agreement, taking his arm and draping it over her shoulders. It was...nice having him so close. For someone who came off as cold, he was considerably warm. 

"I'm sorry... it's a habit. I've chipped one of Poe's teeth for sneaking up on me during training." she remarked as she carefully led the Supreme Leader into the vault, walking down the dimly-lit, narrow hallway.

They made it down the hallway and into the inside of the vault, the banks of holocrons right in front of the both of them. 

"Here...take this while I deal with the saber." Rey said, hesitating a bit before she handed Ben her staff to put some of his weight on. She dug around in the bag on her shoulder, taking out the broken saber and stepping forward. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, Rey used the force to call out to a holocron from the Jedi bank of holocrons.

Ben almost chuckled at the thought of her knocking her friend in the mouth just because she was easily startled. “I’m sure he remembers just as good as I will not to sneak up on you.” Ben used the very staff that injured him for support as Rey channeled her focus to find the right holocron. 

“Once you’ve found it.. reach out and it will guide you to it.” Ben knew all about the process thanks to the teachings of Snoke, otherwise he would use the now no longer intact catalogue of the Jedi temple archives. A singular blue holocron lit up just a few feet to the left of Rey’s hand, a low hum emanating from the artifact.

Rey opened her eyes, her face lighting up with excitement as the blue holocron lit up. She thought this was going to be harder for her, but then again, Rey was known to not give herself enough credit. Reaching out, Rey grabbed the holocron, and carefully inserted it into the saber. With a flick of her wrist, Rey activated the saber. It was as good as new. She deactivated the saber just as quickly and turned to look at Ben.

"Thank you..." she said genuinely. "I appreciate your help."

Looking up to see what Rey had done Ben found himself chuckling through the pain of his injury, shaking his head at the rookie mistake made by the scavenger. 

“You’re welcome for the help but we’re not done yet. Let’s get out to my shuttle and I can show you the rest.” 

Without another word or glance Ben Solo started towards the front of the temple, and from there his shuttle not much farther away. With every painful step forward Ben began wheezing as he breathed, clearly this activity only aggravated his injury. 

“Oh, and don’t activate that lightsaber again until I say so.” While it seemingly was stabilized Ben knew a thing more than the brunette woman believed, so a short remedy to beginners knowledge couldn’t hurt more than an ego.

Rey followed after Ben, a proud smile on her face. That smile would dwindle though every time Ben showed any sign of pain from the injury she had given him. Putting the saber in her bag, Rey thought about her options. She could heal him with the force. She'd done so before with other creatures she'd come across in the galaxy. But the question was, if he'd trust her enough to let her. 

"What do you mean by 'show me the rest'?" The scavenger asked curiously. "I thought that was it? The saber's fixed, isn't it?"

Now only a painful twenty meters and one large staircase away from the ominous black shuttle Ben had to hold back the urge to explain himself or chuckle just so he had the strength to continue to his ship.

“On first glance yes, but a lightsaber is easily mistaken for a simple weapon when in fact it is one of the most complex tools one can wield.” He had that sort of uncomfortable look on his face as he used most of his strength just to suppress the pain, but inside Ben was groaning in pain like a child who had scraped his knee.

"When we get to your ship, we're doing something about that rib of yours before anything else." Rey replied with a raised brow, "You won't be able to help much when you can hardly breathe. I can help, you'll be good as new." she promised as she walked down with him and down the staircase, being extra wary of the man beside her in case he would fall. It was odd, how simply finding a droid had led her here. Had she not found BB-8, she was certain she wouldn't be there on Coruscant at that moment.

Ben Solo nodded to acknowledge the statement Rey made, as his energy was focused on walking. Being this close to her for this long might normally drive the dark Jedi crazy, especially considering how their last encounter went over, but with his current injuries and word to help rebuild the saber of his grandfather the circumstances were far different than they might normally be. The ship automatically recognized Kylo and the ramp lowered for the two to enter with the hiss of quick depressurization. 

“Ladies first.” Solo croaked out with a grimace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is appreciated! Feel free to leave a comment or Kudos!


	4. Force Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey make it back to Ben's ship and Rey attempts to use the Force to heal Ben.

Rey made her way onto the ship, looking back every few seconds to make sure Ben hadn't fallen over or injured himself any further. When she made it into the ship, she couldn't help but eye around it. She found most all spacecrafts interesting, and she'd never been on a ship like this one.

"Come on and sit down so I can take a look at wherever I hit you...again, I'm so sorry." the brunette instructed as Ben made his way onto the ship behind her.

Ben hobbled like the broken man he felt like up into the ship and hit the panel to close the ramp once he reached the top, it caused the interior lights to come on as he collapsed into a chair and dropped the staff, nearly gasping for air.

“You.. come to me.” Ben reached to hold his side again and only then did he realize he had been bleeding the whole time. A realization crashed through his thoughts as it could easily be that the blaster wound from Chewbacca back on StarKiller had reopened somehow.

“Just be careful, I'm injured, not weak.” As though to capitalize on the statement a medpack flew off the wall and came to skidding halt on the floor between them.

Rey looked down at the med pack, but didn't pick it up. She knew what she was doing. "Ben, you're going to have to trust me on this, okay?" She said as she helped him get his shirt off. Much like when they connected under similar circumstances, the scavenger's cheeks flushed pink.

Quickly waving away any thoughts that accompanied that blush, Rey put her hand over the wound and closed her eyes, using the force to heal him. The wound slowly stitched itself back together, and Rey did her best to keep her focus. She'd never used her healing on another human before, so it took quite a bit of energy out of her.

Ben gave a hurt look to the young Jedi as he wondered what she could have possibly meant from this. His hand found his lightsaber at his belt, but only rested on the hilt out of an endangered curiosity, his anxiousness grew by the moment.

“Fine... but one false move and I'l- '' Ben began coughing again as another fit wracked his body and drained his energy. The blush went completely unnoticed where the pressure on his wound was not. As he had expected the scar tissue from the Wookiee bolt-caster had been torn open and a rib had been broken.

“Just... b-be careful.” The pain rapidly subsided but spiked as the rib took its original place. “Agh, what?!” Ben watched as the wound completely healed, but it had left lesser vision of the blaster wound than before.

Watching Rey nearly collapse post act suddenly worried the Solo, but as he tried to reach for help, he came to the realization his energy had not returned with the healing of his wounds. “Rey.. Stay with me.” Ben sat up and placed a hand on her shoulder as he looked into the distant eyes, his mind was split between her condition and how she acted upon him.

Due to her own lack of rest and overworking herself in training over the past few weeks, Rey was absolutely exhausted before attempting to heal Ben. But now that she had transferred what little energy she had left over to him, it was hard keeping her eyes open.

"I'm okay...just haven't healed another human before...only animals and plants." she mumbled, attempting to sit up. "Did it at least work? Are you feeling alright?"

The color in her face had been drained, now a pale white dotted with faint freckles across her nose and cheeks and her head was pounding like it did back on Jakku when she would run out of water for a while. But the only thing important to her in that moment was if her efforts had succeeded or not.

Ben was quite obviously astounded to hear that anyone, especially a force user of so little training such as Rey could possibly do such anything like healing another person. Ben looked into Rey’s eyes with nothing but concern for the woman as his previous anxieties had been forgotten like sand in the wind.

“Yeah- Uh yes, Im feeling better, but what you need is a bacta bath or a long nap.” Ben sat up and forced the bow staff to him for help in standing, also reaching out to pull out a cot of sorts for sleeping on. “Where should I send the ship?” The Solo asked as he managed to stand after such an ordeal. Ben knew well enough that if they stayed on the planet that surely they would be spotted so leaving was his next best move.

“Galaxies, you look like you’ve been shot, just please try to get some rest.” Ben Solo was ready to move to the cockpit on the word of the scavenger, which was a new and alien concept to him.

"Yavin 4...no one goes there anymore." Rey replied as she got onto the cot and lied down, pulling her knees up to her chest. It was a rather odd way of sleeping, so curled up like that, but it was the only way Rey knew how to sleep. It made her feel oddly safe and secure. Back on Jakku, her own home was quite small, along with her bed. Sleeping like this was the only way for her to be comfortable, and since then, that was the only way she slept. "Thank you, Ben." were the last words the young Jedi uttered before she fell fast asleep.

Ben acknowledged the tired woman with a nod but his expression remained emotionless as he turned to limp into the cockpit. Just before closing the door separating the fore and aft of the ship, Rey’s kind words of gratitude planted a hidden seed within the man’s heart, one that he would not even fully understand until much later. The dark Jedi turned back and hit the correct series of buttons on the interior panel to raise the ramp and close the door to separate the two halves of the ship. With little energy from the day’s ordeals the older of the two plotted a near direct course for the outer rim and the Yavin system. With it’s two guiding blade-like wings the shuttle took off for space with now two dozing Force users aboard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	5. Rey's Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey has a nightmare featuring Ben....and another version of herself.

_ Rey awoke to see Ben sitting in the cockpit, piloting the ship. For whatever reason, she couldn’t seem to make out the readings on the screen, but that didn’t matter. “How are you feeling?” the young Jedi asked, causing the Supreme Leader to turn to look at her. "Better. And you?" He simply responded as he got up from his seat and took a step towards her. _

_ "Better..." Rey responded, her breath catching in her throat as Ben continued to step closer, backing her up into a corner. "Are you sure?" Ben murmured as he reached up and gently took her chin into his hand, tilting her head up to look at him. Rey's heart rate sped up, "Yes, I'm sure," she managed to whisper. The dark Jedi smirked down at her, "Think I could make you feel even better?" _

_ All Rey could do was nod before Ben pressed his lips against hers, initiating the passionate kiss. It took a moment for Rey to reciprocate, but she did nonetheless. Ben continued to kiss her as he lifted her and she wrapped her legs around his waist. _

_ Getting lost in his touch, Rey didn't even acknowledge the dark chuckle that escaped her lips. With a flash of blue light, Ben froze. "What's wro-" Rey was about to ask before she looked down at her own hand to see the lightsaber activated in her hand, impaling Ben. He collapsed to the ground, and panic began to set in. "Ben? No, no, Ben, please don't do this..." Rey rambled as a pool of blood began to form around his body. _

_ "He was fun, wasn't he?" A familiar voice piped up from behind her. _

_ Rey turned around, tears streaming down her face to see none other than...herself. Paler, with red eyes and dressed in all black. "Awh...Poor little Rey...all alone again." the darker counterpart taunted as she stepped closer. "You thought he liked you, didn't you? You thought you could bring him back? And look at what you've done now, just made a mess..." _

_ "I-I didn't mean to do anything! Help me!" Rey pleaded to the other, but all Dark Rey did was laugh. _

**_"Sweetheart, I am you....and I know you'll be me soon enough."_ **

Rey woke up in a cold sweat, breathing heavily as she tried to keep herself calm. She was spiraling again. Her heart pounded and she felt like she could hardly breathe as tears flowed freely down her face. She didn’t mean to hurt him...she didn’t want to hurt him. Was that what she was destined to become?

As Rey awoke with a start, crying and sweaty still, Ben was relieved to have finally woken her. Ben was on his knees next to her cot on the shuttle as it continued it’s trek through hyperspace. 

“Rey? You’re going to be okay, I’m here, I just need to know what’s happening. You shouted my name and started yelling nonsense and crying.” The dark haired man looked genuinely worried for the woman he had legitimately tried to kill once, but that had passed and the supreme leader was not even sure where he stood in terms of his own allegiance. Rey was this grey figure in the scheme of things that seemed to draw him in no matter what happened. 

“I have some water here, sit up and drink.” Ben held the canteen in obvious view of the woman’s eyes as he struggled to find answers from within.

Rey took a shaky breath as she sat up and took the canteen, taking a sip of the water. "I'm sorry....it happens sometimes, it's why I don't like to sleep." she finally mumbled, reaching up and wiping her eyes as she continued to take deep breaths. 

The worry in Ben's eyes...it made her even more scared. Did he really care? Or was she showing him a weakness in her that could eventually lead to her demise? She took another sip of water, her hands still shaking as she tried to keep them steady. The woman knew that hate would only lead to anger, as Luke had taught her, but she knew she could never truly hate Ben. She just hated how he made her vulnerable.

Ben felt somewhat responsible for whatever reason Rey felt this way, but it didn’t make a bit of sense. “No Rey, it’s okay. Here, drink a little more.” Ben took the canteen in hand and tipped it to her lips slowly. “I know you’re afraid, Rey, but I can help you get some more rest.” Ben Solo hated how easy it was to be so soft and vulnerable just because he was near her, but now she really needed his help. 

“Do you trust me?” It was a horrible question to ask with their past to consider, but Rey looked close to death from lack of sleep and energy, it was astounding she was able to stay sitting up for so long.

At first, Rey wanted to refuse. She wanted to just write this off as a nightmare and take care of herself like she always did when she was alone in her hut back on Ajan Kloss. But when she looked at him, she couldn't detect any ill intent whatsoever. Rey didn't see him trying to be Kylo Ren, she saw him just being Ben. That put her slightly at ease as she nodded slowly, "...I trust you." she acknowledged, curious as to what he was going to do in order to help her.

Ben saw a bit of the fear fade from the scavengers eyes and Rey’s own words were enough to stir something within him. “Okay, when you wake we should be on Yavin. Just relax for me.” Ben removed his glove and placed the bare hand on the woman’s head, fingers spread slightly as he channeled the force. “Do not worry, trust in the force..” Rey would black out immediately as Ben pulled the same move he did on Takodanna all that time ago, it felt like ages since then. With Rey asleep in a trance that would not be disturbed by dreams or even most things from the outside, Ben retook his place in the cockpit to finish the journey. 


	6. Pushed Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben fix Luke's saber. As the two grow closer, fear rises and leads to hurt.

Rey would wake up on a much softer cot in a room filled with old medical equipment, the sun pouring in through a window slit on the far wall. The smell of a forest surrounded this strange stone place and the sounds of birds could be heard from inside. Outside on the slightly overgrown landing zone sat the shuttle that had brought them there. Ben had been going over all the old equipment left by the rebellion around twenty years prior, room by room. Ben Solo made sure to have the medical wing up and running first.

Rey awoke and sat up in the medical wing, rubbing her eyes and blinking as she adjusted to the sunlight. She stood up and looked around the wing, impressed by the upkeep. She didn't know if she should go looking for Ben after what had happened...she was understandably embarrassed by the situation. Still having nightmares that kept her from sleeping at night or waking her in an extreme panic. Finding a place where she could freshen up, Rey cleaned up a bit, fixing her hair and calming herself before she would go to he cockpit to check on Ben.

When she was done, Rey stepped out of the medical wing, walking down the corridors until she found the cockpit and quietly knocked on the wall as if she were knowing on a door before speaking up,

"How are you feeling?" was the first thing the girl said before a feeling of déjà vu swept over her.

Ben had been sitting on the floor with his legs crossed and a large mess of tools around him when Rey finally approached him, in the center of all the tools sat a small workbench which held the lightsaber, holocron, and a number of strange tools lined up by increasing length. 

“I’m good. Some sleep and hard work have done me well. The fallen Jedi continued to rummage through his tools, picking one out every few he set aside. “Join me.. I will need your help to do this, it’s not my lightsaber after all.” Ben Solo was greatly attuned with the force in the moment and he sensed the strange unease from the scavenger. He only made eye contact calmly as he waited.

She nodded, sitting down on the ground with him as she looked at all the different types of tools. Rey had seen many in her time, but some of the tools on the floor were unrecognizable to her. 

"So, how exactly does one fix a lightsaber?" Rey asked flat-out. There was no need to beat around the bush, after all, that's what the both of them agreed to do when they planned on meeting. Nothing else and nothing more (as Rey had to constantly tell herself). "Is there a manual or handbook? I'd highly doubt it, but it doesn't hurt to ask."

Ben waited patiently for Rey to become comfortable as a silence fell between them. As Rey asked the question, Ben already had an answer, even if the question was a little far out there. 

“For over a thousand generations the Jedi and the Sith built lightsabers with the force. Guiding themselves to build what was meant for them to keep the peace... or pursue the darkness.” Being careful with a small set of multifaceted pliers, Ben pulled the focusing kyber crystal from the bottom half of the broken hilt. “This is the crystal my grandfather found when he was only a boy in the Jedi Order.”

He handed Rey the jagged rock and moved with a small and very precise torch to cut away the metal from the center of the break, moving quickly afterwards to add a new small collar like component. 

“Place the kyber crystal back in it’s housing if you will.” Ben turned a small knob that extended a few tiny claws from within the hilt.”

Rey followed Ben's instruction, placing the kyber crystal into the hilt. It was a perfect fit. Rey cracked a small smile, feeling herself actually enjoying Ben's help and company. If only she could convince him that he would be at home and safe on the side of the Resistance, they could be like this all the time. Become friends...maybe more. And maybe Rey would finally stop having nightmares about her alternate path that she feared to go down. 

"Now what?" she asked, looking back over at Ben for the next instruction.

Ben watched closely as Rey did exactly as he instructed, her movements obviously careful as the hilt automatically drew the crystal into itself. The son of Solo felt in tune with Rey and it felt kind of nice to legitimately get along with someone since his childhood alongside Chewbacca and Leia. 

“Install a new conductor, this keeps the raw energy from the power cell through the crystal from converting the hilt into a small but powerful bomb in your hands.” With his own hands on his knees, Ben used the force to bring the two semi circular halves before the scavengers eyes, his own expression was one of focus.

Rey nodded as she began that process. It was easy for her at least to install a new conductor, but what was difficult was to not comment as she did so. 

"You look so unhappy, maybe the process will go faster if you smile a bit. Make the lightsaber feel welcome." the scavenger joked. She expected him to roll his eyes or just completely ignore her remark, but she was having some fun with it. It was a bit like bantering with Finn, or Poe. Just with a much more serious and powerful figure sitting next to her. Ben admittedly enjoyed the humor but a darker burden held his tongue, kept him sober of the happiness that Rey kept with her at all times. 

“Now will the lightsaber to come together. You are strong in the force Rey, now prove it to yourself.” He wanted to see the day that the lonely scavenger saw her true potential; that which Snoke once alluded to in his own wisdom. Ben watched closely to see if Rey was capable of what he hoped to see, this was more a test than any she had knowingly gone through before.

Rey looked at Ben for a few moments, a pang of nervousness in her stomach at his request. Prove it to herself? Had she not proved it to herself before? Sure, she did have constant doubts, a bit of fear thrown into the mix, but she assumed that's how everyone felt going through life. The Force didn't seem like some big test to her anymore...it was just another way of life. Nonetheless, Rey nodded, her gaze now turning to the parts of the saber. Taking a breath and clearing her mind, Rey began to will the saber to come together. This task was much more difficult than she had imagined it would be, but she continued on, clenching her fist at her side while she repeated to herself in her head to keep going.

With careful focus and a watchful gaze Ben studied how Rey attuned herself with the force, he saw her balled up fist and somewhat hesitantly reached across the workbench to place a hand on her shoulder. 

“Your anger makes you powerful, as does your frustrations but those do not help here. Envision the living force, will the very matter of the metal to join.” Ben reached out with the force, his physical hand extended opposite the hilt and Rey’s own hand. “Help me help you.” With his eyes screwed shut in focus he missed the detail of his tools leaving the floor, finding their way into the air.

Rey's hand relaxed, finding that it was as if a weight was lifted off her shoulders when she put away all her anger, stress and fear in terms of the force. Her own hand raised, and the saber slowly started to come together. Rey's eyes immediately lit up in excitement, an excited laugh escaping her lips as the metal joined. With both of their power, the saber was fixed, and ready for a Jedi to use.

Ben looked upon the repaired blade with a reverence once reserved for his grandfather, now putting that line of hate and guilt to rest. Using his powers Ben placed the hilt in Rey’s hand, the metal still cold as though it had never been split or repaired. 

“Go... go to Leia and she will teach you the ways of the force, your ability to channel it’s power is sloppy, diluted. With the right training and commitment you too can be a powerful Jedi like Luke was. Do not make the same mistakes as those before you.”

Ben didn’t add what he was thinking but certainly he fell into the category of failure as well as many others. “If you must find me, this will be a sanctuary of grey between the dark and the light this galaxy seems to favor.” He stood up and used the force to quickly clean up the mess of scattered tools and debris, his hands now at his sides as he frowned.

Rey put the newly fixed saber in her bag with a grin on her face. She was proud of herself, which was definitely a feat. But when she heard that she was to return to Ajan Kloss, that smile slowly faded. Looking upon Ben's face and seeing his frown made what was left of that smile fade. 

"...You're sure there's nothing else you can teach me?" she asked, a disappointed look on her face. She liked spending time with Ben, she didn't feel like she had the weight of the world on her shoulders. He understood that she wasn't just someone trying to be a Jedi, she was Rey. And her friends sometimes had difficulty knowing the difference. "Are you going to be alright?" she added after a beat of silence.

Ben looked Rey in the eyes and took a couple steps closer, grabbing her wrist to keep the saber from dropping into the bag.

“Rey.. This weapon is your life. Don’t lose it.” Ben felt the need to back away so he did take just a step back, separating them a little more. He hesitated, her piercing eyes looking for more within the husk of Kylo Ren, but Ben was barely there anymore, or so it was how he felt about it. 

“There’s little more that I can teach you now, perhaps in good time but I have an entire government following my command, I can’t disappear like that..” Ben wanted to say ’- even though I wanted too.’ but that would only make matters worse. Ben knew his mother enough to know that Rey would reveal that they had seen each other, his mother was just that good. “You should go, but should either need the other, this ancient temple will serve as a good place of hiding from prying eyes.”

Rey felt her heart start to race as he grabbed her wrist, almost dropping the saber they had just worked so hard to fix. What the hell was this feeling? She felt as if she were floating. Her chest felt tight, but not in an anxiety-driven way, no, this was different. Ben, Kylo, or whatever she was supposed to call him was good. She could see it and feel it in her bones. When Ben broke his gaze and stepped back, Rey carefully placed the saber and bag on the ground before almost tackling the Supreme leader in a hug. She buried her face in his chest as her arms wrapped around his torso, trying to hide how much she didn't want to leave and feel the weight of the galaxy once more. 

"I don't think you're a monster, Ben." she said just above a whisper.

He couldn’t have felt her own turmoil just before the embrace because of simply how he was distracted by his very own internal struggle. The hug, if he could call it that was sudden, matching the often sporadic nature in which she seemed to conduct herself in. With his strong grip he took her shoulders in hand and gently separated them after giving Rey a moment. Looking down into her eyes he spoke softly but almost stoically as well. 

“I’m irredeemable, Rey. You just don’t understand.” Without letting the hurt get to him Ben pushed away and lifted her off the ground, walking to distance her nearly a meter from the end of the ramp. He pressed the appropriate button on the access panel and the ramp closed slowly. Ben’s eyes showed his weakness in sadness of having to be so harsh in leaving the younger force user. 

“Goodbye Rey.” Was the last he said before even their eye contact was broken. He slowly retreated to the cockpit, feeling utterly defeated by the very feelings he was taught to harness. Ben started the ship's startup sequences so he could leave as soon as possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	7. Lightning Strikes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey's powers have become undeniably strong, as well as her feelings towards Ben Solo.

Rey didn't expect for Ben to separate the both of them, just simply stay there frozen. And she would've been fine with that. But her heart dropped to her stomach as Ben's hands placed on her shoulders and gently pushed her away. The pain showing in Rey's eyes was immediate. Then he had to call her by her name, Rey. Not Scavenger, Rey. She liked hearing him say her name so casually, it was almost ridiculous. By the time Ben was back in the cockpit, Rey was already retrieving her saber and her bag. It may have not seemed like a big deal for her to embrace him, but it was the world to Rey. It was hard for her to show her care for someone, especially after her parents. They left her because they didn't care about her. And she expected Ben to care, as stupid as it sounded, but no. He didn't care. No one cared, no one understood her.

The scavenger walked back into the medical wing, her heart pounding in her chest as the anxiety and pain built up in her chest. Closing the door behind her as the ship took off, Rey put the bag down again and started pacing, trying to force the tears threatening to fall to stay back.

"Don't cry....you always expect people to be different....and you cry every time they leave...." she muttered to herself through deep breaths, "Everyone always leaves." she furiously wiped at her eyes as she sat down against the wall, trying to get herself to calm down.

With a single hand on the switch to send the ship from its current place on the platform to the highest possible orbit the coldness crept back into Ben’s mind, and like emerging from cold water he could see her. She was standing there, crying, and he was responsible for that pain, like so many other tears and cries of pain. 

Ben whispered into his vision. “You will never understand...” Then the image of an X-wing left in the hanger would be shown to her. Rey was free to leave Yavin-4 at any time she pleased, but Ben knew that wouldn’t be for a while. The dark son of Solo closed their connection like holding the hole in the dyke, if he left it be it would open, but for her sake he couldn’t let that happen anytime soon. 

It was completely irresponsible and horribly rude to leave the woman he sometimes felt he couldn’t live without, stranded on a planet by herself with no one to console her. A tear rolled down his face as he jumped to lightspeed towards the rendezvous of his flagship. This weakness he harbored would destroy him if he allowed it, and perhaps that’s what he deserved.

The way Ben left Rey had her in pieces. More pieces that she was already in from everything she had been through in her unluckily dealt out life. For the first couple of days, Rey chose to not feel anything. She was numb as she would practice using the force, sometimes trying to connect with Ben only to realize that he had closed off their connection. That only made Rey hurt all the more. She spent that particular night staring up at the sky, wondering why in the world she wasn’t enough, much like she used to back on Jakku.

After the numbing and devastation had passed, Rey put her feelings into one of the only outlets left at her disposal. Training. But not meditation and force training, fighting and agility training. Spending countless hours of relentless training, overworking herself to exhaustion and only pushing further and further. At one point, the saber slipped from her grasp, spinning and grazing her shoulder. Rey simply deactivated the saber and wrapped her now bleeding left shoulder and continued. This night however, Rey just spent it sitting at the base of a tree, leaning against it as she tried to connect with Ben every once and awhile. If she were to be honest, she didn't really want to connect with Ben again, because that would lead to confrontation. At the same time, she wanted to see him again, hear him again... feel him again.

Kylo purposefully lost himself in his work as supreme leader of the First Order, his every command spoken with a venomous hatred of himself and already within the first day he had slew two stormtroopers for disobeying a direct although rather stupid order to patrol the engine bay just so he could be alone on the bridge in the late hours of the ship’s nighttime hours. Tears flowed down his scarred face freely and silently as the two men lay dead just outside the room. His hands clasped at his back and legs spread in a stance of power and stability that he failed to feel within. 

The second and third day passed the same with almost nobody getting in a single word with the man. Even Hux saw the red flags well enough not to directly approach him. More than a few hours were spent without a lightsaber, training against droids in hand to hand combat and playing an awful lot of dejarik chess by himself. Not unlike a bell at the end of a string, ben could tell when Rey reached out, their bond with and through the force making it impossible to avoid one another. After a lonely afternoon of physical training, Ben laid on a bench trying to avoid his feelings as his chest heaved from the intense workout. His A-shirt clung to his chest with sweat and as the coldness of the Force lazily filled his mind, the gateway between his mind and Rey’s opened, around him was suddenly filled with the dread of coming to bear with his rightly earned consequences. 

“Rey..?” He called out into the empty room around him.

Sitting against the tree with her eyes closed, the cool wind blowing in her face. Her arm, now tied with a piece of her own shirt that she ripped off, still hurt, but the bleeding had stopped. She didn't expect Ben to open his end of their connection, but upon hearing his voice, her heart jolted. The young woman opened her eyes to see Ben laying on a bench in whatever room he was in. 

"What do you want?" she asked coolly, attempting to hold back the pure anger she was feeling at that particular moment. "I thought you didn't want to talk."

Admittedly Ben thought Rey would try to outright attack him like she once had with a blaster, but the anger was easy enough to see and she had a right to feel that way. 

“I’m a danger to you, and you to me.. I want to make sure you understand that” He sat up and wiped his face with a towel he then calmly dropped to the floor. Ben was calm, the look of Kylo Ren burned in his eyes with a mix of sadness. “You don’t actually believe anything could happen between us, do you?” Deep down the scarred man had hoped for something, especially when their force bond had been revealed, but like water and fire Ben believed they couldn’t peacefully coexist.

Of course that was why he contacted her....it wasn't to see if she had made it back alright if she left at all, nor an apology for hurting her. And that only made Rey more mad. 

Standing up, the scavenger walked closer, "What could happen, Ben? What possibly do you think could happen between us?" she asked, her face expressionless. But her eyes...they only conveyed betrayal and hurt. They were always a giveaway. "What do you assume I believe?" The tension between the two of them was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

Ben, still feigning a calmness that those who knew him closely could have been a trap, he looked her in the eyes and replied almost nonchalantly. “I can see it in your eyes now.. your feelings betray you.” 

Ben could not actually see her feelings and thoughts, whether knowingly or not, she had built up a barrier that had kept him out indefinitely. “You were hoping to become closer to me, yet I don’t understand why..” The fallen Jedi knew full well but his thoughts told him why it’d never work, he was a broken man that could not be fixed by a scavenger or her tools.

"I....I don't know why either." Rey replied quietly, looking down at the ground, her gaze breaking from his own. "I don't know why I care. I never care." she chuckled bitterly immediately after saying so, because even she knew that it was a lie. 

"I don't know why I thought you could care about me." At her last comment, she immediately remembered his words back when she was under Luke's training. And remembering his words only made her angrier. "Maybe it was because you said I wasn't nothing to you, or maybe I'm just remembering wrong. You constantly told me over and over again that you wanted me by your side, Ben!" her voice raised as she looked back up at him.

Ben simply shook his head in response to her words that felt like they were made from confusion and backed by nothing else. “Don’t you pretend like you never cared, you reek of compassion for everything around you!” 

The dark Jedi felt a little hurt by his own words, and how he probably just hurt Rey. Ben had noticed the bandage but not mentioned it, now was not the time to be that petty. “I offered you my hand and you didn’t take it then, now the First Order would demand your head if you showed up.” Ben hadn’t tried to sound bitter but it certainly had sounded that way.

"And I wanted to take your hand! Do you have any idea how many nights I've spent lying awake wondering what would've happened if I gave myself up? If I just gave up? I can't sleep a full night without you in my head and I can't stop it!" Rey shouted back at him, her hands shaking. "And I have no idea why me telling you that I don't think you're a monster makes you push me away. I thought you wanted me to care for you!"

Ben felt his own rage build as their attitudes towards each other’s drop lower than the sinking feeling in his heart. “I have only hoped it tortured you the same way it did to me night by night...” Ben was now shouting into the empty room in front of him, surely scaring anyone away from interfering, lest they be destroyed by Kylo Ren. 

“You know my soul is split by my deeds! I don’t deserve your kindness!” A rock on the ground beside Rey flew into his hand and shattered into dust with an explosion of blue energy. Unknown to himself, Ben had tears stinging his eyes and flowing down his cheeks. Afterwards Ben Solo took a few deep yet still angry breaths before speaking anymore. “Yavin-4.... Two weeks, come with Leia or alone, nobody else.”

To hear that Rey wasn't alone in her torment made her pause, jumping as the rock shattered in his hand. His hurting made her hurt more. Her anger simmered down a bit upon seeing the tears running down his cheeks. The scavenger just wanted to reach out and comfort the fallen Jedi. 

"I'll be there...Ben, please. I don't care if you think you deserve kindness or not. I'm still going to be kind to you." she said gently, taking a careful step towards him.

Ben had felt enough pain that evening, even his heart and mind feeling overburdened by guilt. With a solemn expression the dark Jedi simply nodded a silent ‘ _No’_ , he let their connection hang open, allowing Rey to collapse the disastrous encounter on her own accord, he left the empty room around him as comfort beyond a woman that sat hundreds of light years away with more stubbornness than Leia Organa Solo. 

The dust on the floor stole his attention as he realized what had happened, this shook him to the core that such potential was still laid undiscovered.

The moment that Ben had uttered _'No,'_ Rey immediately tried to reach out. But due to the emotional turmoil stirring within her, by some force of nature, a flash of blue lightning struck Yavin-4. Rey jumped, a flash of fear in her expression as she looked down at her own shaking hand. "...W-what was that?" she whispered in shock.

Ben wasn’t as surprised by his own power as hers, the grandson of Skywalker was expected to be this strong in the force. The fallen Jedi jumped back, afraid it would hit him but somehow her abilities did not reach across as he had. 

“Yavin.. one week.” Ben changed their plans for them, these shocking new discoveries becoming more important by the second. “You may want to stay put.. contain your hate Rey.”

"But I don't hate you!" Rey tried to explain, "I-I don't know what's going on, this has never happened before..." By now, tree branches and rocks and leaves had started floating around her without her actively thinking about it. Panic had set in and Rey just sat on the ground, her head on her hands as she tried to sever the connection and make everything stop. Everything fell to the ground, and Rey looked up again at Ben. "....what did I just do?"

Ben watched with horrified fascination as Rey seemed to amplify her abilities in the force. As everything that had been lifted came crashing back down Ben had no idea what to think or how to process this new information, his emotions fried with just the events of forty eight hours. 

“I.. I don’t know, just. Be careful... and Rey?” His eyes spoke of a sober honesty that was filled with hurt. “Go to Leia, one week.” The dark Jedi reached out and pushed her back a little as he willed their shared vision to collapse once more. 

The younger Solo had to go to the medical wing for at least a day in a bacta tank just to heal his body enough to get some sleep.

Rey was about to say something when the connection ended. What if Leia didn't understand? Sure, the General was kind to her, but at the same time, she had been going behind her back lately to see and talk to Ben. Would she know? Picking up her belongings, Rey boarded the Millennium Falcon once more, setting her coordinates to Ajan Kloss. All she had to do was wait out a week...just one week. Then she and Ben would talk once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	8. Rebuilding Bridges and Breaking Chairs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey reunite of Yavin-4 after the discovery of the true power Rey possesses.

Awaking from a nightmare in his bed, the supreme leader had his lightsaber in hand and ignited before he knew what was going on, his haunted dreams had been of Rey, and this frightened Ben. The fleet of destroyers he personally commanded has been drifting through pirate territory and eliminating possible threats to the First Order, but Kylo Ren was barely involved and had left Hux in control of most everything that was going on. With a secret order sent directly to the ship’s computers that were protected by the position of supreme leader Ben had a pod full of supplies sent to Yavin 4 and three other random systems as well just to mask his trail. The training would continue but now it was by the difficult task of eventually teaching Rey, it was unavoidable as he thought about every swing of the crimson blade.

Rey made it back to Ajan Kloss before long, accompanied by BB-8 who was sworn to secrecy about her whereabouts over the past week. There were many questions when she returned from Finn and Poe, but Leia seemed to keep quiet. Rey told the General that in a week's time, she would have to go back out of the base once more, and Leia simply nodded in approval. It unnerved the girl, but she decided against bringing her silence up. Rey's nightmares only got worse. She'd wake up to her minuscule amount of furniture in her hut floating as she panicked. Only one week, and she'd be back on Yavin 4.

The week passed, as long and agonizing as it felt, and Rey decided to load up a smaller ship just for her and leave the Millennium Falcon back on Ajan Kloss. The journey to Yavin 4 was stressful, and Rey was convinced she hadn't been more anxious in her life.

The man known as Kylo Ren stalked the bridge of the functional but limping Supremacy. Not a day had gone by that Rey’s inherent yet latent force abilities popped into the young Solo’s mind and worried him to the point of another breakdown that even Hux was starting to catch on that something had changed. In only a week Kylo had formed a crew for the still-in-repairs Supremacy with Hux at the helm and a ultimately trusted and loyal skeleton crew on the Finalizer as a means of trying to create a stable chain of command within the First Order. Simply the ways of the old republic as recorded seemed to be the only reliable source of manageable control. Without truly a ship of his own Ben took the shuttle to Yavin again, hoping Rey had positive news about his mother and her thoughts on the current state of things. 

As the diamond like black shuttle circled around to land Ben saw an odd ship but knew it must be Rey by pure instinct. The pressurized cabin hissed as the ramp lowered and the black robed man descended solemnly. 

”Rey..?” The skilled Force user called to the woman he knew so much about yet felt so close too.

Rey, who was just getting out of her ship heard Ben call out as his ship landed. "I'm here." she responded. Short, a bit detached from where she was now. The girl was understandably frightened by these new abilities that had so much untapped potential. If her emotions made everything worse...what was she supposed to do? Suppress her feelings and desires into complete nothingness? Become cold, emotionless and stand-offish? That wasn't in Rey's nature, she just couldn't stand to live that way.

Walking a bit closer towards the shuttle, Rey waited anxiously for the Supreme Leader to meet her halfway. She didn't know what subject they were to tackle first, her abilities, or their unshared feelings?

Ben immediately turned to face Rey and saw her also disembarking from her own odd ship. He stopped mid-pace to allow her to move closer, unaware of what might happen. Now with his cloak flapping in the breeze Ben signaled Rey to follow him into the ancient massassi temple that was once bustling with rebellious activity. After letting her get behind him in the stone walked hallway Ben spoke out and the nature of the rock made his speech reverberate off the walls. 

“I knew you were strong with the force, even more so than Snoke was willing to believe in his arrogance. Did Luke not teach you that there must be a balance in all things?”

They had reached the old and somewhat dusty command room that held a circular holo table that had long since been deactivated. Ben rounded it to face Rey with still a couple feet between them, the fallen Jedi had dark rings under his eyes.

Rey followed Ben into the old massassi temple, crossing her arms as the stood. At the mention of Luke, Rey tensed a little. Often, the Jedi felt she was not living up to his teachings. But with so little time to teach her, there was so much to learn in so little time. While Ben had gone under years of training, Rey had a mere few months under her belt. "He did...balance of the light and dark. The Force... created by life and binds the galaxy together." She replied as she looked up at him, her eyes avoiding his own, but no doubt scanning over his features, observing his apparent exhaustion.

Ben looked entirely discouraged and even a little upset with the lack of honest eye contact from her. 

“Rey. You are letting yourself fall victim to your own insecurities. You are in control, like a conduit in the force.” Ben was looking for body language and could tell she had been nearly just as sleepless, clearly the nightmares. “Lift that chair.” He pointed to an old chair that lay broken on the floor, unused for decades. “Only that chair. If you cannot, there is only one solution but I need to know what you think you are actually capable of.” Ben was being condescending but Rey was being dangerous, and especially dangerous to be a threat to his mother, wherever she currently resided.

The condescending tone was not a help to Rey's own anxieties. But at the same time, she wasn't surprised. The scavenger was scaring herself with the power she held. Following Ben's instruction, Rey tried her best to be in tune with the force, push away the looming pressure and focus on the chair alone. Raising her shaking hand and extending her arm out, Rey attempted to lift the chair. The broken pieces floated, and to her surprise, began to mend themselves, but as if something in her snapped, the chair broke again, splinters shooting out. Rey immediately ducked, covering her face to protect her eyes.

Ben watched with that familiar morbid curiosity that flashed to hope then despair as quickly and closely as one sun followed the other on a Tatooine sunset. As Rey dove for cover and tried to protect herself, Ben had taken the 13 fragments of metal and wood that had flown at him and held them in the air before he walked over to Rey to only find a couple light scratches on her. As Ben helped her off the floor the fragments then bolted from their position in the air straight through the place the dark Jedi had been standing and smashed into the stone brick walls. 

“There is no hope for you here Rey. Come with me, and I can help you learn how to control your emotions.” This tone was fair, like one of justice in a court but with an air or kindness that seeped through. “Any further questions before we get underway?” Ben knew she didn’t understand, how could she with the limited knowledge the dusty old Jedi books and a week with Luke?

Rey nodded silently, swallowing the lump that was forming in her throat, "I thought I had it that time..." she sighed, rubbing her eyes as she unknowingly leaned against him slightly. She was exhausted, frustrated, and overall exasperated with her situation. "I don't know what I'm doing wrong...I'm doing everything I was before when I had control...how are you going to help me?" The Jedi asked, finally looking up at him and in the eye. "Not to doubt your teaching...but you don't look like you've been at peace lately, yourself."

Ben should have expected such an attitude from Rey but it had honestly caught him off guard. “Well I think we know why my teaching was never completed.” Ben presented the witty comment with distaste towards both his teachers, both had been failures yet for two completely different reasons.

“It’s fair that you feel that way anyway.” Ben let her lean against him for as long as she needed too, willing to comfort her with such feelings he so desperately wished to chase. “How ready are you to travel off world?” He said confidently and without a negative tone like before.

Rey couldn't help but crack a small smile at his remark. She hadn't really heard him joke like that before, and it was a nice change, but this new attitude perplexed her. Was this Ben Solo, reaching out from the shadows of Kylo Ren? 

"Ready, I suppose. Where are we going?" she asked, stepping away from leaning on him once she realized what she was doing. He clearly expressed that he wanted space between them with their last interaction, so Rey was more inclined to provide him with that space. The last thing she wanted now was for him to go off the rails again.

Ben allowed Rey to make space between them without any complaint. Rey only knew what Ben told her and with the use of context clues how he felt or what he thought, so Ben was truly afraid that Rey was unaware of his longing to be closer to the scavenger.

“You wouldn’t know if I told you, but simply so you’re not going into this next test blind..” He turned to face her directly, looking her in the eye with a relaxed expression. “Dagobah.. that’s the destination.” The fallen Jedi quickly turned away to activate the rest of the base possible from the derelict control room. Generators hummed to life as some lights flickered to life around that lower floor. “You know eventually you can let your friends come back here. It’s the last place the First Order would check for a threat.”

Rey was surprised once more by Ben's words. Pleasantly surprised, but surprised nonetheless. "...You know you could join us here if you wanted, right?" she asked quietly, tilting her head to the side a bit. 

"I...I know General Organa misses you, Ben. Whenever we get information she is always so quiet, but I can tell she wants you to come home." The scavenger's tone was soft and gentle, almost cautious as she told Ben this. Sure, Leia was devastated when Han met his end, but she would always love her son. Much like how Rey saw it, Kylo Ren was just keeping Ben Solo hidden away.

Ben sighed because he knew Rey was right, but there was still issues to be dealt with there, mostly having to do with his history. “Even if Leia wants me back, and you do too, what about the hundreds or thousands of others who would want my head?” It hurt to know his mother missed him so badly, but surely there’d be hell to pay even if he popped in to secretly say hello. 

“We will speak more about this later, but now you are a danger to yourself and those around you because of your feelings, your thoughts. Now come with me.” As the fallen Jedi moved to leave he spotted an old DL-45 blaster that had collected dust over the years, he grabbed it without hesitation. “Grab your things from your ship but leave a coded distress signal to your allies. You can take whatever other steps you need to in order to let your friends know you are okay. You have ten minutes to be on my shuttle.” Now he moved past her to leave but stopped to give her a supportive look as he gripped her shoulder for a moment, but it passed and Ben kept walking.

Rey complied with his decision to pause the subject, figuring there would be time for them to talk about it once again at some point. As the fallen Jedi put his hand on her shoulder, she looked back at him, the corners of her lips turning upward ever so slightly into a ghost of a smile in gratitude of his help. Heeding his word, Rey went to her small ship and gathered her things, quickly getting out a coded distress signal. She did the same, sending messages to BB-8 for Finn, Poe, and Leia, assuring them that she was safe. When she was done, Rey exited her spacecraft and made it over to Ben's shuttle, beating the time limit by a good two minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	9. Training

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the chair fiasco, Ben helps Rey train a bit, but in the process, realizes just how powerful their connection is.

Ben was in his shuttle checking the locking mechanism on two wall mounted luggage crates that were about the size of his torso, two larger metal contraptions sat in one of the corners as well. “All ready?” Ben had removed his cloak which made his hip mounted blaster holster more visible as well as his lightsaber and other bits of equipment. The son of Solo looked like his father more than anything, but had the soft heart of his mother, this led to him almost constantly looking angry or upset no matter what. The dark robed man approached Rey and stood just before her, looking down into her eyes with a careful studying look before turning on a heel for the cockpit.

"Ready." Rey confirmed with a short nod. As Ben approached her, Rey's eyes did not deter from his own this time. Looking back at him with genuine curiosity as he turned, Rey followed, "You keep giving me that look." she commented as she sat in one of the passengers' seats in the cockpit. "What is it? Did I do something?" the young woman asked. Ben's actions were most confusing to her, because she didn't know what he wanted. She didn't even really know what she wanted, but with Ben, it was unpredictable. Maybe that was a reason Rey couldn't help but be fascinated by him.

Ben nodded as he hit the appropriate switches to begin the takeoff sequence and the ship began to lift away from the temple. “Hm? Oh, yes.. I look at you and it’s like I’m seeing you for the first time, like a wild animal that has no idea of its stake in the bigger picture.” Ben soared the ship up out of the atmosphere and took off towards the opposite side of the gas giant, Yavin itself. “Where did you learn to do that?” Ben asked with a frustrated tone as the navi-computer calculated their first jump. The son of Han Solo was an extremely good pilot, keeping the ship steady just outside Yavin’s pull.

"I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered." Rey smirked, shaking her head. Though what really amused her was him talking to the ship. Amusing enough to get a small laugh out of her, "I don't think it can hear you Ben, as intelligent as it may seem." she remarked with a grin, her dimples visible. For the first time in more than a week Rey wasn't so scared or sorrowful. She genuinely was happy spending time with Ben when he wasn't leading the First Order. "You seem to have a pretty good hang of it though."

Ben smiled ever so slightly and felt the need to tell Rey what she should be feeling. “No.. it’s..” The fallen Jedi had to stop himself from talking as he sighed, Rey hadn’t understood and now he was being laughed at. “Rey, as nice as it is to see you smile, I was talking to you, and you should feel flattered because it’s not every day I compliment someone.” 

The ship had cleared the planet and Ben engaged the hyperdrive with the push of two main switches in the center of the console, not unlike those of the Falcon. “I had meant where you learned to manipulate objects with the force, but it seems you’re enjoying yourself a little too much in my company.”

Rey's smile faded slightly, feeling a bit foolish at her own assumptions. "Sorry...um, well...Luke taught me, I suppose. He told me to reach out with my feelings. I could see the island we were standing on...life and death, balance and energy between everything. And then the dark called to me, and I almost followed. Luke was furious....." She sighed at the memory. "And from then, I had to teach myself. Just feel what I'd felt before the darkness." Her gaze had directed down to the ground as she explained, and now turned her head to look at Ben. "Not the best curriculum, I know....I wake up some nights with everything floating around me."

“Don’t feel foolish, it was a little funny under that context.” Ben laid a comforting hand on her shoulder for a moment but cleared his throat and pulled his hand away awkwardly. “No, it’s actually probably the worst curriculum you could have had. Here..” The added context of Rey’s bedroom some nights was a little concerning as far as traveling with her went, but that’s what the trip was for after all. Ben pulled the communicator from his belt and set it between them. “Do you see the communicator?” He asked rather obviously.

The comforting hand on her shoulder made her smile come back just a bit. But upon him taking out the communicator, Rey gave Ben a look of confusion. "....Yes?" she replied in an almost questioning tone. What was the purpose of her identifying a communicator? It was something she saw every day on Ajan Kloss, what with everyone constantly needing to be in contact with each other. "Why does that matter? Anyone with the ability to see can see it."

The dark robed man understood this confusion as it was part of the little lesson he was prepared to teach. “Now.. forget it completely. Do not let it exist in your mind, banish the very concept from this moment of thought!” His voice risen slightly as his enthusiasm builds. “Do not even look at it, yet you must not actually destroy it.” Ben was wise enough to tag on that bit on the end after what had happened to the chair.

Rey closed her eyes, trying to get her mind to focus on something other than the communicator....what could she focus on? His voice, Ben's voice. The way it trembled and wavered, the deep baritone that bounced off the walls of the shuttle. Ben's voice, if only she could solely focus on that. Even as he stopped talking, Rey started recounting every single one of their interactions in her mind, focusing on Ben's voice. The difference of it and how it had changed toward her over time.

Ben could feel what was only describable as a little red string in the force, that if followed back to it’s point of origin, he found Rey. 

“That’s good, very good. What do you see?” While cruel he was trying to deceive her and distract her as she held strongly to her anchor. If Rey was as powerful as he believed then she would truly forget the object was ever there, 'the bigger picture' is what Luke had always called it.

Rey’s eyes remained closed, feeling like water had just washed over her. “I see red….and blue…” she described, “Fear...rage...conflict…” her hands gripped her knees and she flinched, much like she did when they first fought against each other, shadows moving in her mind. “Grief.” Rey breathed. It was almost as if she could directly feel the emotions of the other half of the dyad. “Why are we doing this again?” she asked, opening her eyes once more to look over at him.

Ben felt and looked hurt to hear everything he could currently feel deep inside like it was a list of symptoms to a horrible sickness. His pain was shown in the way her hands and arms flexed and she flinched. Just before Rey looked back up at him he wiped away a tear that threatened to fall. 

“Look.” Was all Ben said as he pointed to the communicator on the ground. “You passed the test, but you still have much to learn.” Using the force the small electronic device flew back to his hand and he clipped it back to his belt. “Master Luke would be proud...” Ben quietly mentioned like he might have all those years ago.

Rey studied Ben's face in slight worry, seeing how the tone of his voice had changed. "Thank you...really. You're a good teacher." she said as she hesitated before putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Are you alright?" she inquired, knowing how he truly felt now. And it hurt her. It physically hurt her, feeling his pain. It so closely matched her own emotions that seemed to be becoming more and more of a fear to her as days passed and she tried to figure out what certain feelings meant to her.

“I was always told that ’okay’ was too simple of an answer to one’s problems or in your case questions.” Rey’s hand had certainly sent a small shiver down his spine but he remained vigilant not to play all his cards yet, including those having to do with his feelings for her. “To answer your question, no I am not. The guilt of the Hosnian system weighs heavy with the rest of my deeds. Whether with the helmet on or off.”

"While I agree the things that you've done aren't good...I do believe you can be redeemed." Rey responded, reaching up and brushing some of his hair away from his face before placing her hand back on his shoulder. "You're helping me...and in the long run, I think you know what helping me does for the Resistance. You were young and vulnerable when Snoke manipulated you. Your actions are easily explainable...even if they were deplorable. You can be a good man, Ben."

Ben turned away for only the briefest of moments before addressing the younger Jedi. “You see the good in me just the same as Leia can, but what about the army I would help fight for that can’t tell others feelings, who only know me as the man that burned their homes and slaughtered their families?” Now a tear was visibly rolling down his cheek, the split in his soul had always been painful regardless of which side he pulled on. “Snoke made the orders but I followed them. Do you understand this Rey?”

"I do...believe me, I do." Rey sighed, reaching up and wiping his tears away, being as gentle and understanding as she could be in that moment. "It's going to hurt regardless. But you can make the choice to end the hurting of others as well. It's not a fix for all...but you can start healing and let others get an opportunity to do the same..." she stated, trying her best to appeal to this softer side of him she was finally starting to see.   
Like a fortification that had spotted incoming enemies, Ben shut Rey out and left the cockpit for the cargo hold, grunting something in such a low and animalistic growl that it was impossible to gain any information from. Rey knew how to help Ben and tried her best, but it angered him to know just how little he actually cared to be better. After a few minutes behind the closed doors of trying not to slash something open with his lightsaber, Ben popped out the small survival stove and started a stew on the fire. Ben wasn’t ready to accept the possibility of forgiveness.

Rey remained in the cockpit of the ship, pulling her knees up to her chest, gazing out at the stars and planets in front of her as she thought. She wanted so desperately to help, to show she cared. But at the same time, the vulnerability of that decision had her stressed and anxious. She'd shown Ben she cared about him, and he simply got up and walked away. Yet another thing he could possibly hold over her head if he wanted to, making the side of the dark so much more tempting to her. Rey simply closed her eyes, apologizing through their connection before disconnecting.

"I'm sorry."

Ben had been sitting there with a spoon in hand stirring the hot, steaming broth for some time when the briefest contact came through the void of the force. Using his own practiced abilities the door between them slid open quietly and a bowl gently hovered to the panel desk in front of her, the door shutting noisily afterwards. 

”It’s not you...” drifted into his mind but he hadn’t the courage to let it drift into hers like a feather. The soup warmed him from within but did nothing for the fire that burned in his heart.

Though Ben hadn't verbally expressed his thoughts, or even used their connection, the small gesture of simply floating the bowl over to her was enough for her. She knew this was difficult for him. Sipping on the soup every few moments, the young woman continued to look out at the stars. Thinking about her situation, where they would go from here. Before the young woman knew it, she was fighting to keep her eyes open.

Ben would be there to catch the bowl as the brunette dozed off, he placed it carefully on the console. Scooping up the woman in his arms the fallen Jedi brought her to the cot and laid her down on it. Ben would not let the nightmares hurt her again, so with the ship moving on its course Ben would sit by her bed and wait for the moment to help if it was needed. He had her wrist in her hand as a way of grounding her presence in the moment beside him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next in the comment threads, and we'll reply!


	10. Night Terrors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The nightmares continue to plague Rey as she tries to sleep, and Ben seeks a way of ridding the nightmares from Rey’s mind for good.

That night, the nightmares would only taunt Rey more, her most deeply desired fantasies playing out only to be brought to a sickening halt due to her own hand.

_ The crisp, cool evening back on Yavin 4 was peaceful. The two of them had decided once they were done with Rey’s training, Ben would take her back to Yavin 4 and they would sort things out in regards to them caring for one another...and to say they were sorting things out was the biggest understatement of the century. _

_ “You sure?” Ben asked as he stood close to Rey, his arm wrapped around her waist and hand tilting her chin to look up at him. _

_ With a simple nod and smile from Rey, Ben immediately pressed his lips against hers in a kiss. The scavenger wrapped her arms around his neck while he stepped back and sat down on the pilot’s seat, pulling her into his lap. She laughed at his eagerness, her fingers playing with the dark hair at the nape of his neck. _

_ “You think something’s funny, do you?” Ben smirked against her lips, his hand now going up her shirt to rest on her waist, his thumb running back and forth along her smooth skin as he started trailing his kisses away from her lips and down to her neck. The girl’s breath hitched and he chuckled, amused by her reaction. The intense feelings between them were more than confirmed now as Ben started gently nipping at her skin, leaving behind a few dark hued marks along the side of her neck, making her rock forward and against him in his lap. _

_ Before they knew it, the both of them began to undress, mesmerized by the other’s form without any barriers between the both of them. But one thing Rey noticed about Ben was a scar on his stomach. She reached out and gently traced her finger over it. _

_ “Where’s this one from?” she asked him quietly, giving him a tender kiss on the cheek. _

**_“You, from the last time you drove a saber through me.”_ **

_ Rey immediately pulled her hand back, looking up at him in confusion and horror. “I...I’ve never-” _

_ “It happens every night now, doesn’t it, Rey?” Ben laughed bitterly. “You accuse me of pushing you away and you do this to me….after all that I’ve done for you...after all I’ve given you...and you still think you’re any better than her. You are her, Rey.” _

_ Rey instantly knew the ‘her’ Ben was referring to. Her darker counterpart that plagued her nightmares. But for whatever reason….Rey couldn’t see her this time. That was, until Rey caught her own naked reflection in the windshield of the shuttle. By the time she looked back to Ben, he was just as he was in all of her nightmares before. In a pool of his own blood. _

_ “Ben...not again, please, I’m sorry….” Rey pleaded as she dropped to her knees and took his hand. “I’m so sorry...Ben, please, I didn’t mean to…” _

Ben had a hand on either shoulder of the scavenger and was trying frantically to wake her when she would finally open her eyes. “Rey?! Rey it’s me, it’s Ben, you’re okay. Just wake up.” 

The ship was on its final light speed jump to the Dagobah system when he noticed her shouting and groaning, tossing and turning in her sleep. Ben knew exactly how to help Rey tame such nightmares from within her heart, but it would be another thirty minutes at a minimum before they re-entered real space. 

“Just talk to me, are you okay? Are you hurt?” Ben had put aside their earlier argument to help the young woman simply because it felt like the right thing to do.

Rey woke up trembling, frantically wiping her eyes. She shook her head in response to Ben's question, she was completely fine. What she was terrified of was that maybe, just maybe, Ben wasn't. That somehow her dreams could become reality and she wouldn't be able to wake up.

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry." she sniffled, "They just won't stop, I-I try staying awake but I'll always have to sleep...and then it's always the same and I can't get it to stop." she tried to explain in her panicked state.

Ben took the trembling woman in his arms and held her, it hurt to see her hurt, for unknown reasons he felt awful to the point of physical pain and was suddenly willing to allow the scavenger to hold him and sob for hours if she truly needed it. 

“I am alright Rey, we’re almost there..” Ben spoke softly but reassuringly. Unbeknownst to them, their connection was much deeper than either could possibly know.

Rey hugged Ben tightly, burying her face in the crook of his neck and resting her head on his shoulder as she tried to slowly calm down. The fact that he held her in return helped reassure her, as odd as it sounded. He was safe, and she wasn't going to hurt him. He was alive, right in front of her. But the thing that helped her calm down the most was him comforting her, even though she was a mess. Ben was seeing Rey at her worst, and he wasn't leaving her side.

Eventually, the scavenger calmed down enough to where she wasn't crying anymore, just the occasional hiccup or sniffle as she hugged Ben. 

"...thank you." she said quietly. "Really...it helps, not being alone after waking up from that."

Ben had almost entered a meditative state while trying to calm Rey’s heart and mind, but it did not do much as the mental wall once put up by her stayed strong and unwilling to bend or break. 

It hadn’t made much sense to him, in fact it confused Ben quite a bit as to why he’d ever comfort someone in a similar way a father would.. or should from his experience. 

“I’m afraid I will leave you alone soon however. You will have to be stronger than ever before, even more than you were in that throne room, okay?” It felt absolutely alien to comfort someone but it did however feel less so when it was her, the girl from Jakku. The ship whistled over the comm system that it had automatically reentered real space at its destination. Dagobah.

Rey lifted her head from his shoulder, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, "Yeah...okay." she mumbled. 

As much as she wanted to be able to keep the nightmares away, to be able to fully control her abilities, she didn't want Ben to leave. She didn't want to have to leave him to go back to Ajan Kloss, while he went back to the First Order, the both of them on opposing sides once more. She'd have to fight him, and someone could get hurt. Just like in her nightmares. She'd never get that intimacy she craved and fantasized about before things would go wrong in her head that caused her to awake. 

"Have you been able to get any rest yet?" she asked, almost certain what his answer was already.

He hated that response.. it crushed him to hear her somber acceptance of news that wasn’t even fully revealed yet. In his head their bond was only that of a part time student and applicable teacher, but even he knew better than to think that was the end of it. Ben didn’t like the question so he asked one of his own. “What do you know about the training of Jedi Knights during the old republic?” Ben was afraid of connection, he hated being so gentle to a woman half the galaxy wanted dead and paraded around.

"Not much...just that Luke didn't really approve." Rey replied with a small sigh, resting her head on his shoulder once more and closing her eyes. "They weren't allowed to marry...I know that. They were brought up from a young age and given training. They had to pass trials in order to become a Jedi, right?" she hummed, enjoying having him hold her close. Even if he wasn't comforting her, and if it was the other way around, she'd still appreciate it. Because this part of Ben...this was the one he kept hidden so often. And it made Rey happy to see it.

“It does not surprise me at all to hear that..” Ben almost grinned and it was visible in the corners of his mouth. “Where I’m taking you, is the place that Luke passed his own trial, where I failed mine...” Ben stood up and walked to his seat in the cockpit, it was sudden but he had to guide the ship in. 

“You best come strap yourself in! It’s going to get really bumpy!” Turbulence already had begun to shake the shuttle as the swamp planet’s atmosphere was filled with swirling gasses and roving bird-like creatures. The tops of trees scratched the hull as Ben frantically searched the fog for a clear spot.

A little disappointed when Ben pulled away, Rey stood up as well and followed him, taking his advice and buckling herself into the passenger's seat. Gripping the arm rests of the seat, Rey remained seated through the ride, "You sure this is a good place to land?" she asked over the turbulence, grimacing as she heard the trees scratch the ship, no doubt leaving marks on the admittedly beautiful and well-crafted ship.   
The ship that was already struggling to make it through the thick, humid atmosphere of the planet had even greater trouble navigating the swamp forest that covered the planet. 

“No! I’m not sure at all!” After plowing through a handful more trees and through it generating a noise so loud it almost sounded like the ship was being torn apart, the advanced shuttle broke through over a large lake and smacked down into the water. The splash sent water an easy thirty feet in the air, disturbing some of the wildlife on the tree tops around the lake. “Are you okay?” Ben asked as he tried to avoid the sparks coming from the control panel.

After being on so many space crafts, you’d think that Rey would be unfazed by the turbulence and journey down into the water. Gripping on to the arms rests, her knuckles turned white as she waited with bated breath for the shuttle to cease movement. Luckily, the pair didn’t completely crash. “I’m fine, what about you? Are you alright?” she asked Ben, unbuckling herself from the seat and moving it back so she was further away from the control panel.

“Looks like I’m going to have to help you fix this up if you ever want to get out of here.” she sighed. Though secretly, Rey didn’t mind the extra time they would need to make the repairs. It just meant more time for her to train and talk with Ben.

Ben, having experienced the sort of rough landing before groaned a little but climbed out of his own seat towards the rear of the shuttle. “Yes, I’m alright. We need to get out of here before this thing sinks completely into the swamp.” The fallen Jedi climbed up the shallow incline of the crashed shuttle and used the force to open the ramp. “Carefully but quickly, no need to go injuring ourselves.” He grunted with every difficult step. Ben Solo was used to this kind of challenge but was unsure how Rey would fare with so little rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good to know you all like it so far. Please comment as it really helps us know what you think.


	11. Dragobah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey have finally landed on Dragobah, and Ben helps her past the traps set for the Knights of Ren.

Now on dryer land, the fallen Jedi had to catch his breath from the sudden turn of events after the past couple days of rather peaceful flight. He stood up and walked a few feet while looking around to find their bearings. 

“Dagobah.. This place was once home to the grand Jedi Master Yoda, teacher of Luke Skywalker.” Ben slung the strange pack he had grabbed on his way out to the front and pulled a glow rod from it, cracking and shaking the device so it glowed brightly. 

“Follow the Force and it will guide you to his home.” Ben hadn’t even made eye contact with her since the crash, just looking out into the swamp.

Following instruction, Rey closed her eyes, reaching out and following the Force. "Be with me...." she thought as a magnetic pull began to guide her to the home of the late Jedi Master Yoda. 

Opening her eyes and making her way through the trees and grass, a small hut starter came into view. There was no light on, and it was definitely vacant. Perfect for the two of them, even if the space was a bit small. "Ben! Over here." Rey called over her shoulder, spotting the glow rod through the thicket.

Ben was trying to find the old homestead himself but was having no luck when Rey called out to him. “Rey! Wait! It’s a trap!” 

As Rey would approach the hut, Ben would reach out and pull the woman back as the old mud and clay walls burst into a small inferno as rigged explosives went off. He ran to where she lay on the ground as black smoke rose from the remnants. “Hey! You still with me?” The son of Solo felt awful; he had forgotten to warn her about the trap, but he wasn’t even sure she’d find it so easy.   
Rey had immediately curled up in the fetal position out of instinct when she fell to the ground, used to needing to protect her head and face from explosions or debris from old and abandoned ships back on Jakku. When Ben came over, she started to sit up.

"Y-yeah, fine, just didn't expect that." she said, wincing as she moved her arm. It was the same one that was wrapped from a week earlier. Once she went back to Ajan Kloss, she properly stitched the wound up so it could heal properly, but they had now torn, "I just think I ripped a few stitches is all..."

Ben doubted Rey’s word, not that he didn’t trust her which was already in question between them two, but that the woman could possibly be fine after barely missing an explosion by so little. 

“Wait.. stitches? Where?” It had not occurred to him what she was talking about, but his ears were also slightly ringing from the explosion mere moments ago. Ben found Rey beautiful, sure, but his focus was almost lost in her eyes as he held her close. The grey robes Rey wore were smoking in the cool and humid air from their heat alone.

Looking up at him, Rey nearly lost her own train of thought as her heart beat rapidly. The adrenaline caused by the sudden explosion left her mind blank for a moment as she blinked back up at Ben, thinking of what to say next. 

“...Back on Yavin 4, after you left...I-I was training with the saber and I overworked myself. Probably not the best idea...I wrapped it and when I got back to Ajan Kloss I stitched it up.” It was apparent that her stitches had definitely been ripped, red now seeping through wrap around her upper arm.

Being the ever resourceful person Ben Solo was, his father having been the very prepared Han Solo, Ben ripped part of Rey’s sleeve off and quickly replaced the makeshift bandage with one of his own. He tied it tightly enough that soon enough the bleeding would stop. Ben hadn’t even caught what she said, his steel hardened focus split already between her wounds and their surroundings. 

“If it makes you feel better, that trap was set by the knights of Ren.” The fallen Jedi grunted as he finished the knot that would secure the bandage in place.

Rey flinched as he ripped the sleeve off. Seeing that the scar from his own saber was visible made her silent for a moment, watching him as he tied the cloth around her arm.

“Thank you.” she said quietly, looking at his handiwork. “Do you know if there are any other traps? Anything we should look out for?” Rey asked. The last thing they needed was to fall victim to another trap, regardless of what it could be.

It was understandable she’d ask, but he knew of the rest because of a simple reason. That reason was that he himself planted the other traps. 

“Just a couple more, and they won’t be in any trouble for quite awhile longer.” With nothing left to say Ben stood up and extended a hand to help Rey up, he flashed a grin for only a split second, but it was there. The fallen Jedi took a moment to look around at the surroundings before pointing and walking carefully in a straight line adjacent to the smoldering hut ruins.

Rey took his hand and let him help her up. Though she failed to let go of his hand, telling herself that it was for safety. After all, if she were about to step into another trap, he would be able to pull her back easily. But when she caught that grin on his face, her breath was taken away. If only she could get him to smile more...that would be something.

"...It's a shame that you don't smile much...you don't look half bad." she commented as nonchalantly as she possibly could.

The son of Han felt that strange connection when he grinned too, causing him to pull away and clear his throat that turned into a natural cough. “Well thank you, but we better get moving.” 

Using the force Ben moved some smoking debris out of the way of their path. Quickly the brush increased but shone occasional signs of burned cuts that once cleared hanging vines, some vines having even grown back. 

“Stop!” The Sith apprentice held out an arm to stop Rey just in case, as he pulled out a blaster rather similar to Han’s. “Probes ahead.” He said calmly before closing his eyes and shooting directly into three darker places among the lower tree branches where then after three probe droids fell to the ground.

"Nice shot." Rey muttered, glancing from the drones over back to his face for a brief moment before looking forward once more. "Anything else we should be worried about?" she muttered, jumping a bit as something brushed against her foot. 

She held her arm out in front of Ben and pulled out the saber, activating it only to see a small swamp creature with big green eyes and a small snout staring back up at her. Rey cleared her throat, putting her arm down again and deactivating the saber. "Sorry...thought that could be something else..." she explained, her face pink from embarrassment.

It was almost a welcome sight to see the strange creature, even if it had frightened Rey. ’Why did he care if it frightened her?’ He carefully stepped over the beast and ushered Rey forward once it had left. The ground had eroded at a slight decline in the direction they walked together and the vines, fog, and darkness became heavier. Just ahead was a stone archway that was clearly man made. 

“One more.” Using both hands Ben reached out and disassembled the archway, revealing and diffusing explosiveness hidden behind it. “I cannot follow you in there...” Ben swallowed hard as the presence of the dark felt like it could swallow him whole again. “Take only what you need in there... You won’t need your weapons..” The fallen Jedi collapsed onto his rear and his breathing felt labored, but it was all a trick of the dark.

Rey watched on in awe as the archway came apart. She was about to ask Ben if she could be of assistance, but by the time the thought had popped into her head, the archway had already been disassembled. Upon hearing that he couldn't go further with her, Rey frowned as she sat down on the ground next to him. 

"Are you alright? Why can't you come with me?" she asked, worried about the man in his weaker state.

Ben’s breathing was no longer so labored as he had sat down, his mind and heart refusing all that was dark. “That blasted cave...” He made eye contact with her and attempted a smile to ease her worry, again he didn’t quite understand why he cared enough to do this little act. “What lies within is your own trial.. your destiny. Fear not Rey, for fear.. is the path to the dark side.” Ben pulled himself up onto a stump where he could sit more comfortably. A cold sweat had formed on his brow without him even noticing.

"Are you sure you'll be alright?" Rey asked quietly as she looked up at Ben. How could she not be filled with fear? She barely knew what she was doing, and now she was scared for Ben's own well-being. Her whole life had been filled with fear. Fear of her parents never coming back, fear of not meeting Luke's expectations. Fear that she would let the entire Resistance down....and she had to completely throw all of that fear away to pass this trial.

“Yes. I am sure. It’s the darkness of this place. It’s said the darkness of this planet was why Yoda chose to hide here in exile. A perfect balance.” Utilizing how close he was to the Jedi in training, Ben took her blaster away, pulling it straight from the holster. “Like I said.. you won’t be needing your weapons.” He tossed the blaster aside where it nearly hit a large snake that was gliding by over the moss.

Looking from the blaster to back at Ben, Rey took a deep breath. "Okay..." she replied.

Before she stood however, Rey leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Ben in a hug. "Thank you for everything." she said quietly before pulling away. Flashing a final small smile, Rey stood up and walked onward into the cave, pushing all of her fear down. She had nothing to be afraid of.

Ben accepted the hug to keep Rey from worrying too much, even knowing compassion was as much a weakness as it was a strength. 

“Don’t thank me yet, this war is far from over.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	12. The Trial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey faces her trial alone, only to be met by a familiar face.

As Rey would enter the ‘cave’ two bats would fly out past her in fear of the intruder. A heavy fog filled the floor and shrouded the ankles of the Jedi, a dark presence hung in the air like the scent of rot and clung to the very bones of the only person close by, Rey. 

The sudden sound of a lightsaber followed by it’s arching red blade filled the space ahead of the woman, two scarlet beams were emitted from the strange lightsaber a woman held, the woman was an exact copy of Rey, only clothed in black robes and a hood. The hilt unfolded and became a two ended lightsaber. An evil laughter filled the dense air and the dark copy of Rey lunged out with her double ended lightsaber.

A shiver ran up Rey's spine as she came face-to-face with her own living nightmare that she had been dreaming about for the past few months. With no weapon, Rey had no way except hand-to-hand combat in means of defending herself. The thing that kept her from lashing out though, was remembering that she herself, was Rey. No one could make her anybody other than that but herself. The dark and dangerous woman in front of her was not Rey. Sure, she could look like a carbon copy, but they would never be alike.

Rey ducked as the saber swung in her direction, only focusing on self-defense at this point. "It's about time we met." she muttered under her breath.

The stone around Rey and her own dark image was wet to the touch, moss grew almost everywhere within. The scarlet blade came down a mere inch away from the Jakku native’s chest and the corrupted vision spat venom with her words. 

“You came to fight me without a blade, how pathetic!” More strikes came down but bounced harmlessly off the stone. 

Outside the cave was serenity in everything but the Force which seemed to be at war with itself near the maw of the stone entrance. Ben, still sitting where Rey left him, saw the bag the brunette had left behind deflate a little but he did not pursue such a curiosity lest it harm him. 

Back inside the cave that was beginning to look startlingly like a man made structure, Dark Rey force pushed her light bearing counterpart against the wall, holding her there and approaching slowly with a grin. There was a glinting of metal in the low light on a rocky outcropping in the wall to Rey’s left. It was the lightsaber given and repaired by Ben.

Rey, seeing the glinting metal out of the corner of her eyes, reached out ever so subtly, keeping eye contact with her darker counterpart. 

"You really were lonely, weren't you?" she asked, not in a tone of malice, but a gentle one of sympathy. 

This was the woman she would've become, had she let herself. Sure, they were the opposite, but there was still that look of loss and fear in the Dark Rey's eyes that matched her own. The difference, being that the other had let it consume and control her. Using the force, Rey got the saber to move toward her hand ever so slowly.

"I'm so sorry." Rey murmured as she quickly activated the lightsaber, the weapon surging forward and stabbing her opponent without warning.

Just as the scarlet blade came down on Rey the dark vision exploded into a quickly dissipating black cloud. Dark Rey’s screams faded into nothingness and the stranglehold of darkness and fear lessened greatly but did not completely leave the air about the cave. 

Ben felt the ripple in the Force and stood with more ease than only a minute ago and awaited the emergence of the young Jedi, Rey. It was undeniable that he had become in part her teacher, this idea nearly scared him but mostly just intrigued his thoughts. The dark Jedi waited patiently with a small smile of pride and acceptance in Rey.

Rey stood in shock for a few moments, the dark version of her having literally disappeared into nothingness. The vision of her that taunted her every night, that made her dread sleep...it was finally gone. It was hard to describe the emotions that ran through her at that moment. There was relief, for the most part, but there was still that small, minuscule part of her that was still afraid. She saw right in front of her own eyes what she could become if she chose the dark side, and seeing it outside of her nightmares was definitely unnerving.

Still, she came out victorious in the battle, and that made her at least somewhat proud. Deactivating her saber, Rey made her way out of the cave and back over to Ben. She came out with a few scrapes and bruises, but nothing too bad. The moment she saw Ben, along with the small smile on his face, Rey couldn’t help but break out into a grin, “So… how was that?” she asked, a bit breathless from the fight.

Ben sighed with relief to see Rey emerge relatively unscathed, and better yet, happy. Ben thought for a moment but before he could congratulate her he noticed the saber hilt in her hand. 

“The saber.. I thought you left it out here in your bag?” 

The fallen Jedi had hoped this trial would go well and it felt amazing to know it had. In the moment he had even forgotten about the shuttle half sunken in the swamp just one hundred twenty yards away. It felt strange but he had the feeling the young Jedi could use a hug so that’s what he did. Awkwardly but still somewhat naturally Ben Solo wrapped his arms around her and quietly he said. “Good job.”

"I don't know what happened....it just came into the cave." Rey answered. What she wasn't expecting however, was for Ben to initiate a hug, wrapping his arms around her and praise her work. She froze in shock for a moment as he hugged her, her brain taking a moment to process the situation before she happily returned the hug, hugging Ben tight. 

"Thank you...I couldn't have done it without you." she replied, closing her eyes for a moment as she enjoyed the embrace. "Are you alright?" Rey asked, opening her eyes and looking up at him. "I don't know...I didn't really take you to be a hug type of person." she chuckled.

Ben felt lighter like a weight had been lifted and it made him smile but more so confused as Rey returned the hug. “Yeah I’m alright.. I didn’t take myself as a hug person either.” He chuckled awkwardly but it didn’t hold any malice or darkness behind it at all. 

The fallen Jedi broke the hug and scratched his head as he stepped back, thinking of their next move. Leveling his gaze with hers, Ben spoke again but this time his usual determined self. 

“We need to get off this mud ball before nightfall, so can I count on your help?” A strange bird slowly glided by from one tree to the other, breaking the previously unnoticed natural silence.

Rey nodded in agreement as the hug was broken, "Always. Come on, let's see if we can get out of here." she smiled, leaving him to lead the way back to the ship. 

After all, he was the expert. Rey would be lying if she said she didn't expect the nightmares to come back, starring opposite self. It wasn't something she could just get over with a simple simulation once over. But, in that moment, she knew that she had the power to fight against becoming that dark and dangerous person she feared.

Slowly marching through the low brush of the swamp in the direction of their crash site, the ground squelching beneath every boot fall. “I know you don’t quite understand what happened back there in that cave, Rey. I do and I can tell you the difference I see.” He had said all this without stopping or turning around to look at her, it was his way of avoiding another awkward interaction. 

Frogs had begun to sing in the lower pools of swamp water around the large roots of the ancient trees. Ben couldn’t tell a soul how he was feeling because he couldn’t even describe it. There was a good reason for why he had decided to leave Rey abruptly before and now he was only seeing the consequences of sticking with her. Just ahead and barely visible through the trees and brush was the black shape of a shuttle jutting near vertically out of the swamp. “We’re close.”

"I know you said not to fear," Rey said as she stayed close to him, keeping an eye out just in case. Maybe she was paranoid that the vision of her darker self would come back and finish her, or Ben. Or maybe it was just a habit she had developed over many years of taking care of herself. Always watching her back, making sure no one was out to get her. 

"But I did...I was terrified. And confused...how does it know what I'm afraid of?" she asked as they finally came to the swamp where they could see some of the shuttle peeking out.

After a moment of thoughtful silence the two stepped out onto the bank of the swampy lake where the back half of the shuttle jutted an easy twenty feet into the air. Ben turned and met Rey’s eyes with his own, a serious expression only amplified by the sadness that hid in his eyes. “It knew you were afraid because it is you. He took a breath before making his best attempt at wisdom. “You went in there to combat your own fear, your own doubt. Whatever you saw in there was a part of you. For better or worse.”

Rey was taken aback a bit by the look in his eyes. Whatever he had seen in there...it must've really scared him. She wanted to ask what he had seen and perhaps comfort the Supreme Leader, but they had to focus on getting the shuttle out of the swamp.

The dark Jedi turned to the shuttle with arms crossed over his chest; he was in great thought when the only possible solution he liked came to mind. “We need to lift it.” He said disappointedly.

"I have energy to use the Force. We're pretty powerful together, we'll get it out without much trouble she shrugged, glancing over at him for a moment to make sure he was alright. "You ready?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	13. Sharing Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey connect on a more personal level on the ship, and Ben reveals something about Han's death.

Ben held a steady gaze with Rey as he lifted an arm with her to level with the half sunken ship. “Good, this is no easy task.” The son of Han took a moment to himself like a silent prayer and nodded to her before closing his eyes and straining through the force to lift the shuttle craft. Ben knew she was strong, but just how strong was she? With eyes closed but mind and body focused on the ship he lifted with all his might. There was nothing left to do but channel the energies surrounding him in the force.

The weight of the ship wasn't something that Rey thought about until now. It was as if the ship were on top of her as she used the Force to try and get it out of the swamp. This was a bit of a surprise to her for sure, but it only gave her more incentive to get the shuttle out. Suddenly, the weight had been lifted off of her and Rey opened her eyes. The shuttle was out of the swamp, floating in mid-air. 

"Ben, look!" Rey exclaimed as she started to try and guide the ship back on land.

As Rey would look over at the dark Jedi she would see him straining with teeth gritted and muscles tensing as a single bead of sweat fell. “N-no!” 

In a slow drift as though time itself had slowed down the shuttle floated back towards the water, now right side up it sunk back into the murky water and mud as it came to rest. Ben let go and the large shuttle creaked as it settled, water and even the occasional fish pouring out of intakes and engines alike. 

“No Rey... You can’t do that.” He slowly approached her from where his boots had sunk a few inches in the soft ground. His chest rose and fell in bursts as he tried to regain his breath, a broad hand coming down on her shoulder. “To admire like that is vain, and vanity is a property of the dark side. Resist the urge to admire next time. I was struggling.” Finishing his speech with a sigh, the youngest Solo headed towards the ship and leapt on top with the force, struggling to open a circular hatch in the flat roof.

Rey was a bit taken back by his words. She thought she was doing right...and she didn't see him struggling. She thought that the Force was a sight to behold, finding it astonishing in any form. But to hear that that wonder and amazement could turn her to the dark side? It was hard for her to accept that she could be vain in that aspect, but Ben was right. 

"Right...sorry." the young woman said quietly, following behind him and attempting to help him open the hatch quickly. Fortunately, the hatch opened, and Rey made sure that Ben got inside before she did, just in case. The gnawing feeling of guilt and shame grew in the pit of her stomach, leaving her feeling cold and slightly afraid. "...Are you alright now? Is there anything I can do to help?" she inquired.

Ben slipped quietly into one of the seats and began pressing a number of buttons and keying in numbers to screens that he was surprised still worked. He sighed while wiping his face. 

“I’m sorry..” He looked up to meet her eyes and solemn expression as he looked embarrassed a little. “What I said. They’re not my words. Luke told me that once but I don’t really believe them myself.” Ben’s shoulders slumped as only a few of the ship’s systems came online. 

After sighing again from the sheer bad luck he found himself in, he now had to ask the woman he nearly didn’t dare to call his pupil. “How much do you know about rewiring comm systems and an ignition coupler?” The fallen Jedi’s only hope for not finding a permanent living on the swamp planet was now the very same woman had taken prisoner and interrogated close to a year ago now.

"Don't worry, I understand. And I know just about everything." Rey replied with a small smile in acknowledgement and acceptance of his apology. "Scavenging and finding different ships, reading up on them for years teaches you a bit." she shrugged, looking at the control panel and examining it with a furrowed brow. 

"Do you have any tools on here?" she asked, looking back over at Ben. "I might need some electrical tape when it comes to this, it helps keep the wires from fraying and becoming vulnerable to water. I might need some wire clippers as well, and a wrench."

The young Solo felt relieved to hear Rey’s understanding of his position and how he felt, but what really got to him was just how much she knew about the complicated systems of a ship. 

“Yes, there’s some tools around here, but I have just one question for you.” Ben clambered out of the seat and headed for one of the few storage bins hidden away inside the wall of the sleeping area. As he pulled out tool after tool he spoke up again. “For being a scavenger, one that picks and pulls apart, how do you know so much about how things go back together?” He walked back over and showed the handful of tools, some being the exact item requested and others being obvious alternatives.

"Well, I started scavenging when I was young." Rey began to explain as she took each tool, placing them near her. "And well, I had time. I was fascinated by machinery and how things worked, so every time I would take something apart, I would see if I could put it back together. I also needed to know if I was getting ripped off when I would sell parts, because if I knew what they were good for, I would know if I'm being scammed." she explained, unscrewing the control panel with ease, looking at the wiring. 

There were a few frayed and disconnected wires, so Rey took the tape and started to get everything sorted out. 

"When I couldn't sleep, I would go out and find anything I could, take it apart, and put it back together until I could. When I'd..." she paused for a moment, thinking before speaking again. "When I would wait outside my home for my parents to come back...I had to occupy myself somehow."

Almost as if out of the blue Ben had a hand on Rey’s shoulder as she mentioned her parents and her tone changed. The dark robed man was on his knees beside her looking in her eyes then back at the wires she held. 

“You ought to be careful, those wires are live after all.” He took the two ends she didn’t have in her hands and twisted them together to repair the broken circuit. Their bodies were close and their faces closer, but before anything happened he broke eye contact and nodded at the wires she still held. “Better hurry it up.” He hated and loved those silent moments between them, like in the elevator aboard the Supremacy. “I will check the readouts.” He said before standing up and sitting in the nearby chair.

The tension between them had her almost short of breath. He was so close, but he looked away. Looking back at what she was supposed to be doing, Rey took a deep breath, trying to refocus. 

"Alright, I'll have it fixed up in a few." she promised, taking another piece of electrical tape and fixing another wire, another screen managing to light up. Grinning to herself proudly, Rey quickly got to work on the ignition coupler. But no matter how hard she tried to focus, that silent moment remained in her mind. It was almost out of one of her dreams, the way he looked at her. He was almost infuriating.

While his expression was stone cold and his regrets boiled up just under the surface, Ben had things he wished to say and do but would only have the strength if the universe began to burn out in that very moment. 

“If you can’t get it working that’s fine, but our only alternative for getting out of here isn’t that pleasant.” Slight worry had crept into the dark Jedi’s voice as he warned Rey, the future was truly uncertain and dark. After rebooting the comm systems it showed several possible targets for an SOS, but doing something like that was less than preferable.

"I've almost got it, Ben, just have some patience." Rey assured him from under the control system, finding the issue with the ignition coupler almost immediately. 

"Aha!" she declared, reaching in and taking out what seemed to be broken branches that got in while they were making their turbulent descent. Getting the panel screwed back in, Rey emerged from underneath, a look of relief on her face. "Now try it."

Ben had to hold his tongue with Rey if he didn’t want their time together to become a confrontational mess. Watching the chunk of wood fly out from beneath the panel was a little concerning but Solo was happy to keep trying. The engine that had been completely submerged only minutes ago sputtered and whined to life. Louder than before but not unbearably so. 

“Do you really think this will work?” Uncertainty rampant in his tone. The readouts across the panel read that everything was working more or less like it had before the crash and nothing had caught fire.

Instead of answering his question, Rey decided to counter it with one of her own as she got in the passenger's seat, buckling herself in. "Do you trust me?" she asked Ben, her eyes locking with his. 

Hazel met dark brown, the eye contact only a reflection of their strong connection. Rey had learned through this journey to trust Ben, but had he learned the same? Or was this trust merely one-sided, no doubt leaving Rey vulnerable in their interactions. Ben hesitated but met her eyes and saw the doubt and fear there again. 

“Yes.. I think you’re one of the few in the galaxy I can trust whether you’re my enemy or my ally.” The elder force user lost his ability to speak as his mouth went dry. The dark robed man broke eye contact and began punching in commands for a new and less humid destination. 

“Where should we go? Back to Yavin or maybe somewhere else?” To trust the poster child of those who called him their enemy was a bolder move than most he’d ever made, but risks had to be taken if he were to ever grow wiser.

"Yavin...for now. Perhaps it could be a safe haven of sorts for us from here on." Rey said, her gaze not breaking from him. "I know that there are times when I just need to leave Ajan Kloss. And I can't imagine what it's like with the First Order..." 

Her attention had turned back to the saber in her hands. The craftsmanship was incredible. And it admittedly made her like it more, the fact that she and Ben had fixed it together. 

"Finn and Poe have been getting pretty close...sometimes I think they don't even need me around." she chuckled. "They're great, they really are. Sometimes I just feel like I don't belong there." Why was she telling him this? Even without prompting her, she was spilling her secrets that she hadn't even verbalized to her friends. "Sorry, that was...too much, you didn't ask to hear that." she apologized.

Ben nodded quietly before making his own side comment to show he was really listening. “The First Order is worse than you can imagine... No one but the high command knows this, but..” Ben Solo took a moment and sighed as his shoulders fell, his position in the seat slumped a little. 

“The command structure is fracturing because sides are being taken now that Snoke hasn’t been around to hold them together.” Ben pulled back on the yoke and the shuttle struggled a little but managed to begin gaining altitude. “Now for the hardest part. I need you to keep what I’ve told you in confidence or it could hurt innocent people on other worlds.” The older yet fallen Jedi felt fractured to the core, he was divulging top secrets to the enemy and even helping them, yet whatever he felt he could not betray it either. “Now we’re even.”

"I won't tell a soul." Rey promised, the corners of her lips turning upwards slightly seeing that he trusted her with such information. "Besides...I wouldn't want to betray your trust." she added, yawning a bit and rubbing her eyes. 

"Thanks for everything back on Dragobah...and before that. I know we're on completely different sides and being like this is...scary. But I'm glad if anyone were to guide me, that it was you." she said, quietly, looking down at her lap as she leaned a bit against the side of the ship. Fighting her own self, plus lifting the shuttle had taken a lot out of her. When perhaps she could rest when they landed on Ajan Kloss.

Ben just sort of shrugged at being thanked but he knew it was all because of some unknown feelings and a debt he felt he owed her. 

“Leia would be able to do some of these things, to teach you but.. No, I shouldn’t go there. That’s for her to tell you.” The shuttle continued for the atmosphere as slowly as before and the dark Jedi looked increasingly tense as the ship wobbled on what little power it had. 

“Thanks though, I know I’m not a great teacher like Luke or Yoda but as long as you think I’m doing well.” Ben felt a little embarrassed to hear Rey word it like she did, it sounded a tad personal and he felt like that was territory never before trekked upon. All in all it was a little bit of a relief to know Rey also found all this a bit terrifying. Breaking the silence between them, Ben spoke up with concern. “Do you think the hyperdrive will work?”

As Ben mentioned hyperdrive, Rey couldn't help but remember that time when she was on the Millennium Falcon with Finn, Han, and Chewie. The immense pride that she felt when she was able to bypass the compressor. The scavenger grinned, "Yeah, I think it should be alright." she nodded. 

Even though Han was gone, perhaps one day, Rey could fly the Millennium Falcon with Ben. "I remember one time, I was on the Falcon. We had to move fast and I bypassed the compressor...the look on Han's face was priceless." she chuckled to herself.

As it was a little easier for Ben to feel a little more at ease with everything Rey told him, the corners of his mouth came up a little, barely forming a smile until his late father was mentioned. 

“I.. What happened to Han was all my fault.. I needed his help and he gave it. I still regret what happened.” His head sunk and through the Force it was clear as day the darkness that followed such thoughts and feelings. Like being soaked with water the darkness never truly left him.

Rey wasn't expecting this confession from Ben. She expected an eye roll, or maybe even some comment about how it probably was a bad idea to do what she did, but to hear him admit his mistakes? It made her pause for a moment. 

"...I wouldn't say it was all your fault." Rey said carefully, looking up from her lap and over to him. "At that point...you were convinced it was either him or you. Survival instinct. While I won't say it was right, I also won't say that it was all your fault. Snoke played a role in it too." she said, reaching over and placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, squeezing it gently. "But regret is a good sign. It means you care. And that's not a bad thing."   
Pain was abundant in Ben’s expression as he slammed a closed fist on the panel, his voice weakening. “Han helped me ignite the blade that I held because he knew what had to happen!” 

The fallen Jedi stood up abruptly and headed for the small cargo hold to the rear, mumbling something about notifying about the hyperdrive. The door hissed closed and silence filled the cabin as the ground continued to shrink below the shuttle. The dark Jedi went about going over the still intact cargo to keep from thinking too much.

The information had Rey frozen, trying to process what she had just heard. Han had activated the saber so Ben wouldn't have to do it alone? It sounded like him, but the mere fact left a pain in her chest, almost as if she could feel a small fraction of the guilt that Ben felt. She couldn't imagine feeling the full of it every day. Rey wanted to get up and follow Ben, make sure he was alright. But he needed time alone, she figured. So she moved over to the pilot's seat, making sure everything was running smoothly as she tried to resist running after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	14. Calling in the Big Guns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben's ship has been considerably damaged. Enough for them to require a little back-up.

The equipment was mostly intact and all the rations and medical supplies were untouched in their packaging. Ben tried to meditate but the constant rocking of the limping shuttle combined with his overwhelming emotions was too much a distraction. 

The door hissed open and the fallen Jedi brought a weight with him, like chains and an anchor. “I only came up here because of the ship..” he mumbled quietly as he sulked almost like a child. “Is the hyperdrive ready?”

Rey looked up at Ben, his voice sounding defeated. It wasn't mad, or frustrated or rage, it was...hurt. He was hurting, and she had no clue how to fix it. She just had to bring up Han and bring all of this to the surface, but wasn't that better than keeping everything bottled up? 

"Yes, It's ready." she responded, her volume matching his, her voice softer and gentler. "...are you going to be alright?"

Trying not to sound like an injured dog begging for help, Ben made solid eye contact and responded in kind. “Yes. Now let’s get underway before anything else happens.” Truly wanting to put the moment behind him, Ben Solo unknowingly pulled a move consistent with Han. “Here goes nothing..” He pushed the switch forward and the hyperdrive died with a whine, other systems also coming offline in tandem. 

“What?!” Was all the surprised force user was able to say before a small explosion rocked the ship from the rear as the cargo hold was vented into the vacuum. 

“I know what I’ve said before even if you don’t know it, but next time I’m picking the ship I will fly, not a bunch of know it all officers.” He slumped back in his seat as the crippled shuttle began drifting in space, moving slowly away from the swamp planet. “Ideas?”

Rey thought for a moment, trying to come up with an idea, "Honestly, I think we need to give the ship a bit of a break." the scavenger replied. "Give it a while to warm up after the crash, let it drift for a little. Then I can see if there's anything else that needs to be fixed." 

She looked back over at Ben, trying to read his expression in response to her words. "All I know is that we both are going to need to get some rest sooner or later. You look exhausted, and that's not going to make things any easier for you." she sighed, leaning back in her chair a bit.

Being the stubborn son of Leia and Han, Ben completely disagreed with the idea of waiting for the damaged shuttle to possibly be flyable, so without another word he began calculating something with the long range communications array.

“How long do you think it will take for reinforcements to arrive?” Ben feigned a confident grin to Rey as he pulled out the communicator and prepared to signal for help. He really wished this wasn’t the plan he had to follow through.

Rey's eyes widened. "Are you insane? What if someone sees us? That's putting both of us, but mostly you in danger." she said, more so worried about the First Order finding out that Ben was helping her. 

"We're both recognizable...so how are we going to flag someone down without them finding out? I'm pretty sure I've got a bounty on my head from the First Order as it is." she pointed out, crossing her arms. As nice as it was to see him smile, this plan could get them both in trouble.

Rey was beyond right to call him insane, just the basic risks alone of calling out into open space could attract any number of undesirables. 

“What choice do we really have? Look at the readouts..” half the ships readouts flashed red or weren’t lit up at all. Ben put back down the communicator and started pacing back and forth just behind the seats. “You have to know how to contact a neutral friend.” Concern began creeping into his voice as he wracked his brain for any way out.

Rey sighed, getting up and beginning to pace back and forth, wracking her brain for anyone who would possibly be able to help and not turn the both of them in. This itself was difficult, because the only people Rey was in contact with was the Resistance. And the Resistance...well, was looking to hide away and destroy the First Order. That's when it hit her...General Organa. She knew that Rey was on some sort of 'retreat'...and if she were to find out about Ben...she wouldn't want to turn in her own son. Not if Rey explained how close she was getting to getting through to him. 

"...You're not going to like what I'm going to suggest, but it's the best I've got." she said.

It took a moment before the sound of the heavy footfalls of the dark Jedi stopped in place before he swiveled on a heel. The force bond between them wasn’t quite so powerful but he could tell something was up, like a sudden change in the wind. “Go ahead...” Ben said apprehensively, stepping forward to place a hand on the back of the seat he had been in minutes ago.

Taking a deep breath before speaking again, Rey told Ben of her idea. "...I think we need to contact General Organa.”

Ben’s expression instantly became one of concerned confusion at the mention of his mother. “I will not sit here while my mother comes to our rescue..” The black robed man sunk into the chair and held his head in one hand. “Have her send someone. A junker or collector, but nobody that would take notice of me.” In his head Ben Solo absolutely hated the idea, but preferred it to dying in the middle of nowhere in space.

"No one that would take notice of you? Sure, that'll be easy, with a ship from the First Order, along with you wearing your outfit that you literally wear everywhere." Rey said sarcastically, "I hate to break it to you, but it's not going to be able to happen. Your mother is probably the one person who isn't going to turn us in. I know it's hard, Ben, I really do. I don't know the extent, but I have a feeling. You own mother, she wouldn't turn you in like this. I know it." 

Rey tried her best to convince him, try to make him see reason. Seeing him reject his mother instantly honestly made her a bit frustrated. He had a mother who cared about him, no matter what he did, because that's what a good mother does. To Rey, her own mother sold her and left her. So to hear him adamantly refuse had her annoyed.

Ben Solo was stunned for Rey to be verbally laying him back like she was without stopping, or apologizing for being so brutally honest. “My mother knew when I killed Han Solo. Everyone felt it.” Ben didn’t seem angry but his aggressive defense of what he’d done sounded more like disappointment than anything else. “It’s not that she would turn us in or not... it’s that I’m her greatest failure!” Ben sunk back into the seat, the cape he had been wearing having fallen off leaving him in only his tunic now, the flowing fabric piled up on the floor. “Go ahead.. do it.”

"Failure or not...she still loves you." Rey murmured as she sat down once more, patching in to the Resistance communication channel. After a while, Rey was patched through to the General. "General Organa...I'm going to have to ask a big favor of you..." Rey relayed, "I'm safe, but currently in a First Order ship that can no longer go into hyperdrive...and most other systems are offline. Please, don't tell anyone about this. You'll understand when you get here."

There was a brief moment of silence from Leia, as if she were thinking. Rey thought she had lost her when she finally uttered, "I'll be there...stay safe, Rey." The connection was cut, and all that could be heard on the ship was the rattling of the ship. The heating had gone out, and well, the ship was only getting colder by the minute. Rey wrapped her arms around herself, looking over at Ben. She didn't speak, she was just looking for a hint of what Ben was thinking.

Ben sat silently with his head in his hands, trying to not panic or sob as his emotions were going wild with sadness, frustration, and longing. It was at the point that he heard his mother’s voice that he looked up and met Rey’s eyes with shocked silence on his lips. To hear his mother again was almost too much to bear. As the transmission ended and the cabin fell silent again the man with the splintered soul picked his cape up, walked to where Rey sat and draped the heavy, dark fabric over her shoulders before returning to his seat. 

“..Thank you.....” Was all Ben could manage to say.

When Ben got up, Rey expected him to go somewhere else on the ship, still upset with her. So it surprised her greatly when he draped his cape over her shoulders before sitting back down again, only to thank her. 

"Not a problem...w-I mean, she'll always care for you." Rey replied, catching herself mid-sentence. She wrapped the cape tighter around her and over her head, making it look like she had a hood on. "I hope you realize that you're unlikely to get this back now that you've lent it to me...it's surprisingly comfortable."

At the corners of his mouth, a smile nearly forms on Ben’s face, but the weight of the situation suppressed any smile that could come from the otherwise amusing act. “Do I look like I need it?” The dark robed man cocked an eyebrow at the brunette woman, his curiosity growing. Ben sat up and looked out the slowly icing windscreen at the expanse of stars and nebula. “How long do you think it will take?”

"Anywhere from around five hours to a day. Just depends on the checkpoints, and how fast she can get a ship over to us." Rey sighed, "The backup regenerator should be able to keep us warm enough for at least a few days, so we'll be alright, just not as warm as usual." she assured him, "Do you want to talk further about just what has you feeling so panicked, or do you just want to rest?"

The son of Solo seemed calmer than only a minute ago, as if he had been afraid to talk with his mother or even hear her voice again. He nodded to signal that he understood but it was only because his mouth was so dry. Ben met her eyes as the emotional torrent within him exploded into a silent reality. “Why do you care?” He asked more casually and curiously than most would expect. “I have nothing to hide and yet all you can do is ask questions when your own caged mind boils over with secrets and curiosities.” 

That single silent reality was pain, and pain made him powerful, made him stronger.

Ben's question stumped Rey for quite a few moments. Why did she care? Was it because they had this bond? Was it because she saw herself in his own turmoil and fear, and she wanted to help that part of him heal? Possibly, but Rey did genuinely care about Ben. Since her time in the Resistance, Rey was able to let herself be a bit more compassionate and caring about the people around, much more than she was willing to be on her own on Jakku.

Finally, Rey spoke up. "Because if I was hurting as much as you are, I would want somebody to try and understand and help." Still bundled up in Ben's cape, Rey kept her gaze on him to see how he'd react.

Like a stone dropped in the center of a lake, Rey’s words disturbed him from the hateful spiral that he had been pulled into, but in its place left a stinging wound because of just how cruel he could be to someone that just wanted to help him. 

“With the cargo hold gone we have enough supplies to wait maybe twelve hours before the slow effects of starvation and dehydration begin to present themselves. That is however ignoring the possibility of hypothermia or suffocation. Can you reroute the remaining power to reinforce the life support systems only? A shield and weapons isn’t needed nor is a hyperdrive if it’s malfunctioning.” Ben sat up and started messing with the correct controls to redirect power from everything but the hyperdrive to the life support. It seemed to be working but still the ship let some power leak back into the other subsystems.

He ignored her reply, but then again, what could Rey expect from it? "I can do that...besides, I can go a while without food or water." she nodded, having been short of both during her years on the hot and sandy planet of Jakku. 

“Right, I can too, just probably not as long as you can.” Ben watched closely as Rey hot wired multiple ship systems with relative ease, closely studying how the Jakku native worked meticulously. 

Taking control of the life systems, Rey rerouted the rest of the power that held up the shield and kept their weapons powered to the systems that they would need to survive. It took a few minutes for Rey to figure this out, having never piloted a First Order shuttle, but she soon figured it out. "Alright, all set. All we have to do now is wait."

The dark Jedi thought over what he saw and realized there was a major flaw in the construction of the shuttles, something to mention next time he’s back on the deck of a proper star destroyer. “You’re shivering still, have you noticed?” He was slightly concerned for the both of them, but to keep her safe was secretly his highest priority at the moment.

"Just a little, it's fine, nothing I can't handle." Rey brushed off as she sat back in the chair, pulling her knees up to her chest while the cape was still wrapped around her. Her hands were shaking and her teeth chattered slightly. Rey was used to much warmer climates, and her clothes were specifically made for those temperatures. So, to have the temperature drop so suddenly and significantly, Rey had little time to adjust. "What about you? Aren't you cold?"

She couldn’t fool him, Rey was too cold and he knew it. Ben stood up and pulled at a couple fingers of each glove to then pull them off entirely. “Here, these should help.” The young Solo gently took Rey’s shaking right hand and pushed the leather glove on, then moving to her other hand with the same careful touch. Her left hand shook worse so he had to hold her wrist as he carefully pushed the glove on. 

Rey held her breath as Ben took her hand, pushing the glove onto it so she could have a little more insulation from the cold. The gloves were quite big on her, but they worked well enough."T-thank you." Rey managed to stutter, offering a thankful smile in return. 

“Hold your body, your arms and legs will take care of themselves.” Ben knew that with the cargo hold blown out into space that any form of medical or emergency supplies were now far behind them in the vacuum of space. “I’m fine.” Ben sat back down and could feel the chill getting to him, but only enough that he knew it was cold. When one’s majority of adult life is spent aboard a destroyer one gets used to the cold of a ship.

"I..I think I'm going to close my eyes for a bit, if that's alright with you?" Rey said as she leaned back a bit in her seat, her arms wrapped around herself as she remained bundled up in Ben's cape.

No clever reply came from Ben as he was thanked, it wasn’t necessary to waste his breath on a reply at all, so he stuck with something neutral. “Okay.” Multiple points on his body hurt as Ben moved back to his seat, souvenirs of the crash he guessed. There was no telling how long it would take for Leia to arrive so sleeping looked like a perfect idea. Ben shook himself awake as he realized two things, the first being that he would be at someone else’s mercy when their rescue arrived, and the second being that his eyes had already been closed. It took every ounce of willpower to stay awake when his body tried it’s hardest to do what felt natural.

Meanwhile, Rey slept somewhat peacefully for the first time in a while. Warmed by the cape and gloves, remaining curled up in the pilot's seat, the brunette's eyes were closed, a faint smile on her lips. The light of the stars and nebulas casting a silver-ish glow on her faintly freckled face. With no nightmares seeming to plague her at that moment, the woman looked more at peace than she ever was when she was awake. If only it could be like that always, though unfortunately, it would be a long while until Rey could finally let herself be at peace.

Ben struggled to stay awake as Rey slept only a few feet away. The cabin only got colder as each long hour passed to the point where Ben had to carefully pace back and forth to keep blood flowing at the same time he was trying not to wake the scavenger. 

It had been four hours of pacing, waiting, and meditating before a small fleet with accompanying x-wing star fighters jumped into the system with a Mon Cala MC95 starship at its center. The comm systems aboard the shuttle whined without much power to relay a transmission so whatever it was was lost. 

With a last burst of energy Ben walked as fast as he could to the control board and used what little energy it had to flash the landing lights before darkness started to engulf his vision. The fallen Jedi had to sit down or risk collapsing mid rescue. The cold had drained him and probably Rey as well of most heat and energy needed to move around, so the supreme leader of the First Order weakly waited to be saved by his enemy that flew the ship he had personally hunted for weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	15. General Organa Knows All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> General Organa talks with Rey about the fate of Ben.

A few hours had passed since Rey and Ben had been taken to the medical bay on the Mon Cala MC95, and Leia was waiting anxiously for the two to wake up. She hadn't seen her son face-to-face in so long...her beautiful son. She could remember the first time she laid eyes on Ben, and she knew she would always love him. The times when he would talk about wanting to be a pilot just like his father when he was younger...but that's when things changed. As he got older, his power was immeasurable. Doing what she thought would help her son, Leia let him start training under Luke...and now she wondered what would have happened if she never would have sent him.

Rey awoke, now finally warmed up enough. Her eyes opened to the bright lights of the white medical bay, blinking a few times to get adjusted.

The small fleet of ships hung in space over a nebula of mixing gasses from a long dead star. A steady beeping noise was what Ben first recognized as he became conscious, the blinding white light around him forced his eyes closed with a stinging pain. The second thing to register was the humid warmth in the air that was the complete opposite of a star destroyer’s interior atmosphere. 

As he tried to sit up he hit his forehead on a bubble-like covering over his upper half that displayed his vitals on the transparent surface. Ben squinted somewhat as he looked around and sat up in bed to spot Rey across the room. 

The Mon Calamari medical bay was a sterile white series of rooms filled with equipment that seemed to purify everything with it’s lighting alone. Ben swung his legs over the side and saw Rey speaking to Leia on the opposite side of the room. A view port on the wall to his right showed that the fleet was at more of a standstill than anything as he had really expected the blue white lines of hyperspace.

"So...how was the retreat?" Leia asked once Rey was sitting up and looking around the med bay.

The scavenger looked back at the General, unsure of what she should say. Leia was seemingly calm...but then again, she always was. Calm, collected, even in the worst of times. What Rey was having trouble with at that moment, was figuring out how General Organa was reacting to the situation. Was she mad? Disappointed? Disgusted? 

"Good...um...look, I can explain, Ben's not doing anything of concern, I promise, he's actually-"

"Been helping you?" Leia finished Rey's sentence, effectively silencing her. "I had a feeling you two had been in touch. I was concerned at first, but then the First Order seemed to hold back a little bit more. The raids have lowered in numbers drastically." she explained to Rey, who simply nodded in response, unsure of what to say. 

"You two are getting quite close...and while it has the potential for danger, it also holds the potential for much good. I trust you'll be able to help the ladder be the outcome of all this."

"He can be good." Rey quickly spoke, "He really can...someone just needs to give him a chance...someone who understands him."

Leia looked at Rey for a moment, thinking, before she moved closer, sitting down at the edge of Rey's bed, "And do you understand him?" 

Rey looked down at her lap, nodding. "I think I do...I can feel what he feels, if I focus hard enough. He's ...lost. He feels so alone, and I can't just not try to help him. The small glimpses I see...Ben Solo can be redeemed. He just needs someone to not turn away."

Seeing how Rey spoke about Ben, Leia put her hand over Rey's, causing her to look up at the General. 

"Rey, I still want you to be careful. I'm not upset that you're with Ben, I'm upset that you are doing so under the guise of being alone. It's dangerous, for the both of you. But I trust that you can do this...you are incredibly strong and intelligent. Don't ever doubt that."

Ben was still immensely groggy and had a rather painful headache for reasons unknown, but he still heard every word spoken and it hit him hard. Finding no reason to stick around any longer, Ben stood up and glanced over at the two women before angrily walking out. 

The unfortunate part of walking freely on the ship of your enemy was that you had no idea where anything actually was located, so naturally Ben started walking down the long hallway just off the medical center in hopes of finding a hanger with a suitable ship. Another small but still unfortunate fact was that Ben’s own lightsaber had gone missing, probably taken from him during the rescue.

Rey's face fell as she saw Ben get up and storm out, looking to Leia for guidance. She wanted to go after him, to try and explain. Seeing how Rey pleaded without any words, Leia gave her a nod. Immediately, despite her aching muscles, Rey got up out of the bed and started going after him.

"Ben, wait!" she called after him once she spotted him going down the long and narrow hallway. She ran to catch up with him, only to almost slip and fall due to her shoes being removed before she was placed in the bed, her socks sliding along the polished floor.

Ben turned right as Rey approached him and grabbed her arm, helping the poor woman stabilize herself to keep from falling flat on her face. 

“What? Why is it that she won’t look at me?” Without giving Rey a second to reply Ben continued to rant. “They took my lightsaber, Rey. My only means of defense and I’ve been stripped of it.” His blood boiled and he nearly continued down the hallway without giving Rey a moment to speak but the look she gave him held the young Solo in place. “Why?” 

The anger was instantly replaced with pain that flooded into his heart and tightened his throat. Sorrow was not an emotion he had conquered in his tutelage under Snoke.

Rey's mind was racing, trying to think of something to say. He looked so hurt...and that hurt her as well. Looking around, Rey found an empty room that was usually used to store droids that needed repairs and punched in a code to the keypad outside of it, the door sliding open. She took Ben's hand, guiding him into the room where she found a few crates to sit down on, the door sliding shut behind them.

"Ben...you don't need defense here." Rey started to speak, gentle and careful. "There is no need for you to have a saber while you're in a hospital bed. They took mine too...and as for your mother...she's scared." she stated factually. "She's scared of failing you...she loves you, she really does. You have no clue how guilty she's felt during all of this...she doesn't know what you think of her right now."

Ben was still disgruntled but allowed Rey to pull him away and out of sight, the crates of supplies made for awful seats, but it felt better than standing at the moment. 

“Firstly.. I..I don’t understand why they would disarm you other than to make me feel better, which it isn’t! Secondly She doesn’t trust me because of what she thinks I did to dad! I failed her Rey! She never failed me...” Ben collapsed back on the crate, only then realizing he had risen into a standing position. His heartbeat thumped loudly in his ears as tears threatened to make an appearance. 

The dark Jedi knew he would have revealed their secret meeting location to everyone close by from his sorrow alone. “There is no hope for me... Rey of Jakku..” The young Solo slipped to the floor with his back to a crate and his head in his hands.

Rey watched on as Ben recounted his thoughts, and from what he said, it was partially true. He did have his saber taken away as a precaution, but only from the behavior the Resistance had seen from him as of late. They hadn't been able to see what Rey had gotten the chance to see. "There's always hope, Ben, but only if you don't give up on yourself." she finally spoke as she knelt down by his side, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Look, you are exhausted. I am too. And dwelling on all of this while you are tired is only going to get you worked up even more. From what I know, and from what I've seen, there is more than enough hope for you." Rey said, hoping that at least some of what she said could get through to Ben in his state.

Rey always proved him terribly wrong. Any time Ben thought his hate would consume him again and it really looked as though it would, The scavenger from Jakku cut through the blinding pain of the enclosing darkness and showed him the light again. It was uncanny how she could do it where no one else could. After taking a few deep breaths with his eyes shut tight, Ben met Rey’s gaze and he knew what had to happen. 

“Let’s go back to the med bay, I need more rest.” 

As Ben Solo tried to stand his head felt light and cold as he nearly passed out. “Help me up will you?” Ben grunted as he tried using the crate behind him as leverage to stand. The outburst had left him weak and tired, and the force was of no help there.

Draping one of his arms over both of her shoulders, Rey helped Ben to his feet. Pressing the button next to the door, it slid open, letting them go through and make their way to the med bay once more. On their way however, a faint beeping and whirring could be heard from behind them. Turning her head to look, Rey smiled as she saw BB-8 roll around to her side.

"Missed me, huh?" she said to the droid, who beeped happily in return. "Tell Finn and Poe that I promise I'll talk to them later, okay?" BB-8 gave her a nod and one last beep before going back from where he came, on his way to tell Finn and Poe that their friend would be alright. Ben couldn’t understand the droid and was in fact puzzled that Rey did at all. With a weak voice as they headed back to the medical wing, he commented. “I don’t understand how you understand that ball.” 

They made it to the med bay, and Rey helped Ben over to his bed, "Get some rest...we can talk more when you wake up." she promised.

Leia was no longer in the med bay and it didn’t change how the dark Jedi felt, this fact actually affected him more than to find his mother had gone elsewhere on the ship. “I doubt rest will come to me on this flying fish bowl.” Ben laid down anyway.

Rey stifled a laugh at his description of the ship, "You'd be surprised," was all she said before leaving his side to lay down on her own bed. She couldn't help but wonder how she would explain this situation to her friends, figuring that 'Hey, I've been sneaking off to go see the leader of the First Order who I've maybe grown an attraction to' was the wrong way to approach it.  So, Rey decided to close her eyes and sleep on it, hoping that once she was well rested, the answers she needed would become clear.

Rey’s counter comment to his rather rude observation of the Mon Cala cruiser intrigued Ben to a point of fascination once more. The scavenger girl amused him at the same time she was insufferably kind, unlike all others around him. The dark Jedi felt confused as he slipped into a restful sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	16. Ben's Choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben makes a decision that could break Rey's heart.

_ Ben entered the bridge of his personal star destroyer, the Finalizer, and unlike it’s usual hum of business there didn’t look to be anybody anywhere, not even down in the crew pits on either side of the main walkway. That was when he noticed her. A woman in black flowing robes stood a couple feet from the triangular forward view screen of the bridge, looking out at the scattering of stars. _

_ "Who are you?" The dark Jedi spoke calmly as he approached with a cautious pace. The feminine figure was hooded but her voice chilled Ben Solo to the bone.  _

_ "I’m your empress.. don’t you remember?" The question Rey asked as she turned to look the other fallen Jedi in the eyes. The Jakku native’s body was clothed with only a sheer black dress that had to have been lighter than a feather. Black cloth wrappings covered her chest and lower region, but even that left little to the imagination.  _

_ “Isn’t this what you wanted?” The intimidatingly sexy woman dropped the hooded cloak that was really the only covering she wore and began walking barefoot towards Ben.  _

_ “No.. this isn’t right.” This dark Rey’s lips curled in a smile as she stood only inches from the Supreme Leader and her hand touched lightly on the chest of his robes before moving lower and grabbing the hilt of the lightsaber that hung from his belt.  _

_ “This is mine now!” Dark Rey spat with a venomous tone before the crimson blade ignited- _

Ben Solo awoke gasping for air in a cold sweat from his dream. His thoughts swelled on the woman he spotted across the room and he was relieved to see her still the normal Rey he had known. His heart was nearly beating out of his chest as he tried to sit up in the bed.

Rey hadn't been able to sleep unfortunately, but she had been laying in her bed, her eyes closed. She opened them upon hearing Ben mumbling in his sleep, saying something about how something wasn't right. This concerned the young woman, and she sat up. Thankfully, Ben opened his eyes right as she started making her way over to him, "Are you alright?" Rey asked, clearly worried about the young man who looked like he'd just seen a ghost.

Ben looked horrified as he wiped sweat from his face and found tears in his eyes as his breathing calmed to a mostly normal pace. He was quite relieved to see Rey, her eyes not the same sickly red and yellow as his dream. 

Speaking so quietly he was almost mumbling, Ben said. “I saw it Rey..” In fear of frightening the young woman he decided to hold his tongue further. “Yeah. I-I’m fine.” The disturbed man got up slowly and walked to the window where he looked out into the universe. Desperate to change the subject he had brought up, Ben asked Rey without looking at her. “Do you know where we’re headed?” He leaned against the white plasteel of the wall, somewhat bored. 

Flashes and moments of the dream played in his head. The star destroyer had been his, the bridge was set up the same way and it mostly had just felt like his own ship. Of course there were other parts of the dream that he found strange but what stood out most was that Rey called her his ’Empress’. Ben’s thoughts were interrupted by the presence of the real Rey.

Rey froze as she saw the tears in Ben's eyes...the way he uttered what he was so afraid of. Or rather, what he wasn't admitting he was afraid of, but Rey could guess. As a few tears fell down Ben's cheek, Rey gently wiped them away with her thumb, her brows furrowed with concern. "No...I don't know where we're headed...but what did you see?" she asked, sitting on the edge of his bed. She saw the way he was looking at her, almost like he was examining her to see if she was real. Rey understood that after many nightmares herself, but what could've possibly been so frightening?

Fear still chilled his bones as the dark Jedi avoided Rey’s questioning in a bid to protect his feelings rather than open up to the woman that was actively trying to help him. 

“For the only Jedi aboard this cruiser it seems you are more of a prisoner than a hero to them..” Ben knew running away was no option and neither was fighting, so he told her what she wanted to hear. 

“I saw you Rey, clothed in black with darkness in your heart.” A push for false confidence was his only hope that the scavenger wouldn’t ask any more of the dream, especially because there were things that he feared to tell her about.

“I must visit with my mother.” Ben’s eyes darted away and quickly met Rey’s again. “Just because she is afraid doesn’t mean I am.” The dark Jedi knew he was a prisoner even without being in a cage and without at least a message the First Order might brand him a traitor just for the power that self promotion would bring.

It felt like someone had poured ice cold water down her back, her face turning pale, making her light freckles more prominent. 

"You saw her?" Rey asked, completely glossing over his needing to visit with General Organa. How was her darker self in his dreams now? Was it part of their connection? Could their dreams collide without either of them intending to intrude? "What did she do? Where were you?" Rey rambled, needing to know more information about this 'Dark Rey'.

Just as Rey was trying to get more information, Leia entered the med bay, "Rey?" she said, making the young Jedi quickly get up from Ben's bedside, turning to look at the General. "Can I ask you to leave the room for a while? I'd like to speak with my son."

Ben kept his eyes out the window, but physically tensed and straightened up when his mother’s voice was heard. Even after all those years the authority a mother’s voice carried had not weaned over the years. 

“I’ll talk to you later.” Was Ben’s only response to the scatter shot of questions his pseudo pupil had thrown his way. 

As Rey left the room he followed her with his eyes and nodded just before she pressed the button to shut the door, but he could still see her there, just not with his eyes. 

“Mother..” Ben said calmly as he slowly approached the elderly woman. It almost physically hurt to be so close his own mother after all he had done, but no amount of pain could stop him now. “What did you come to say?”

It was hard for Leia to look at her son in that moment. The scar that ran along the side of his face was prominent, given to him by the scavenger that had just been in the room moments before. But what it had required to arrive at that moment in time, Leia only blamed herself and Han. When Ben was young, she noticed how in tune he was with the Force, and how dangerous it could quickly become. So, she sent him off with Luke, her trusted brother, to try and help him hone his abilities. Little did she know at the time that it would make him vulnerable to the tempting taunts from Snoke.

What had happened to her little, dark haired, smiling boy? Leia closed her eyes for a moment to compose herself again, looking up at her son. 

"I'm sorry, Ben. I've missed you." she said simply, at a loss for words.

He watched her, he watched Leia stand there in emotional pain because he had no cure for guilt. Ben had a reply, but it stung to utter the words because of the unspoken hurt and guilt between mother and son. 

“I missed you too mother..” Those words hung in the air almost like they had never reached Leia. The dark Jedi slowly crossed the room to stand nearly five feet from the highly celebrated woman that he had the honor to call his mother. “I don’t deserve your kindness. We both know this.” Ben’s voice quivered as he spoke, his eyes were wet and stung with tears that had yet to fall. “What is to become of me?” His voice now barely a whisper.

General Organa reached forward, taking her son's hands in her own. "That part depends on you, Ben." she said gently. 

Only Ben could decide if he would finally step out of the dark and into the light. Leia couldn't make that decision for him, like when she decided he was to be trained by Luke. As much as she would have liked to be able to tell her son that he was to remain with the Resistance, she knew it wasn't possible if Ben didn't make the choice himself. 

"You can come home and work to earn the trust of the Resistance back. Or....you can go back to the First Order."

One of the tears finally rolled out of his eyes. His mother had a kind heart but could not possibly understand what he must do. “I didn’t expect you to forgive me before and I don’t expect you to forgive me this time either...” More tears rolled down his cheeks as he remained silent for a moment, his throat was closed up with sadness because he hated to leave. “I can be more helpful on the other side.. Wait for my signal and I need you to be there for Rey while I’m gone.” Ben’s sad eyes met his mother’s again and he croaked out a final plea. “Please mom.”

“Go. We will wait for you.” The princess of Alderaan hugged her son closely and he hugged her back, but it felt foreign to Ben regardless of it; he still felt a little better about his mission ahead. Leia held her son out at length to look him in the eyes. “Be safe Ben, come back to me.” The fallen Jedi nodded silently to his mother as she withdrew his saber hilt from her robes, handing the blackened weapon to him. Ben knew what had to be done next as he ran out the door the General had entered, as she sat down on one of the medical beds and sobbed quietly. 

It was Ben’s mission now to make his way to the hanger and a ship he could take back to his First Order fleet. The most difficult part would be avoiding Rey and her friends.

Ben sprinted down the most isolated hall he could find before being spotted by technicians or droids. The hanger was nearby if his memory of the maps served him correctly. Sweat was forming on his brow and back from the increased activity and the humidity of the ship’s interior as service tunnels were the fastest if not the most uncomfortable form of travel.

As Ben neared the port side hanger cluster he heard movement ahead, and the fallen Jedi noticed a technician fixing some sort of electrical panel. Carefully Ben picked a bolt off the floor and used the force to drop it on the opposite side of the small room to take the young woman’s attention away from his side. A Haysian smelt medallion hung from the woman’s neck as Ben snuck by to a service stairwell.

Rose heard the sound of a bolt dropping, but then the sound of footsteps. quickly turning her head, she managed to see a blur of black running past. There wasn't supposed to be anyone but her on this area of the ship.

"Hello?" Rose called out.

Ben stopped mid pace as he was caught and turned quickly with an open hand outstretched. “I was never here and your current task is very important.” The Force was a powerful ally but there was a moment of hesitation before the dark robed man waited to see if his power took hold on the woman. 

Ben stopped mid pace as he was caught and turned quickly with an open hand outstretched.  _ “I was never here and your current task is very important.” _ The Force was a powerful ally but there was a moment of hesitation before the dark robed man waited to see if his power took hold on the woman. 

Rose's eyes widened upon seeing the Supreme Leader. She'd never seen him this close before. With that small moment of hesitation, the Force was proved to not have worked on the mechanic, but she knew what she was doing. 

"You were never here and my current task is very important." she repeated, turning to pretend to go back to work.

Ben felt something off, something elsewhere but also.. familiar. He nodded at his handiwork before taking the stairwell down, avoiding more guards on the way down another hall with hanger markings on the other end. The hanger Ben Solo was headed for coincidentally held a few X-wing star fighters and only a couple troopers guarding them.

He climbed down a ladder into the hanger on the far side where the rebellion era dressed guards were situated on either side of the door. The fallen Jedi used the force to open one of the fighter’s cockpits as he climbed up into the seat without a helmet or flight suit. Now the tricky part was trying to get the darn thing started from a complete shutoff mode.

Now that Kylo Ren was out of sight, Rose dropped her tools and immediately starting running down the many hallways, trying to find her friends. It wasn't in their best interests to be causing a panic, hence why Rose decided against telling everyone she could come across.

Ben continued to try and unlock the X-wing from it’s current place in the hanger when he noticed the fuel line was still hooked up. Nearly diving out of the cockpit, Solo turned off the fuel pump and unhooked the tube before climbing back in with the determination to figure out such a complex fighter.

Knowingly alerting the guards, Ben powered on the engines and started to taxi to the open center of the hanger. As the snub fighter lined up with the exit two things happened in quick succession. The one of the two confused guards that wasn’t uselessly shouting at the ship in the air hit a number of switches on a master control panel. The second thing to happen was Rey appeared in his vision as the X-wing took off, and the dark Jedi could have sworn he saw her actually enter the hanger in that last moment. The hyperdrive was quick to calculate before jumping for First Order space where a pick up would be necessary.

Determination won over grief as the snub fighter jumped to it’s first of few hyperspace jumps on it’s way back to First Order space. Ben tried to send comfort through the connection him and Rey shared but it was like shouting into the void as this connection was still a confusing blessing to the fallen Jedi. 

Ben Solo spent hours cooped up in the tight cockpit of the X-wing so long his neck and back were sore after exiting, so he ordered it to be left behind in space with it’s distress pulser activated for any unlucky soul to find such a ridiculous little ship. The bridge of his personal starship disturbed him as the dream had become horribly specific in seemingly every detail of the otherwise boring command center. It was time to work his master plan from it’s start in General Hux.

Back on the MC95 cruiser, Leia commanded the ship through hyperspace back to Ajan Kloss as both her and Ben had missions to complete.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	17. Friends Reunited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn, Poe, and Rey talk about the secrets she's been keeping from them.

Rey was sitting in one of the many rooms that were more commonly used for the crew when they would take breaks. She decided against waiting right outside the med bay, knowing she would want to listen in on the private conversation. Her solution was to simply remove herself from the situation. But that was easier said than done. Her mind was racing, a million questions running through it. What was she supposed to say to her friends now that they most likely knew what she had been doing? What was General Organa talking to Ben about, and what was going to happen to him from here?

Her thoughts were interrupted however, by the sound of the door sliding open. Standing in the doorway, were Finn and Poe, with BB-8 right behind them. She had missed the three of them while on her adventures, and she didn't like lying to them about what she was doing. But now, it was time to face the music.

"We've been looking everywhere for you." Finn finally spoke up as he stepped into the room, making his way over to the couch across from her as BB-8 beeped in agreement, quickly rolling over to the solemn-looking girl and bumping into her leg, getting a hint of a smile out of her.

Poe followed Finn into the break room and let the door slide shut behind him. 

“Finn is mostly right.. we hadn’t searched the engine bay or the weapons deck, but that doesn’t matter because here you are now.” The ace pilot pulled up a chair and sat down across from the scavenger, but his attention was on the back of the room where he spotted a coffee machine that he looked happier to see as he moved to get some caffeine to assist him. 

“So uhh. Where have you been all this time Rey? We’ve been worried sick that even BB-8’s blown a couple fuses.” The coffee machine started brewing while Poe leaned back against the counter with his arms crossed.

Rey bit her lip, tapping her foot anxiously as she tried to come up with an answer that wouldn't cause the two to become upset with her. 

"Well...first we were on Coruscant." Rey finally sighed, leaning over and resting her elbows on her knees, her face in her hands. "Then Yavin 4...then Dragobah...and now here." she said, looking at Poe, Finn and BB-8's faces for any sort of reaction.

Finn raised an eyebrow. He knew that the Supreme Leader was on the ship for unknown reasons, but this information from Rey brought things into a new light. 

"And by 'we', you mean....?" he prompted.

Rey looked down at the ground for a while, the minutes ticking by. "I was with Ben...or Kylo." she finally spoke.

Poe had stayed almost completely silent as he poured a mug of hot caffeinated drink and rejoined the group with a look of curious bewilderment. 

“So you just went gallivanting across the galaxy with that psycho which should I remind you, that he interrogated and tortured me!” 

Now Poe had really shown how he felt and perhaps Rey didn’t deserve to hear the attitude he had spared Leia of only earlier the day before.

"I wasn't gallivanting!" Rey defended back in the break room, "I...we were fixing Luke's saber. And then...he's been helping me. Look, I know it's hard for you to believe, but I am so close to bringing him back to the light." she said, hoping her own first-hand encounter could be heard.

"Helping you? No, no, he's using you, Rey. Sure, he helped you fix the saber. If he really did, he's only doing that to gain your trust, that's how these guys work." Finn said, clearly tense, but trying his best to stay calm. "They get in your head, and they convince you that you need them."

"That's not what I mean! I'm fine, Finn. I can defend myself perfectly well." Rey shot back with a glare.

Poe rolled his eyes and scoffed in annoyance at the story. “It sounds quite a lot like you’re taking a liking to him. How are you sure he won’t turn on us the moment he’s left alone in the med bay?!”

"I'm not! What I do know, is that the thought of me turning to the dark had him terrified." Rey replied stubbornly, "Things happened...he's not as...cold as he seems. There were many times during our time that he could've turned a blind eye to me and he didn't."

Poe seemed rather taken aback, but also less hostile as only a moment before. “I’m only an ace pilot and a commander, so I don’t know all that much about the force or Jedi.. What do you mean when you say things happened? What were you too up to? Because when we found you two floating adrift from some random swamp ball, you were wearing his gloves and his cape..?”

"I already told you what we were up to. We fixed the saber. And....he's helping me with my training. I completed on of the Jedi trials back on Dragobah." Rey explained tiredly. They wouldn't understand...but Ben did. He understood. 

"When I say things happened, I mean he helped me not feel so alone, okay?" The more Rey relayed how Ben helped her, the more she realized how much she cared about him. And that had her terrified. Would her friends grow to hate her? "I get these nightmares all the time... and it always ends bad. I-I end up hurting people...every time I would have one and would be panicking he was there...he-" Rey stopped herself, looking down at the ground and taking a shaky breath. "He held me. Let me cry...and I finally didn't feel so alone anymore." she spoke quietly.

To say Finn was taken aback was definitely an understatement. To think that the Supreme Leader showed genuine care for Rey baffled him. In his mind, Kylo Ren was unable to show that kind of compassion, it just wasn't in his blood. Then again, one of his best friends was talking about how he had helped her...and he didn't want to not believe her. "Rey..." he sighed, unsure of what else to say.

Poe looked absolutely confused and concerned all at the same time, one of his long time friends and ally’s in the fight against the First Order was talking good about the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. The pilot sighed and put up his hands in defeat. 

“I don’t know what to say or think Rey.. what is going on..? Do you feel well?” Poe had nearly forgotten about the mug in his hand and was ultimately lost for words as nothing made sense. “C’mon Finn, don’t tell me any of this makes sense to you?”

"I'm fine, Poe!" Rey sighed, getting up from the couch she was sitting on, beginning to pace behind it.

"Look, I'm not saying it makes sense." Finn finally piped up. "I'm not a fan of the situation. But look...Rey's not hurt. And while I don't like the fact that she's been getting all buddy-buddy with Ren, what are we supposed to do about it?" he asked, turning to face Poe.

Poe looked hurt, his own feelings getting in the way of this meeting of friends that suddenly felt like it had become an intervention. The ace pilot sighed and crossed his arms as he rubbed his eyes. 

“You’re right Finn. Rey isn’t hurt, she’s still our friend, and there really isn’t anything we can do about it.” Dameron had been beaten by Kylo and his goons, but that obviously wasn’t happening to Rey so maybe she was right after all. “If he hasn’t already put you in danger then I would be surprised. That’s all I’m going to say.”

Finally, Rose made it down to the break room that the trio (plus BB-8) was in, out of breath as she ran through the doorway and into the room. Rey noticed the franticness just in Rose's expression, and felt a pit form in her stomach.

"Woah, woah, Rose, what's going on?" Finn asked, getting up to try and see if anything was wrong with the mechanic.

"Kylo Ren...sneaking by....near the transports" she said, taking a few breaths before starting over. "He tried to sneak past me...I think he's looking for a ship. He tried using the Force magic thing on me." she relayed, and Rey's eyes widened. Ben was supposed to be talking with Leia.

Without another word, Rey rushed past the ex-trooper and mechanic, towards the transport grounds where they kept the X-wings, Finn calling after her to wait up. The only thing going through Rey's mind at that moment was Ben...hoping she could get to him in time.

Poe almost instantly looked concerned to see the engineer so disheveled but clearly it wasn’t good news so the ace pilot’s mood soured further. As Rose relayed her message and Rey bolted from the room, Poe grabbed Finn by the arm and held him back, determined to keep at least one of his friends in check. 

“Hold it right there buddy! Let her go! Let Rey go, Finn.” Poe held the other man tightly to keep him from pulling away as the scavenger sprinted down the hall. 

Rey ran, adrenaline pumping through her veins as she tried to catch up to Ben, try to reason with him, or know why he was taking off so suddenly. What did she do differently that had him taking off like this? What had Leia said to him? Coming into the hangar, Rey managed to get inside, but only to see the X-wing with Ben in it take off.

"Ben!" she called out, though she knew it was useless. The Jedi's chest tightened and a lump formed in her throat, but she wouldn't allow herself to break down. Instead, she simply took a few deep and shaky breaths, wiping her eyes before she went completely numb. Rey slowly made her way back to the break room where Poe, Rose, Finn and BB-8 were.

"Did he take off?" Finn asked upon seeing his friend.

With an emotionless, expressionless face, Rey simply nodded as she went to the coffee machine, pouring herself a cup of hot coffee.

Poe had nothing to say as he slumped in his chair, a quiet reverence in the room as everyone saw how Rey felt and knew the answer to Finn’s question. The pilot wanted to leave Rey be, but also knew friends stuck together so he closed his mouth before saying something he would regret. The star lines of hyperspace flowed by like the rapids of a mountain stream, and it somehow made it worse that they had left that place in space as well.

Rey was feeling many things as the moments passed. At first, she just felt sick, and empty. Then she was distraught, just wanting to be alone to feel what she needed to feel in order to let this pass. And eventually, came the anger, and the confusion. Why did she care that Ben had left without telling her? The answer was quite simple, really, but Rey wouldn't allow herself to admit it. Rey of Jakku, the girl who had come from nothing, was indeed in love with Ben Solo. And as much as she wished she could stop, that wasn't an option.

Rey finished her cup of coffee, ignoring the looks of concern from Finn and Rose. She proceeded to get up and wash the cup, not bothering to change the freezing cold temperature of the water. When she was done, she dried her hands and leaned against the counter, closing her eyes.

"I'm sorry..." she murmured, directed at her friends. "I'm sorry I left...I'm sorry I lied. I'm sorry."

Poe was the first to foolishly approach Rey, she needed friends at times like this just as much as she needed to be alone. The pilot carefully and gently placed a hand on her shoulder and tried to meet her saddened gaze. 

“I don’t quite know what you are going through. I don’t think anyone here really ever could, except Leia..” Poe took a step back now, ready to leave the room. 

“I’m here if you need someone to talk to or.. just a drinking buddy.” Dameron turned and walked past the droid and the other two as he left, the door sealing with the same hiss as it always had. Poe would wait out in the hall for another five minutes in case he was needed.

Rose, Finn, and BB-8 followed after Poe, not knowing what else they could say or do to help their friend. They figured if she needed help, she could reach out to them if they needed. At the moment, Rey didn't want to talk to anyone though. She just wanted to be left alone for the moment as she went to lock the door. There were many other rooms like this, so surely is anyone needed, they could go somewhere else.

The girl pondered over whether or not she should try to connect with Ben, and try to get an answer to the many questions left running through her head. She just wanted answers, then she would leave him be. Closing her eyes, Rey took a deep breath, attempting to open the door to their connection.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated, as well as Kudos, as it really helps us know what you think!!


	18. Coming to an Understanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey managed to reach Ben through their connection...what truths will be revealed?

Ben was back in the hands of friendly yet suspicious First Order officers within the hour of leaving behind his friend and family on the Mon Cala starship, a place that felt like it was halfway across the galaxy now. General Hux questioned the leader of the knights of Ren for over an hour about his whereabouts and the ginger man eventually gave up to believe Ben’s stories of scavenging old historic Jedi sites. 

Standing on the bridge of a star destroyer could make anyone feel powerful, or trapped like in a cage. Ben Solo was not sure how he felt as he overlooked the operational Supremacy that stayed as a defensive flotilla as it’s hull was being put back together. The supreme leader had an appointment to meet the generals of the fifth and seventh fleets to coordinate a search pattern for the rebellion. It was all a waste of time as bickering always took up time within such meetings as squabbles over power and funding had become a regular occurrence. Ben Solo would use this next meeting as a vital step towards fulfilling his plan, the plan of tearing apart a military state from within.

It was the busiest moment possible aboard the star destroyer Finalizer as a group of pirates attacked the capital ship in a vain attempt to capture it. Three smaller cruisers had already been shredded by heavy turbo-laser fire all the while a few cobbled together gunships evaded the heavy flak altogether. Unfortunately the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren; General Hux was still in command of the fallen Jedi’s prized ship until the completion of the Supremacy’s repairs. Ben yelled over the cacophony of yelling commands and explosions from just outside to try and be heard by his subordinates.

“Launch fighter’s from the auxiliary hangers and fire a spread of lasers at zero point five and ninety point three!”

Rey had spent a few hours trying to connect to Ben, with small breaks in between that she used to close her eyes for a little and regain her energy. But time after time again, she was shut out. What could she have done to make him so upset that he wouldn't accept? She had no clue where he was going, and what he was going to do, but she was willing to bet he was back with the First Order. The question was, what was he doing at the Order?

The cold of the connection met the back of Ben’s mind amidst the chaos and he could feel Rey’s place in the force like a candle in the dark. Amid the noise and business around him the fallen Jedi did not see Rey, but felt her through the force. “I still don’t understand how or why this bridge between us works.” The deep voice was calm and quiet compared to the maelstrom around him on the bridge.

"That's not any new information." Rey replied bitterly, secretly relieved that she got through to him, "What was all that? You talk with Leia, I give you two privacy, and you sneak around and just run off? Do you have any idea how dangerous that was? Did you even try to think about what that looked like to me?" She asked exasperatedly. "This is all just a game to you, isn't it? I try to help you get your family back, I tell you things I otherwise would never tell you, and you up and leave without even a goodbye?"

An explosion rocked the ship as one of the two pesky gunships were successfully shot down at the price of crashing into the bridge deflection shield array. A very angry Hux yelled over the symphony of alarms, “Intensify the forward batteries, I don’t want anything to get through. Now where are TIE squadrons?!”

Ben was like a ghost on the bridge, nobody took notice of the Supreme Leader standing in place before turning around to look Rey in the eyes with sorrowful remorse. 

“This is not the time Rey, but I sense there are many converging paths in the force. Perhaps our paths will cross again soon... I’m sorry.” The dark robes and cloak flowed as Kylo Ren left the bridge for his own meditation chamber and allowed the shared connection to collapse. Some things must be known in order for his plan to work, so the Force would guide his design. Even Rey could not help him. 

Rey could hear explosions around Ben, not easing the tension of the situation whatsoever. Where the hell was Ben, and what was he doing? Was he in trouble? Upon hearing him brush her off, Rey was ready to run her mouth, but that was when he closed the connection.

“She would only distract from the mission.” Ben reasoned with himself out loud as his thoughts were clouded by his personal feelings to a point of self annoyance. The star destroyer rocked with another explosion as the battle finally came to a close and ships were dispatched to salvage the ship's wreckage for helpful intel.

It was like she was breaking through a door to get through to him, but somehow, the young Jedi did, rage and hurt evident in her expression. Rey wasn't really aware of her next move, which proved to be quite daring considering the circumstances. Attempting to strike him across the face, Rey missed by a few centimeters, a look of horror on her face. No...she couldn't hurt him. Sure, it was at a smaller scale, but she didn't want to risk hurting Ben like she did in her nightmares. "What is it with you and declaring that I'm a 'distraction'!?" Rey finally asked.

To say anything that had to do with Rey was the last thing he expected was an overstatement; Ben hadn’t really expected much beyond the small battle around the capital ship and the madness on the bridge. The son of Leia opened his eyes at the sound of Rey stumbling in front of him, and his immediate reaction was to fall backwards and crawl the few feet to sit up against the wall. Panicked surprise melted away into anger and confusion as Ben stood up expecting the person in front of him to be anything but an angrily shouting Rey.

"You reach out to me and tell me things you don't tell anyone else. I tell you things I don't tell my best friends, and you brush me off like that? You decide that your secrecy is more important than your safety that is important to me? I don't know what the hell I have to do to convince you that I care and that I want to help. Why won't you let me? It feels like some sort of convoluted game that I'm losing!" the girl rambled, absolutely fuming at the audacity of the man in front of her.

Gaining his footing as he stood, Ben took the step that brought him inches from the less experienced force user. His frustration had muddied the water for the time being as he had temporarily forgotten how Rey had even got there. Pointing a single finger at her he scowled and gave her a piece of his own mind. 

“My ship is under attack while I try my best to help you from half a galaxy away by winning the trust of every officer and ensign on this ship. You may not understand Rey, but what I do, I do to protect you. I left abruptly without telling you because I am afraid of this and what the future holds for me!” Before the scavenger of Jakku could reply with anything else clever or angry Ben Solo took her face in both hands and kissed the woman deeply for only a brief moment before pulling away. 

The scavenger was taken aback by the outburst from Ben. While it may have only been words, the statement of 'what I do, I do to protect you,' had her thoughts reeling. Before she even got the chance to respond, Ben placed his lips upon hers. Unsure of how to respond, Rey remained frozen in his hold. By the time he had pulled away, everything had finally begun to process.

Now only death itself could protect the thoughts and emotions of Ben Solo as everything had been put on display like a canvas covered in paint. The dark Jedi was breathing heavily as his hands remained on Rey and his own mixed emotions terrified him just the same as it was a partial relief to have everything he was laid out to be seen.

Her heart beat fast as Rey made her next move. Reaching up, she cupped Ben's cheek as she stood on her toes to better reach him. Without another word, Rey closed her eyes and pressed her lips against his, returning the sentiment. While the girl was terrified of the unknown which lay ahead, she hoped this would be enough to let Ben know that she felt the same.

The returned kiss wasn’t as unexpected as one would think but it still caught Ben by surprise and he had to take a step back as he visually scanned the woman in front of him for something obviously wrong with her. 

“You....” The fallen Jedi couldn’t find his voice for a moment as confusion and a mix of other emotions like pride and relief clashed in his heart. “You-you shouldn’t... How are you here? There’s no way you could have snuck aboard unless...” It now became clear the warmth Ben felt wasn’t coming completely from his feelings towards the kiss, the warmth partially came from a wellspring of energy in the force. It was their connection he felt. 

Solo was at a loss for words and only hoped Rey could give him an answer to the questions he hadn’t even asked, he even regretted a few things such as failing to inform his mother of the peculiar connection that bridged their minds. “Does she know about us? About what we share in the force?” Ben felt hopeful that Leia didn’t know as the small chamber fell silent.

Rey simply shrugged in response to Ben's question.

"I mean....I'm not too sure. I told her about how the Force bond was...with how I can feel what you feel sometimes. But I don't think she knows anything beyond that." she said, her hand lowering from Ben's face down to his own hand, lacing her fingers with his. "Ben...I can't say I know what the hell I'm doing with this...and I can't say that I'm not terrified. I don't want you getting hurt."

To know Rey had said anything at all was enough for now, but his hope was to get out of the current mess and back to his mother eventually, and tell the full story. “Leia needs to know all about it, completely. If she doesn’t understand then perhaps Luke will..” It felt strange to speak his old master’s name like that, it left a bad taste in his mouth for a moment because their last meeting had ended with the Jedi master having completely lost faith in Ben. “I’m strong, I won’t be hurt. You’re the one bumping into trouble like it’s a hobby.”

Her eyes were always a dead giveaway. From the start of this entire bond between them, Rey's eyes were the door to all of her feelings and emotions. What was held in them at that moment was fear, relief, and worry. 

"What do you feel, Ben? What do you feel towards me, because I don't know if I can keep dancing around the subject..."

Rey might as well have put a blaster to him with the look she gave, and now she had shown the proverbial blaster was loaded with her words. “I feel.. Fear, but hope. I-I.. Have always felt the pull to you but I didn’t understand it for so long.” Solo had nearly forgotten the fact that he had a bridge crew probably looking for him with a whole heap of poor news and fear of his reaction. “I’ve loved you Rey.. For how long I’m unsure but I love you.” The fallen Jedi grabbed the scavenger and simply held her close in a tight hug. She was an anchor in the force, and he always felt like the boat in a larger ocean.

Rey froze as Ben pulled her in for a hug, the confession of love tumbling from his lips. It was like they had switched places, her not knowing how to react to the physical contact. She cared for Ben immensely, but never did she think she would hear him say he loved her. All of it went back to the small, abandoned girl back on Jakku who was alone, who was nothing. But clearly, she was something to Ben. Tears glistened in her eyes before she closed them, finally succumbing to the affection he was finally showing.

Sure, Rey knew her friends at some level loved her, but she hadn't heard someone tell her in fourteen years. To hear the words 'I love you' after so long struck a chord within the scavenger. She melted into the hug, clinging onto Ben like a lifeline.

Seeing Rey in such a vulnerable and emotional state was not something Ben had prepared for, but still it meant a lot to be able to hold her like an anchor for her, for once. 

“You don’t need to say anything..”

"I never...I didn't expect..." Rey tried to explain, the confession having rendered her temporarily speechless. "Ben, I-"

The nearest door buzzer went off loudly and the panel opened, interrupting Rey, the startling sound making the connection collapse. As soon as she disappeared, General Hux walked in, his face stone cold.

The scarlet lightsaber arced forth from the dark hilt and was held so it’s angry blade came an inch from the pale man’s face. 

“What business do you have interrupting my meditation?” Kylo Ren roared, the lack of any mask these days made him all that more intimidating even without a red glow to harshly aluminate the scar that ran down the Supreme Leader’s face. General Hux stammered for a moment before taking a step back out of the room to deliver the news. 

“The rest of the bridge crew.. Well it sounds like a..” Hux had to cover his own hide regardless of the puny losses around him. It assured the man power to betray and deceive. “I believe they are planning to stage a mutiny against us.”

It was hidden within but Ben Solo knew Armitage wove lies with his silver tongue. “Go to your quarters while I deal with the lot of them...” Ben Solo had only two options that were both horrible, his red blade retreated within the hilt as he left the small meditation room and headed for the bridge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So....that happened. Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! Tell us what you think, and what you think is going to happen next!


	19. Drinking Buddies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is grappling with her most recent discovery, and figures she should take up Poe's offer on that drink.

Rey stood in the middle of the break room, finally alone again. She didn't want to be alone, she wanted to be wherever Ben was, she wanted to help him. Finally tell him that she felt the same, and try to get him out of the mess of the First Order. But she knew this was now his turn to redeem himself in the eyes of the Resistance, and she didn't want to take that away from him by distracting him with her own safety. Taking a deep breath, Rey got herself composed again.

Finally coming out of the break room, Rey went to hunt down Poe and take him up on that drink. She ended up finding him in the small bar that they had on the ship, and took a seat right next to him. 

"Think I could take you up on that offer from earlier?" she asked.

Poe was already two glasses deep when Rey entered the bar looking like she had been slapped in an argument. “Sure. I just got started so I can still care to taste the good stuff.” 

The pilot tossed a couple calamari credit chips onto the bar and mumbled out an order for something to do with the slumber of a rancor; A short glass of honey colored liquid was passed by Dameron in front of Rey. Poe’s brown eyes moved from the glass to the scavenger’s face and he swore he saw something akin to heartbreak. 

“Did you hit him hard? The guy who broke your heart?” The Ace pilot was not that intuitive all the time but this time in particular it was what he gathered from Rey’s expression and lightly shaking hands..

As soon as the drink was set in front of her, Rey immediately tossed back the strong tasting alcohol that made her throat burn. 

"I tried. Missed." Rey said shortly in response to Poe's question.

Since being a part of the Resistance, Rey had been able to do odd jobs to acquire quite a few credits of her own. It was a force of habit to save them all and spend as little as she needed, but that habit was out the window at the moment. Sliding over another few credits to the bartender, she was immediately given the same drink as before.

Rey’s attitude definitely seemed off from the moment she actually took up the offer to drink together. Poe’s own curiosity grew as to just what Rey meant in her answer to his casual and no nonsense question but even that was overshadowed by immediate concern. The pilot’s eyes went wide as Rey downed the shot and paid for more in the blink of an eye. No words formed as Poe wanted to say some kind of warning but he was stunned enough he nearly forgot his own shot. 

“Uhh.. You feeling okay Rey?” The man downed the amber liquid in one gulp as it burned its way to warming him from the stomach outward.

"Not really." Rey said honestly, a bitter chuckle escaping her lips as she downed the second drink, grimacing a bit as the shot went down. Her shoulders were visibly tense, her jaw locked with her eyes looking straight ahead as her mind processed exactly what happened moments earlier in the break room. Glancing over at Poe, she noticed his slightly shocked expression.

"Sorry...I've just got a lot on my mind at the moment." she sighed, leaning back a bit in her seat as she ran her finger along the rim of the shot glass absentmindedly. Poe was like a brother to her, as was Finn. But she wasn't exactly sure if she should really tell him what was going on. If he had flipped when she told him about her adventures across the galaxy, how could she expect him to react about her kissing the enemy, and loving him in return?

In his mind it seemed like a good idea to maybe put a reassuring hand on the scavenger’s shoulder; but seeing how tense she was also looked like a good way to get smacked, so he kept his hands to himself and the empty glass in front of him. 

“Do you uhh, want to talk about what’s bothering you?” The empty glass was joined by a new shot that Poe knocked back and flipped over to set beside the first one. Seeing just what was happening the droid behind the bar brought a small tray and gathered the glasses on it, but left the tray as the two patrons were certainly not yet done. two new small glasses appeared before the resistance heroes like it was magic.

"Not particularly, considering the subject has proven to aggravate everyone." Rey replied with a sad smile, looking down at her new and filled shot glass, debating whether or not to have another. She had to stay relatively sober, knowing that Ben was going to do something about the First Order. She needed to be able to help him if need be. With a sigh, she knocked back the next shot.

Poe glanced over at Rey as she mentioned how whatever had her down aggravated everyone, yet he couldn’t think of what that reason could possibly be. The ace Resistance pilot had truthfully come down to the bar to knock a few back for his fallen squad mates as was traditional for their death date. Now Poe was here for Rey and she looked to be in a bad place. 

"You know, when you have feelings for someone, and your chest feels like there's a huge weight on it?" Rey asked as soon as she had finished her shot.

“Yeah.. I know that. The stress and thrill of combat is a different beast entirely but.. I know that too.” Poe made the decision to cut off the flow of alcohol to the two of them. “Thanks AD-4, but we’re done. Just put it all on me.” He turned straight back to her with no regret of his choice, even his expression was softer towards her.

Rey sighed as Poe cut her off, rolling her eyes a bit as she crossed her arms and frowned. If she were to do so when she was young, it would be considered pouting, but it definitely wasn't in the scenario, not one bit. 

"Have you ever had someone catch you completely off guard with stuff like that? Like, all of a sudden somebody is all like 'hey, I actually don't hate you and here's this big confession'!" she rambled before stopping herself, closing her eyes with a big sigh.

"Sorry...I'm just...thinking way too much all at once and I have no idea how to talk about it." She said, this time quieter and more calm.

Poe already was curious about what was bothering Rey but now he was confused and even taken aback a bit.

“Uh. Y-yeah, something like that..” The pilot paused as Rey explained herself but it didn’t help how he felt about the situation all that much. “Are you going to be okay? Do you need anything?” Poe was concerned for her friend’s well being as this behavior had seemingly come from nowhere. 

With a defeated sigh, Rey nodded and took the last shot, knocking it back and getting out of her seat. "Thanks, Poe." she said, offering a small smile of assurance that she would be alright.

With only the best intentions he slid her the last untouched shot that he’d yet to consume. “Drink this and get some rest, I’m sure it’ll help you get past this.” With a reassuring pat on the shoulder Dameron left the scavenger alone at the bar so he could get back to his duties as a commander.

Setting a few credits on the table as a tip, Rey made her way to her small sleeping space in the ship, closing the door behind her. She changed into her night clothes and crawled under the blankets, hugging her knees to her chest. Soon enough, Rey managed to drift off to dreamless sleep, the alcohol doing a number on relaxing her.


	20. Reciprocation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Rey come into contact again...how will their conversation go?

As the dark cloaked Kylo Ren arrived on the bridge to find it in almost the same state he left it in, except for the fact that the skirmish had been won and post-battle-reports were flying in from all over the large destroyer. Keeping true to his word, Kylo ignited his saber and instantly every eye was on him. 

“Any challenger against my rule will be dealt with a severe punishment to you and those in your station.” The angry red blade shrunk away and the warm glow no longer illuminated his face. “Back to your duties immediately.” The dark Jedi had to bark at his command staff. Ben hated acting this way, but it was the only way to keep up the facade. 

The cool air aboard the star destroyer Finalizer felt too dry and constricting after Ben Solo’s visit to a Mon Cala cruiser. In his dark robes he stood on the bridge and quietly looked out at the departing shuttle that held the annoying General Hux as it flew towards a gargantuan star destroyer that would normally belong to the supreme leader. In his mind which in some ways was the only privacy he had left, Ben considered the repercussions of firing on the mostly defenseless shuttle; It was not worth it in the slightest. 

After two days in orbit of a planetary shipyard the Finalizer departed with a very carefully hand picked crew from officer to stormtrooper. A hologram of a few different officers floated above a table as almost everyone argued about promotions or assignments. Ben hated this much conflict now, it hurt to be the cause of it somehow, even if it would lead to an eventual self destructive power vacuum. Out of seven total members the only two people not bickering were Hux and Ben himself, constantly exchanging glances until the meeting dissolved and the holo projection faded out. 

Ben retreated to his quarters and glanced at the small meditation chamber where he had impossibly kissed Rey. A semi comfortable bed was there to meet Solo as he tried to sleep, but no sleep came. That scavenger from Jakku nagged his mind unintentionally as his connection to her was a strong one. He feared for her as though simply thinking the idea that the Resistance would hurt her for knowing him made it true. A single tear for Rey trailed down the fallen Jedi’s face as he drifted off and another dream found him.

_ This time Ben did not find his Empress on the bridge, but in his bed lying quietly facing away from him. “Who are you..?” The dark Jedi heard himself ask as the woman sat up and swung her legs off the bed. Rey sat there wearing only the same revealing attire as before with her back to him, stretching before standing up to show a lattice of scars across her back in the low light before lazily reaching for a belt that held a lightsaber; the belt sat lopsided on her hips.  _

_ Rey did not turn around nor did she answer his question, but simply motion for him to follow.  _

_ The two walked to a window and stood side by side. _

_ “If you love me.. why would you continue to abandon me?” The dark haired woman said in a hollow voice of sorrow and despair. Ben already knew the answer as he spoke, watching a jungle planet he did not recognize spin below. “Because I can do more good here. Like a wolf in sheep’s clothing.” Dark Rey wailed and forced Ben through the far viewport and into the vacuum. As the false supreme leader faded into nothingness the last words of dark Rey filled his head.  _

_ “No, no. Like a sheep in wolf’s clothing.” The last Ben knew was how much he hoped Rey, the real Rey, was safe and happy. _

Only three hours had elapsed since he drifted off and the cold sweat on Solo’s brow told him it had been a dream, even if it was just a very real one. After a quick trip to the refresher to splash some water on his face there was only one thing left to do. Sitting on the floor of the meditation room was cold as always, but the failed Jedi focused his effort into one thing and sent that across the void to Rey. _ ”Yavin” _

The scavenger needed to know how he felt, but more importantly the danger she was in.

Rey was training in the training room when she heard the message from Ben, nearly sending her saber into the wall of the room. Quickly deactivating the saber, she ran out of the room and went to go find Leia and tell her of her plan.

She was anxious to see Ben again, to finally be able to tell him how she felt, to be able to return the sentiment from their last connection. With the reluctant go-ahead from General Organa, Rey got herself an X-wing fighter and took off in the direction of Yavin-4.

To hear about Rey’s sudden and unexplained departure left Poe, Finn, and Rose, feeling a sense of hope for their friend’s well being since Poe had divulged to the rest of her friends just how bad things were looking for the Jedi. Another subject of conversation would be brought up by Finn and that was just where Rey could be going, but every single idea shared would be met with doubt; yet Poe’s own thoughts went to what Rey had said to him the night before at the bar, instead of blurting out ideas he was quietly thinking. Leia would surely keep the secret of Rey’s location, but it made the Resistance General think about the situation at large and just how much had been going on in secret, and especially how it worried her as the universe changed rapidly without excuse or reason. 

The continued borrowing of ships would certainly catch someone’s eyes, so this time around Ben Solo flew an old Lambda class Imperial shuttle to the ancient jungle world of Yavin-4. As familiar star lines reformed to the speckled darkness of space and the Yavin system sat before him in all its majesty, Ben was honestly surprised to not see any Resistance ships hanging in the upper atmosphere of his destination. As the tri-winged ship soared above the massassi temples the scanners eventually found the X-wing Ben had been searching for and he activated the landing sequence with anxiety rising in his chest.

Landing on Yavin-4, Rey powered down the ship and spent the next few moments sitting in her seat, thinking about what she was going to say to Ben. Was she going to pick up from their earlier conversation and blurt out that she felt the same as he did for her? Probably wouldn't be the proper way to start a conversation, but Rey was overthinking (again). The young Jedi decided that the best approach would just be to see what happens and react.

The sound of an engine interrupted Rey's thinking, and she looked up to see an Imperial Shuttle landing near her ship. Undoing her safety belt and getting out of her own ship, Rey ventured outside to meet Ben. Anxiety grew in the pit of her stomach as she waited for him to disembark. Sure, she was still upset with him for leaving without telling her in the first place, but she also was happy to see him alive and safe.

The flat gray of the shuttle stood out like a sore thumb against the surroundings even more than the X-wing that sat just thirty meters away, but from the cockpit, it became clear there was a person behind the controls of the snub fighter.  _ ’She must have just arrived before me’  _ Ben thought with nervous excitement as he depressurized the cabin and prepared to disembark. Apart from the worn paint of the landing pad outside of the massive stone structure, the occasional actively blinking light of an antenna from the base was the only sign it had been inhabited anytime in the past two hundred years, even though the location had last been a Rebel base nearly twenty five years prior. 

Steam and compressed air blew out the exhausts as the ramp lowered from under the cockpit of the shuttle. The ramp hit the ground without anyone on it. Ben sat in his seat composing himself as another in person meeting with Rey was a bit much to handle this soon after their last encounter and the dream he had. After taking a few deep breaths and finding his own steely determination once again, Ben walked down the ramp out into the warm and humid jungle air. When he spotted the Jakku native standing on the ground just beside the nose of the fighter. With his bad nerves hidden under his steely facade Ben approached Rey at a quick walk to keep the wait to a minimum without also looking worried or rushed. Five feet between them and the lost Jedi was determined to use caution even though the two of them were alone without any other presence than the native animals and the gas giant and sun above in the sky.

“It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?” It was an informal greeting but he couldn’t bring himself to say something warmer.

Rey was at a loss for words, spending the next few moments trying to think of something to say, anything to say. She was pissed off, she was relieved, and she was happy he was here. But he left, and Rey didn't know if she was supposed to yell at him for his little stunt, or throw her arms around him and hug him. So, the scavenger settled for both.

"What the hell was all of that!?" She exclaimed incredulously. "It's been a while!? Is that all you have to say? I try to connect with you, and when you  _ finally _ let me in, you tell me  _ you love me _ !?" Everything that she had bottled up in the Resistance base was finally being let out, and she didn't seem like she was stopping any time soon, her eyes glistening with unshed tears that were already threatening to spill. "You  _ kissed _ me, Ben! And all you have to say is 'It's been a while'!?" Without another word, Rey ran forward and practically tackled Ben in a tight hug, the tears finally rolling down her cheeks.

Ben stood there expecting anything to happen, even if the shuttle he flew in on just suddenly exploded it would have been expected to the point he would have wanted to see how big the fireball was, but he did not see what was actually coming. The explosion had not come from behind, but from in front of him, from the poor scavenger’s frayed emotions. 

“I.. I don’t.. I.” Maintaining his composure was becoming increasingly difficult with the second. “I don’t think that’s how it works, I don’t understand the force.. but I know it’s true” He said weakly because Ben knew she was right. The broken man did have strong feelings for the scavenger, and she was right to be upset, to even hurt him like he had hurt her. 

If Ben wasn’t such a well built and tall man there’s a good chance Rey’s assaulting hug would have knocked him over, but instead he held her tight, hoping that he could know how to make things right. With his arms wrapped around her one hand gently stroked down her back in the same way Ben remembered his own mother doing once to comfort him as a child. 

“I don’t understand how or why our minds are bridged.. I don’t.” Everything the broken Jedi had done to prepare for this moment paled in comparison to what was needed, and it hurt that he wasn’t strong enough for her now. “Tell me how I can fix this..” Ben spoke in a soft whisper to the young woman he held so gently. “I want to help.” No tears came to his eyes but Ben felt broken either way.

Rey wanted to yell at him, tell him that he was selfish, that he had no right to play with her emotions like this. And he didn't, but she also knew how difficult this was for him. Slowly, but surely, he was breaking away from the First Order. Soon enough, he might even be able to come home. "I don't know..." the scavenger replied, reaching up and wiping away her tears before breaking from the hug so she could get a good look at him. His dark locks, his piercing gaze...his face full of worry. 

"You scared me, you know that?" Rey remarked, cracking a small smile as she reached up and brushed some of his hair back. Standing on her toes, Rey pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek before hugging him again.    
"Ben...I love you too." she said quietly, her heart pounding in her chest. Those words were the hardest words to say, but she knew she needed to say them. To finally validate what she had been feeling, rather than letting it become a source of fear.

It was somehow reassuring in some twisted way that Rey didn’t know how to help their predicament either, or if it was even just that, a predicament. As she broke the hug and Ben saw the scavenger smile it gave him a boost he so desperately needed. Now in a moment of excited confusion Ben Solo smiled for what felt like the first time in weeks. 

“I know..” He couldn’t say anything else, the dark Jedi was trapped in a moment of mixed emotions that almost made him dizzy. Unable to speak because of the situation, Ben held her face as he leaned in and kissed Rey deeply with just as much if not more passion than their first kiss. He broke away after a few time-freezing moments as concern flooded his veins like ice water just as a couple nights before. 

“I love you so much, and that’s why I’m here. You’re in danger Rey.” Before she could ask or even protest further Ben had one thing more to say. “It’s time I came home, and I need your help.”


	21. Shelter from the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben find shelter away from the rain, finally able to have a peaceful conversation.

The moment Ben pressed his lips against hers, Rey closed her eyes, kissing back as she wrapped her arms around him once more, standing on her toes to better reach him. When he finally pulled away, Rey listened closely. And she couldn't be more happy to hear that he was ready to come home. 

"Anything, I promise." she assured him. Light raindrops fell down from the sky one by one, all coming down faster as the moments passed. Rey couldn't help but look up at the sky, a look of pure joy etched onto her face. She loved the rain. Whenever it would rain on Ajan Kloss, Rey was often the only one wanting to be outside, marveling at the water that fell from the sky.

Like electricity ran through his veins, Ben was now more excited to hear how much Rey was willing to help him, because he would need everything she could provide and more. The rain rapidly picked up from a light sprinkle to a heavy downpour in seconds as the wall of water passed over them. “We should get out of this storm!” He shouted over the cacophony of the rain and wind that only seemed to strengthen by the second. It was like second nature to put Rey ahead of him, even if he had spent the entirety of his adult life without kindness or even much respect. Ben placed a hand on her upper back and ran just beside and behind her to the ancient stone temple that stood out in the clearing. 

Once under the cover of stone and out of the rain, Ben noticed he was already soaked to the bone and so was Rey in her tunic. “I’ll get a fire going..” He stepped close with his face only inches from hers, but he simply fixed her hair that now hung down in her face. A twitch of a smile was hinted on the corner of his mouth before Ben walked off towards the store rooms just down the hall. Rey closed her eyes as he stepped closer, but when she realized he was just fixing her hair, she opened then again, smiling back at him. She followed after, wrapping her arms around herself as the cold started to set in. 

"Do you need any help?" she asked once they made it to the storage room. It was dark, except for the smallest bit of light coming through the open doorway. Ben tried to be careful in the old storage room but he still managed to kick some kind of old lantern over in the process of fumbling around in the dark. 

“No! I got this!” He managed to shout from the back of the room. After five minutes of stumbling around in the dark and throwing things aside since it was already a disorganized mess, Ben walked back out visibly shivering, but also holding a number of flammable objects, including some items made for the very purpose of a fire in a survival situation. With his arms full of stuff, he kindly asked Rey what she thought about the situation. “So where should we build a fire? We know half this base is completely non-functional, and the other half is spotty with electricity as it is so this will be our only heat for the next few hours. There’s the old briefing room, pilots lounge, or... that closet.” His look was unapologetic but still in his eyes was a soft, caring look.

"Closet, maybe?" Rey said as her eyes flickered around the space, trying to devise the best logical plan for the both of them. "It's a small space to warm, but at the same time, that poses risk for the fire spreading too much...the old briefing room is probably our best best. Not too spacious, but enough that we have enough room. There are probably some things in there too we can use for fuel." she deducted, reaching out and taking some of the items from Ben so he wouldn't have to carry everything himself. "Come on, let's get warmed up. The last thing we need right now is for either of us to get sick."

“That’s true, so it’s decided. The old briefing room.” Ben was not expecting Rey to carry some of the load, but found it endearing nonetheless. “I agree, we’re not exactly anywhere near civilization.” While the whole situation was unfortunate, Ben wanted to move on, but this place had the upper hand and held him here. Ben began clearing one corner of the old and dusty room and as he found a good spot he dropped the flammable items on the ground. “Do you know why you’re here, Rey?” It was a sort of random question, but Ben knew what he was doing, he felt mostly confident as he even worked to build a half decent fire from the scrap. Thunder and howling winds roared outside as even the mighty stone of the ancient temple let some sound in. Rey had learned how to make a fire thanks to Poe, who had taught her how to do so after a particular mission that made it essential for them to keep warm. She was helping gather everything relatively close together. When Ben asked her why she was there, the question confused her for a moment. Why was she there? Because she wanted to see Ben safe? Because she missed him? Because yelling at him for leaving was slightly therapeutic? The answer to all of those questions was of course yes, but was there more? 

"Because I wanted to see if you would act differently if I was really here." she answered. "Because I wanted to see you safe, I wanted to yell at you. Because... I wanted to help you." Ben paused after piecing together a quarter of the fire to watch how Rey improved what was essentially an organized mess. He turned and met Rey’s brown eyes, her words dancing around the core meaning of everything she said. 

“You came here because you needed me more than I needed you. Am I wrong?” After a moment Ben turned back to the fire and built it up a bit more while being careful not to knock it over. With a small spark from a broken piece of technology that somewhat resembled a data pad, Ben lit the kindling aflame and the room was lit up considerably from just the small fire.

Rey scoffed, rolling her eyes at his assumption, "Yes, because frankly, you're the one that suggested I come here. I simply just humored you." she grumbled as she sat in front of the fire, pulling her knees to her chest. "You know, it's not that bad to admit that you in some capacity are glad I even showed up. I could've just as well sent you off without any intention of showing up. Perfect karma, considering that you up and left back on the Resistance ship without so much as a goodbye." Ben realized his mistake a moment too late, he had upset Rey and now he had to bear that. He sat with his legs crossed just beside Rey and watched the fire consume it’s given fuel as he listened to what she said, and she was right. He met her intense gaze with a hardened one of his own, he had seen and done many things in his life, not all being so nice as getting to hold Rey in his arms. 

“You’re right. You could have just let me come here alone, and I would have deserved it, but saying goodbye was always hard so.. I just try to avoid those entirely.” His gaze fell to the stone floor again, the heat of the small fire keeping him warm where his sour memories often left him cold. After the room fell silent with his words in the air, Ben uttered a single word. “Thanks.” Rey was immensely important to his mission in destroying what he had once called a government; the First Order was a fanatical military hell bent on the collection of power, especially now that the leader of it was dead. “Thanks for coming, I needed you.” He said as he cautiously took Rey’s hand.

"You're welcome." Rey replied quietly, gently squeezing the man's hand. She knew that he didn't mean any harm by his comments, and that he was doing his best to make the transition from the dark back into the light. She slowly moved closer to Ben, hesitating a bit before leaning over and resting her head on his shoulder. "Your efforts to help me have not gone unnoticed." Ben sat still, watching every wild tendril of flame whip the air as the material that fueled it was burned away. It was when Rey spoke up and made the mention he didn’t expect, that he looked into her pretty brown eyes. 

“Help you..? How’ve I helped you?” He was confused but ready to listen even through the roar of the storm outside and the never ending rumble of water pouring down the stepped temple. It felt a little selfish but the young Solo couldn’t think of any substantial moment in helping Rey.

"I've become a better Force-user because of you." Rey said simply as she looked back up at him. "I've become a better person. I'm less...cold. I'm not as afraid." she explained, her thumb running back and forth along his knuckles. The light from the fire cast a warm glow over the two huddled together, reminiscent of the first time they touched hands back when Rey was first training. It was almost instinctual to say it, but regardless, he spoke it right as Rey stopped with barely a breath in between. 

“I felt cold in you before.. like the storm outside only, it was within you, and it was that night when we touched hands.” Ben was visibly relaxed but his breath hitched as she brushed his knuckles, his hands were actually somewhat warm but the scavenger’s was cold.

"I remember that night." Rey murmured. "I was so upset. Distraught. I felt like there was no light at the end of the tunnel for a moment or two. But then we touched hands, and I saw your future. It became a light at the end of the tunnel for me." she explained, a small smile on her face as she squeezed his hand again.

“I remember it too, clearly as I see you now. I was afraid for many things as I am now.” Ben’s expression remained unwavering in uncertainty as he looked deeply in her eyes. “The darkness I found within myself was a path of self destruction.. I still fear that path is unavoidable.”

Rey let go of his hand, reaching up and brushing some of Ben's hair out of his face. "We all have dark and light within us. It's our decision to choose who we side with, or if we take a side at all." she said softly, her eyes flickering over his features. "You can always change the path you're on. And I can help with that." Ben touched Rey’s hand as it brushed his face, it warmed his soul a little just as the fire warmed his body.  
  
“I don’t think we have the option of not choosing a side, Rey, but even small things can cast great shadows.” The man looked worried, almost haunted as he looked continuously into her eyes and took in her presence in the force for the small comfort it was. “You’re right, you can also be my undoing just as easily.”

Rey cracked a small smile at Ben's words, "You know, you say that, and I don't think you mind it so much any more." She teased, chuckling a bit to herself. "I don't mind being Kylo Ren's undoing, if that means that Ben Solo can finally come home."

Ben took Rey’s hand and moved it from his face, to his lips where he planted the lightest of kisses on her knuckles. “You always did have a way with words.” Ben noticed something from the corner of his eye but remained focused on the Jakku native.

The Scavenger blushed when Ben kissed her hand. It was a simple enough gesture, but it was gentle, sincere. She wasn't used to being treasured and being treated as tenderly as this. The mere action had her heart racing. "I guess I spent enough time alone with my own thoughts to be that way." she finally uttered. 

While Ben may have noticed something, Rey's guard was finally down. She couldn't focus on anything besides him. It was like a real change in the air that he could feel as Rey reacted to the otherwise innocent kiss. Ben waited in the fear he had overstepped his bounds, but the worry quickly melted away. “You could just be gifted that way.” The pile of old sleeping bags and cots the young Solo had noticed in the corner, were easily fading from short-term memory with Rey filling every thought. “We don’t have to share Yavin with anyone, do we?” Ben spoke quietly but with a heavy tone of sincerity that most anyone would have to ask if he was serious, simply because of the odd nature of the question.

Rey could picture it now. Just her and Ben, left to live on Yavin for the rest of their lives. But she would miss her friends, the Rebellion. She'd promised the General she'd get her son back, to trust her. And Rey couldn't betray that trust. "While we may not have to share it, we can't stay here forever." she sighed. Rey’s words held truth at the same time there was more buried just beneath the surface, but Ben understood completely. 

“Depends on how you look at it.” Rey shrugged as her eyes flickered back to the fire in front of them. “I imagine it would get rather lonely...we'd get awfully bored.” she pointed out as she reached up, covering her mouth as she yawned. “Then again, maybe that's something more your style.”

“I don’t think so. There’s so much to this place, so much for you to scavenge and me to discover and.. Oh, that’s not the point.” Ben smiled awkwardly and stood up, patting Rey on the shoulder as he moved to retrieve a couple non-broken cots to place near the fire. “I got this, no need to get up.” he said in a soft reassurance. Ben then walked over and grabbed two sleeping bags, one was new and untouched. Rey stayed where she was in front of the fireplace, looking in Ben's direction as he moved to get the blankets. She would have gotten up to help if it weren't for Ben's protests, but alas, he had decided he could do this on his own. 

"I can take the older one, if you'd like." Rey offered. She'd slept on the sandy grounds of Jakku, an old sleeping bag couldn't be that bad.

“I’ll take the old one, don’t worry about it.” Ben insisted as he tore open the packaging that held what would be Rey’s sleeping bag, and laid out both a safe distance from the fire. He sat on his own bed with a grin and peace of mind that rarely found him. After sitting in place for a few moments, Ben cleared his throat softly and spoke at a low level that came with the atmosphere of night. “You know you’re too kind to me, right?” His intensely dark eyes watched her hands for a passing second then he looked into her own eyes for some comfort or confirmation of his statement. Rey walked over, situating herself on the sleeping bag by him.  
  
"The galaxy hasn't been too kind to either of us." she reminded him as she climbed into her sleeping bag, curling up inside it, but her eyes remained focused on him. "You're never really required to be kind to anyone, I guess...it's just easier to do so. Especially when the person you're kind to means a great deal to you." Rey looked comfortable buried in her sleeping bag, so Ben pulled off his boots one at a time before climbing into his own makeshift bed. 

“You’re almost sounding like Leia, and I think that might be a good thing.” Even from his position of laying on his back with Rey on her side,Ben hesitated a little at first as he reached out his hand to Rey in a moment that felt as though time was slowing again.

"Why, are you going to be getting into trouble?" Rey chuckled as she watched him reach out for her. She just looked at his hand for a moment before being even more forward, rolling in her sleeping bag closer over to Ben, taking his hand in hers. "I just figured...since it can get cold later in the night..."

Ben watched with an unknowingly held breath as Rey reached out and took his hand. The young Solo looked up to meet her eyes as he blushed, in his mind he was glad the room was so dark. “You figured what?” He asked with poorly faked innocence as the orange light from the fire danced across his face.

"...I just assumed it would be a good idea to sleep closer together." She uttered quietly, not quite meeting his eyes as she ran her thumb along the back of his hand.  
  
“I understand.” Ben smiled and closed his eyes too, but for a different reason. Ben’s cot lifted just enough off the ground that it wouldn’t scrape against the ancient stone, and it moved a bit closer to Rey before hitting the ground. Instead of reaching out to hold each other’s hands, their knuckles nearly touched the floor.

"Goodnight, Ben." Rey murmured, closing her eyes, but not letting go of his hand as she stayed close beside him. The storm didn’t care for what went on inside the temple as it continued to throw high winds and lightning across the region.

“Goodnight, Rey.”


	22. An Accident Doesn't Happen Twice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Ben become more comfortable around each other whilst on Yavin-4.

There were no dreams to torture Ben about his past or possible future that night as he had a solid night of rest. Even with the lack of excitement in his mind over the long night, Ben awoke with a start, sunshine dimly lit the hallway outside the old room that served as their overnight shelter. The young Solo got up and swung his legs so his bare feet touched the cool stone floor, the embers of the fire still smoked a little after a few hours past burning out.

Rey was already outside by the time Ben had woken up. She was up with the sun, as per usual, soaking up the rays (no pun intended). While at its surface, there seemed to be no wildlife, the planet was teeming with it. When Ben finally woke up, Rey was outside, grinning to herself as she happily entertained a small reptile that resembled a gecko.

“Good morning, Rey.” Ben’s deep voice gathered the reptile's attention before it looked back at Rey. The surrounding area was littered with tree branches and green leaves from the violent storm, yet the sky was a nice blue and held a few wispy clouds like a call of innocence.

The young woman's face practically lit up upon hearing Ben's voice. She turned to look at him, her hair cascading down to reach her shoulders. She hadn't bothered with putting it up that morning, finding that she couldn't wait to go outside. 

"Ben! Morning." she replied with a small smile, gathering the small reptile in her hands, "Look what I found! I've never seen a creature like this before." Ben stood still somewhat asleep as the sun made him squint. Rey’s positive reaction was met with a large smile that reminded him of her recent actions and the actions of his mother to allow such adventure. 

“Good morning..” He grunted out not unlike his late father. The creature was cute and the look in it’s marble-like eyes could be matched to Rey’s. “I don’t imagine there are too many native little guys like this on Jakku.” He teased as his naked feet brought him to stand before the beautiful young Jedi and her new friend. “It’s kinda cute, just don’t get too attached okay?” He chuckled. If there was one thing Rey had perfected, it was distancing herself enough to not get attached. Well, except for when she was around Ben. For whatever reason, she couldn't seem to walk away, longing to be close to the man. He made her happy. And after all, didn't she deserve to be happy?

"I won't, I promise." she assured Ben as she moved the reptile to sit on her shoulder. She reached forward, fixing Ben's hair and brushing it out of his face. "Did you sleep alright?" she inquired. "The storm picked up a bit in the middle of the night, I didn't know if it woke you or not." Ben smiled at her gentle rebuke, of course she would get attached, even if it was minimal it was just who Rey was. The act of fixing his hair was no small gesture, it warmed him a lot like the morning sun on his back. 

“Yes, I slept fine for once.” Ben would look better in the face to Rey, just one full night’s rest did so much for his physical appearance and health. “I remember the storm last night, but it didn’t wake me. I take it you were woken in the middle of the night?” His voice still had the gravely undertone of sleep as he made a bold move to place his hand on the opposite shoulder of Rey’s little lizard friend.

"I'm a light sleeper." Rey replied simply. When he placed his hand on her shoulder, her smile grew a bit. She let her hand drop from his hair, placing it on his shoulder as he had done with her. Her hazel eyes searched his face for a reaction, good or bad as she unconsciously noted everything in her head. What he was adverse to, what he liked, everything in between. "I'm glad you were able to sleep, though. You seemed exhausted." Ben noticed a sparkle in Rey’s eyes that told him she would be alright regardless of how much or little sleep had been gained. Instead of tensing up when Rey’s powerful but gentle grip rested on Ben’s shoulder, he relaxed at her touch because it grounded him in reality and the present. 

“I was, and I needed that sleep, let’s hope I sleep like that more often.” A smile flashed across his face for a fleeting moment as guilt pulled him back down like a siren against a sailor. “So what is the plan? Get this old place up and running for your friends?” He sounded optimistic, happy about helping Rey and the Rebellion even. The optimism in Ben's voice only strengthened the hope that Rey had for him. 

"Sounds like a good plan to me." she replied as she stepped back, picking the gecko up from her shoulder and placing him on the ground to wander freely. "I'm not sure where we would start. All of the equipment is back on Ajan Kloss...perhaps we could start building shelters?" she suggested. Ben really couldn’t help but smile, her voice was like honey and a cool wind on a summer day. 

“I don’t think we have any need for shelters, just look at these..” Ben waved behind him at the height and size of the large and ancient temple. Chucks of stone were missing but overgrown with vines from where the Empire had once attacked as the original Rebellion fled. “So, scavenger. Are you ready to make a mess with what’s left here?” 

Rey rolled her eyes, but chuckled at the use of his old nickname for her, "Aren't I always? After all, it's what a scavenger does." she replied cheekily, gently shoving the other before running off to start repairing the temple, looking behind her for a moment to see if Ben would follow. Ben loved the camaraderie they shared, the playful banter was refreshing after so many years of tasteless and dry connections to other people. When Rey looked behind herself, Ben was indeed already quick after her. He was the son of Han Solo after all, and he was skilled with tools and electronics like the equipment one might find on a decades old Rebel base. 

“Let’s get everything online in the order it’s needed. Power first, then the planetary shields.” Ben sounded happy to be at it again, getting into something with Rey at his side was more than enough reason to do it. Rey sat on the ground near the piles of equipment, and began sorting everything. She recognized some of the parts and machinery from what they used at the Resistance, all she had to do was sort them and put them together correctly. 

"So, the parts for the sonar scanners go here." she said, pointing to a growing pile of scraps. "And the parts for what I think is a communications board go here." she said, pointing to the other pile, her brow furrowed in concentration. Ben had joined Rey in the large stone room where all this junk was piling up, a few machines were scattered about but many had just been torn apart for unknown reasons. 

“Would you like some lights in here?” Natural light managed to seep in from a far window, but barely enough to help see, this place would remain nonfunctional without power, staying just another old ruin. Ben managed to grab a couple bits of tech and sort them, carefully setting them aside before walking a few meters to a stack of imperial supplies crates. He enjoyed watching Rey work, but she would need a lot of help to sort out what was junk and what was actually worth something. The young Solo always prided himself on being resourceful, it made him grin with confidence as he unbuckled the top crate’s latches.

"Considering we might be here a while, it would be appreciated," the young woman replied as she continued to carefully examine each scrap. Having spent pretty much her whole life as a scavenger, it was easy for her to figure out what was useful and what wasn't. "We'll need lights at some point anyway, I don't see a reason not to install them early." Ben, having decided mentally what was needed for their basic survival and comfort in the Massassi temple, got to work figuring out what they had on hand. 

“That’s true, heat would be nice too, considering how cold it can get with a whole bunch of stone around...” His thoughts trailed off as the Imperial crate was opened to reveal standard issue blasters in the first. “We got Imperial tech here.” He closed the crate and set it on the floor to open the next one down. Portable heaters and rations filled it. Lights were no longer in the forefront of his mind. “I take it this is pretty rare these days? I know you used to crawl around in old ships.” Ben was smiling, looking through the different prepackaged meals that only needed water to make work. 

Rey's eyes widened at the sheer amount of rations in the crates. Sure, she received more than what she had lived with for 18 years at the resistance base, but she was barely building up her ability to eat as much as a regular person would need to. As the medic had told her, after that many years of malnutrition, her stomach had shrunk. 

Her jaw dropped, "...woah..." she muttered, letting out a delighted laugh. "I...I don't think I've seen that much food in my entire life." she admitted, dropping the scrap she was holding and moving over closer to him to get a better look. The amount of food and other miscellaneous survival supplies was certainly a surprise considering what he knew of the short lived Imperial occupation of Yavin-4. Rey’s reaction caught him off guard, reminding Ben of just how poorly the galaxy had treated the scavenger girl from Jakku. 

“It’s a lot, but we will have to ration them carefully or we will have to go chasing after General Organa for more food.” He chuckled at the silly thought but his friend, standing beside him brought the meaning of such a lucky find to heart and mind. “When we get a few systems up then we eat lunch. I’ll start with the power and lighting, how does that sound?” He placed his hand on her shoulder again, it was becoming a habit.

"Sounds perfect." The overjoyed scavenger nodded. With newfound excitement and something to look forward to, Rey mindlessly gave Ben a quick kiss on the cheek before going back to her business, not giving the affectionate gesture a second through as her brows furrowed again as she focused. A good few seconds passed before the realization of what she had done dawned on her, cued by the feeling of Ben's eyes on her. Her freckled cheeks flushed a light pink as she attempted to re-focus, acting like nothing had happened. Ben was elated to have her enthusiasm, he was about ready to run off in the direction the power cables on the wall led him when he felt the kiss on his cheek. He’d had done unspeakable things to countless people, but that girl saw through his inky past and foresaw something bright. His fingers went to the spot that radiated warmth, a pin drop could have been heard. The sound of his feet stepping was audible as he turned to Rey, her back facing him. 

“I’ll uh, go get my boots and get to work. Thanks for that.” For being the supposed Supreme Leader, he had a horrible way with women, specifically this woman. Rey cleared her throat at his response and nodded, brushing her hair out of her face. 

"Anytime," she replied with a small smile. "You know, if you want. Or not, that's alright too." she added quickly, her eyes flickering up from the ground over to him as he walked to get his boots. She didn't want to rush or make things uncomfortable for him. She didn't want to make him leave. But the newfound rush of happiness that happened with every touch was getting to be quite addicting. 

Ben stopped mid step rather abruptly, but was able to force himself to keep walking with a large smile on his face. “I’ll be holding you to that offer later.” His shoulders were up and he felt like he had just chugged a liter of caf, today was a good day to be Ben Solo. 

It didn’t take but a couple minutes before Ben was walking back through the room that Rey sorted possibly good scrap in, it was difficult not to watch her work, so he stole a glance. The young woman started beaming at his response, grinning as she went about her work, sorting and starting to place everything by their corresponding parts. When Ben walked back into the room, she looked up at him at the same moment he decided to glance at her. A chuckle slipped past her lips as she grinned up at him, "Hi. Do you need something?" she asked. Ben couldn’t have guessed his look would meet Rey’s, but when it did a patch of pink stained his cheeks. Stopping mid stride he cleared his throat as he failed to hide a smile. 

“No, I’m good. I was just making sure you were alright is all.” He slowly picked up the pace as a small bubble of hope in his mind hoped that she would keep talking, even if he had work to do. The large bundle of cables bracketed to the wall was easy enough to follow to their source, but it was hard not to want to stick by Rey for another half hour. Rey nodded, accepting his reply as she continued to go about her work. She now had enough pieces that were meant for the communications board, so she got up to find a box of tools. 

"Well...thank you." she said as she brushed past him (though she could have avoided doing so if she really wanted to), spotting a dusty toolbox in the corner. "And...if you need anything, or if you aren't alright...let me know." she said, giving his shoulder a gentle squeeze as she brushed past him again, almost like she was testing boundaries ever so cautiously before sitting down to begin putting the parts together. A cold shiver hit Ben as she brushed by him that second time, he had been told something about this before, something about how _‘an accident doesn’t happen twice, kid”._

“Thank you, I appreciate it.” Ben couldn’t remember the last time he spoke the word appreciate, at least not in any sincere form. The large tangle of black cased wires and cables were strung up along the wall, all neatly following each other in the same direction towards the heart of the stone temple. The generator and battery system he found was untouched yet dusty, more cables were thread along the floor and led to the upper floors. Clicking the button didn’t seem to do anything but make it buzz an annoying tone back at him. Ben grumbled a few curses out loud before kicking the durasteel casing that held it all in place. Almost in a stroke of luck that was actually just a coincidence, the battery bank for the solar cells kicked on and lit the base room by room, and floor by floor. Ben was no genius but it worked well enough for him. It was time to see if Rey needed any help.


	23. Burning Stars

Rey was still working on the communications board while Ben went to fix the generator. An overwhelming sense of need flooded her, like she needed to be by his side for a split second, before it all went away. Now more confused than ever, she continued to get to work. It was all quite simple in her mind, connecting the right wires, putting everything in its place. It was like a puzzle. A puzzle....

_ She was back on Jakku in her little hut, curled up in bed with what was supposed to be some sort of doll hugged to her chest. Her hair was still in its iconic three little buns. A look of wonder and amazement in her eyes. She couldn't have been older than four. _

_ "Rey, sweetheart, it's time for bed," A soothing female voice to her as she sat on the edge of the bed, ruffling her hair. _

_ "But I'm not sleepy!" The young Rey pouted, fighting to keep her eyes open. "And papa hasn't told me a story yet." _

_ "Now, now, Rey, have some patience." Her father chuckled as he sat on the edge of the bed as well. In his hand, was what looked like a wooden star. "You see this?" Her father asked, holding the star up. _

_ Rey beamed, nodding eagerly. "It's a star!" she exclaimed. But upon closer inspection, she realized that it was being held together. "But it's broken..." _

_ Her father nodded, "It is. This is a puzzle Rey. One of the most complicated puzzles in the galaxy." he explained, handing it to her. "Would you like to hear the story behind it?" _

_ The curious girl nodded again, "Tell the story, tell the story!" she giggled, to which her father grinned. _

_ "Alright, alright. Well, once upon a time, there was this young prince who wanted to win the heart of the fairest maiden in the land, so he climbed to the top of the tallest tower in the kingdom and he caught a falling star for her. Unfortunately, he was so excited that he dropped it and it smashed into all of these pieces-"  _

_ Rey gasped, her eyes widening, "Oh no!" she exclaimed worriedly, to which her mother laughed. _

_ "Let Papa finish the story, Rey." she said as she picked the child up, setting her down in her lap and hugging her close. _

_ "As I was saying," Rey's father spoke again, "The prince frantically put it back together again to prove his undying love to her and he succeeded." _

_ "He did it!" _

_ "Yes, he did." chuckled her father, "and they lived happily ever after...." _

_ "Good story." Rey complimented with a yawn, handing the puzzle back so she could rub her tired eyes. _

_ Rey's mother kissed the top of her head, "Get some rest." she instructed as she tucked Rey into bed. _

_ And just like that, the young scavenger was out like a light. If only she knew what was to come of her in the following years...if only she knew the affection her parents showed would only dwindle as time passed. _

Ben’s walk back down to his closest friend and ally felt a lot longer than the way up. With the lights on it was easier to navigate the halls and stairways, so that eventually he made it back to the room where Rey was. With the lights on it was easier to tell this large room was more of a warehouse for goods than anything else. Rey was almost frozen in place as she recalled her past. She barely remembered anything about her parents, just that they had traded her for drinking money.

“Need any help?” He spotted her just crouched there by a pile of mechanical chunks and other bits, a couple tools in her hands. “Almost ready for some food?” He looked around and spotted more Imperial crates than Rebellion ones, a sad landmark of the defeat to hold out here.

She only realized the single tear rolling down her cheek when Ben spoke up. Quickly wiping the tear away, she turned her head to look at him with a smile.

"I'm doing alright. Yes, food sounds wonderful." she nodded as she went back to connecting a few wires. A spark ignited for a moment, causing her to flinch, "Kriff!" she exclaimed, now holding her hand close to her chest. She had burned her finger, thanks to her distracted mind. “You alright?” The older of the two tossed aside a ration packet and walked to stand just behind her, his eyes went to the hand she held close. “Need anything for that burn?” The injury looked to be superficial but he couldn’t not offer her help.

"No, no, it'll be alright." Rey assured Ben as she flexed her hand, looking over the burn. It wasn't too bad, her skin was just a bit red. Nothing that would hurt her too badly. "The communications board should be up and running by early tomorrow morning at the latest." she reported as she turned her head to look at him. She stood, coming up to his chin in height. Ben wanted to eat, to relax for five minutes and talk, but he would never try to rush Rey unless absolutely necessary.

“Okay, good.” He watched her smaller hand flex, his own larger hand held her palm as the lost Jedi found his way in the subtle details of this woman. Rey’s hands were unusually soft for somebody that spent more than a decade messing with scrap; small calluses dotted her hands but it was dominated by softer spots. As Ben heard her voice again it pulled him away, he let go and his hands fell to his sides. “That’s great, just as long as that means you don’t overwork or lose sleep.” The loss of warmth made the younger Jedi frown as Ben let go of her hand. Sure, normally, it would still be disappointing, but with the connection they had...their emotions and feelings were so much stronger.

"Thank you, though." she smiled a bit. "For the concern. And while I don't make any promises...I will try and sleep tonight." Rey assured him. "Now...how about lunch?" It was silly to feel this way about someone else, he knew that these feelings were a special part of what they shared. Ben could notice an elevation in his heart rate when Rey was close, the pressure that he wasn’t aware of released a little when she agreed to sleep instead of work the coming night. 

“I would love lunch with you.” Ben wrapped an arm around her back and led the Jedi to their high quality ration stores. “Make a choice, or I can, I don’t mind.” The plain brown vacuum sealed ration bags were labeled in black ink and laid out within the open crate. Rey was beaming by the time they went around back, his arm around her, more food than she'd ever seen in her entire life in front of her. Her hazel eyes darted around, quickly reading the labels on the ration bags. When she read that one bag had dehydrated fruit of all things, her jaw dropped.

"No way..." she said as she picked up the bag, showing it to Ben. "Look!" Ben felt electrified with his proximity to Rey, her wonderful smile and desirably positive attitude was comparable to the birth of a star in beauty. 

“How long has it been since you last had some fruit?” It was genuine curiosity, not judgement or anything else that pushed him to ask as he took the bag. The listed meal was beef and vegetable stew with the fruits and crackers to go with it. “Ready for some dining?” He smiled, feeling silly again while meeting her eyes. She nodded eagerly in response, grabbing the other bag for him. 

"It's been a while...first time I ever had fruit was when I was young. My mum-" Rey paused, her mind going back to her memory of the star puzzle. Of when they were happy. "...for my fourth birthday. My mum got me a few pieces. The next and last time I had it was while in recovery at the med bay after our first meeting." she recalled, clearing her throat as she met his eyes again, her smile returning. "Come on, I want to see if the little scaly creature is still there." It was a nice surprise to hear about Rey’s past and parentage, it had seemed her past was always locked away for nobody else to enjoy. 

“I’m sure it’s still there, let’s go.” Ben, now on her opposite side, took Rey’s hand and led her down the short walk to the overgrown airfield. Once the two met sunlight again, the small lizard was still in the same area, basking in the heat of the sun and the heat of the stone beneath it. “Found your friend.” Once she had found the little critter, Ben got to work setting up the makeshift cooking station. Using water from a canister on his belt, Solo began to cook the soup, keeping a close eye on the dried fruits and crackers that would accompany the meal. It was entertaining to watch Rey interact with the wildlife, her natural gentleness came out like she was a mother or older sister. 

"Hey there," Rey greeted the critter as she sat down in front of the rock, reaching up and running her finger over the reptile's head. The reptile opened its eyes to look up at the young woman, sticking its tongue out at her, like it was hungry. "Aww...you can have some of my fruit, if you'd like." Rey said quietly to the animal. She offered her hand, and the gecko crawled into it and up to Rey's shoulder. "Do you need any help?" Rey asked as she sat by Ben once more. Ben was glancing over as he stirred the soup and prepared the side dishes, none of it was high quality because of its intended purpose of a soldier’s survival. 

“I don’t, it’ll be ready soon. Why not grab yourself a bowl and plate.” Ben pointed at the dishes kit that came with the food. Steam drifted into the air smelling of roasted beef. “We’re not feeding three are we?” He eyed the lizard with a healthy dose of curiosity about it’s reason to stay around people.

Rey shook her head, "He's little, he won't eat much. Besides, I don't think I can physically eat all of this." she shrugged, reaching up and petting the gecko's head. "He can have some of my fruit." she smiled as the gecko licked her cheek. Ben couldn’t help the wide smile that came to his face, regardless of her intentions it was hard not to love everything about this woman. 

“I’m only joking, you know we have plenty of food for the three of us.” The mention of the lizard was fun, like it had been some long time friend or ally that always needed a bit of someone’s meal. Using the force for retrieving the bowls wasn’t lazy, but it felt like it just a bit. The cool morning air and hot soup to accompany the beautiful weather. Rey hesitantly approached Ben as he was making their food, sitting quite close to him and the fire. 

"Sorry....it's a little cold." she said as her excuse. She couldn't help the fact that his presence was addicting. The lizard climbed up her hair and on to her head, looking up at Ben like he was studying him. 

“I forget that what is a comfortable temperature could be quite cold in comparison to the sands of Jakku. The warmth of the dunes still cling to your bones, someday you will overcome it.” He poured a bit of the stew into a bowl for himself, and one for Rey. At his height Ben saw the little creature easily out of the corner of his eye, this one in particular was curious.

"Well, as much as it takes some getting used to, I appreciate the lack of heat stroke." Rey joked, taking her share. The lizard descended from atop Rey's head down to her knee, watching as she took her bowl and sipped on her soup. Ben sat in silence as they ate, he had something painful on his mind that made his heart heavier. 

“What do you think of my mother, Leia?” It was random, but allowed him to alleviate some of the pressure building in his heart. Rey’s words, just her speaking, made some things better. The soup was at least enjoyable, his hunger being satiated. Rey was a little surprised by Ben's question, knowing he rarely voluntarily talked about his mother. But, nonetheless, Rey was going to share her truth. 

"I think she's a brave woman. She's seen more than I think any of us have... she's incredibly strong. I wish I could be more like her." she replied as she stirred her soup with her spoon. "Why do you ask?" Ben was sitting with his legs crossed and the bowl in one hand, he looked to Rey as she spoke so kindly about his mother. 

“She would enjoy hearing that, I failed to be her son so she rarely did. Perhaps.. you could be the daughter she never had.” He smiled, knowing that he was more right than wrong even if it was poking at a deep emotional scar.  _ ’Like the scar she gave you Ben?’ _ his inner voice taunted him with the troubles that faced him near and far. Sitting there in silence was all he could do to control his pulse and emotions. Rey felt a little...awkward when it came to this kind of conversation. If only Ben could realize how much Leia still loved him and wanted him back. If only he knew that it was Kylo Ren that Leia gave up on, and not Ben. 

"You're still her son, Ben." she finally said, glancing over at him. "She still loves you. Don't discredit the progress you've made." Ben sighed, she was right and he was just letting his emotions eat him from the inside out. 

“I’m going to say what I’m thinking,” he took her hand and looked Rey in the eye. “I’ve hurt an entire galaxy, they will want justice somehow. If I’m- if we are not careful the galaxy will take that justice by force.” Ben sighed, content with having let his thoughts out truthfully for once. Rey gently squeezed Ben's hand as he spoke, running her thumb along his knuckles encouragingly. He was right. He had hurt a lot of people, and she didn't blame those who wanted justice. But at the same time, she loved Ben. And she wanted to protect him. 

"Then we'll be careful." she promised as she looked right back at him. "I'm not giving up on you, Ben. Not now, not ever." Ben Solo felt the heat of bottled emotions wash away like a dam had been broken down, Rey did that to him so well it was almost strange. 

“We’ll be careful, but I need to set things right.” He took her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “I don’t know how you do it... So what do you think is next to do before inviting the resistance to thrive here?” Ben would not let her faith in him go to waste, that just wasn’t an option. He had to prove her right or fail completely. A light blush appeared on Rey's cheeks as he kissed her knuckles, warmth comparable to the sands of Jakku flooding her veins. 

"We need to give them any information we can about the First Order." she thought aloud, looking down at their intertwined hands. "And it needs to be as accurate as it can be. Any locations they may be hiding out in, anywhere they may plan on raiding next-" she said, looking up to him again and into his eyes. "Anything we can give them." Ben felt amazing to see Rey beaming like this, so much hope and drive to do good she could probably stare down the First Order into a retreat. 

“That’s great and all, but they would quickly know a spy was in their midst. It would take some planning but if we hit targets at convenient locations or made it all look like blind attacks.. we can win this.” He smiled and reached out with a steady hand to push some of her hair behind an ear. The world was slowing around them in such a private moment, this feeling started when they touched hands, saw the false future of the other. Rey leaned into Ben's touch, closing her eyes for a moment as he tucked her hair behind her ear. Maybe she would wear it down like this more often. 

"See? There is always hope." she said as she opened her eyes again, gazing in to his. For a brief moment, her eyes flickered down to his lips, just like they had in the elevator before they defeated Snoke together. Only this time they knew the bond they shared was more than just a creation of the Force. Ben felt when Rey moved, reacted to his touch. He was smiling at her as his heart thumped heavily in his chest. This wasn’t the right time, but he wanted it nonetheless.

“Do you believe in fate... destiny?” He was also guilty of eyeing her lips. The whole list of mental tasks couldn’t matter less in this pocket of time that belonged to them and no one else.

"I didn't used to." she admitted, albeit a bit breathlessly as her heart pounded in her chest. If only he knew how his smile affected her. "I used to think you were born, worked, then died. But now...no matter which path I went down, I think all of them would have led to you." It was easy enough to hear how her breathing had changed, he even noticed how Rey’s pupils were dilated.

“Is that a good thing? That all your paths lead back to me?” Ben was still smiling, it was always hard around her. No other woman had ever done these things to him, to change how he felt. 

"I would like to think so." Rey replied, reaching up and slowly stroking Ben's cheek with the back of her hand, trying to quickly disguise it by brushing some of his hair back. "Yes. Because I'm rather happy when I'm around you." she confessed as she subtly leaned in closer. The hand on his face felt hot, it would be deceptive to say he didn’t feel the same. It was already decided, he just wasn’t sure when it might happen. As Rey leaned in, he leaned in the other sixty percent of the way to press his lips against hers. 

Ben held her face gingerly in his strong hands. While living with a darker recent past, he was soft and gentle against her lips. Ben’s heart was pounding in his ears as he did what he could only have imagined weeks ago.Rey's heart fluttered as he pressed his lips against hers. She quickly reciprocated, attempting to mimic his movements. Reaching up, one of her delicate hands went up and laced her fingers in his long, dark locks. This sort of relationship was new, but it gave her a hell of a rush. Comfort that she had been craving for so long was finally here. Ben could feel the way Rey touched him, embraced him with her most eager touches and looks. He was feeling a little carried away as his kiss felt hungrier, he wished to be closer but no physical way to do it. Ben had to pull away for air but smiled and almost laughed as his forehead pressed against hers. 

“Goodness Rey.. I love you.” Now he chuckled, his heart fluttering out of control. The softest whine of disappointment had come from Rey's throat when he pulled away, but she was quickly silenced by his smile, by his laugh, by everything about him. Rey grinned at his proclamation of love. This time, there was no rush. There was no dramatic rainfall, it was peaceful. And it all came so naturally. 

"I love you, too." she murmured, closing her eyes for a moment as she rested her forehead against his with a soft smile on her lips. One of his hands fell away, but his right simply moved as he pulled his face away. Ben’s thumb passed over her lips as he held her petite chin. 

“I suppose I could get used to this.” Ben leaned back in, kissing her again with just as much fervor and careful strength as before. He had little idea what he was doing but knew why, it felt so right. It was a little strange but he lightly groaned as he started to run short on air. He loved this woman beyond his wildest dreams and would willingly do anything for her. Rey kissed back eagerly, cupping his cheek with her left hand, her thumb running along his cheekbone. Then he groaned, the sound reverberating against her lips and sending a shiver down her spine. 

"Ben..." she mumbled against his lips before she pulled away for air once more, her hazel eyes gazing up at him in amazement and wonder. Rey’s touch burned him wherever she touched, it left him like smoldering charcoal in the places she left behind to brush something else. Ben pulled away from the kiss and he felt like fragile glass without the scavenger’s direct touch. 

“Yes Rey.. anything.” He was beaming with a large smile as he looked deep into Rey’s golden flecked hazel eyes. Rey's mind was racing, she had no clue what to say or what to do next. What did one do after kissing someone with such passion that was uprooting such emotion and feeling? Her eyes scanned over his face one more time before she stood on her toes, pulling Ben into a tight hug. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent as her mind reeled, but only one thing was clear in the whirlwind. The thought of ‘I just want you to hold me and not let go.’ As the woman from Jakku embraced him, Ben held her tight, a hand rubbing her upper back slowly for comfort. He just stood there in peaceful silence with her, wishing quietly to never have to leave her side. Even after a couple days her hair was still soft and smelled nice. This woman had fallen into his life, and he intended to keep her around for as long a time as possible. Ben’s breathing calmed a little, just an innocent embrace like what they shared did more to help than seemingly anything else. Rey remembered the times before where she'd hug him and he'd freeze. And now, he was actively reciprocating, comforting her and hugging her back. The fact made her smile as she took a deep breath, pressing a light kiss to the side of his neck before turning her head, still resting on his shoulder. 

"Sorry," she apologized quietly for the sudden embrace. Ben had acted without thinking for once, or rather, actually thinking something through and ignoring the little voice in his head that often dissuaded him. What might have once been strange, foreign, and uncomfortable, was now what held Ben to the ground and kept him from drifting away. The kiss to his neck took him out of his head like a slap to the face, it was very intimate to him. His breathing had calmed to slow and deep, relaxed. 

“Don’t apologize, you’ve done nothing wrong Rey.” Ben assured her gently. “We don’t have to signal Ajan Kloss so soon do we?” Ben was feeling a little selfish, he wanted this peaceful part of the universe to himself and Rey for just a bit longer.

"...We can wait a little while." Rey finally said after a beat. "We can wait until we've fixed everything up...cleared the ground a bit more so it's easier for the droids to get around." she reasoned, giving him one more squeeze before pulling away. "Is there any particular reason you want to wait longer?" the young woman asked him. If he was nervous about facing the Rebellion again, perhaps she could help ease his worries. Ben’s passive smile that had formed during their hug crept back up again, he was actually feeling kinda happy. 

“Yeah, there are a lot of roots and rocks that would stump even the sturdiest of BB units.” The reasoning she provided was a bit more than a small excuse, but it was one that was full of truth and was after all worth it. “My fear of justice is not greater than my love for you. I might have to leave soon or the First Order might consider their leader a deserter, but..” He remained hopeful, knowing Rey would understand his reasoning for having to play both sides. “I won’t miss a chance to be back here by your side. Maybe I can smuggle a few worker droids to help you for the days where I’m away?”

"I understand." Rey assured him, knowing of his responsibilities within the First Order. She trusted him at this point to stay faithful to the Resistance, though, they'd experienced too much together for him to throw it all away. Though, regardless of her trust in him, there would always be that still small voice in the back of her head, afraid of being abandoned again. "And I would appreciate having some worker droids... I could use the company." she hummed, reaching up and brushing his hair back. "Promise me you'll try to stay safe?" Rey’s understanding of his impossible mission was the only way for his plan to work, but she currently looked a bit concerned and Ben had to remedy that. 

“One can go crazy without interaction of some kind. I..” There was that concern of hers, now out in the open. “I promise, our enemies won’t expect a thing.” Ben looked away to the trees, then back again into her beautiful eyes; it was easy to get trapped in them. “I also promise I will come back at least once a cycle, nobody else there knows why a force user might have to go reconnect to their ancestors or something.” He was smiling as he made up the see through excuse on the spot.

Rey chuckled a bit at his excuse, "A retreat of sorts." she reasoned, stretching a bit before she pressed one more quick kiss to his lips, "C'mon, let's finish lunch and then we can get back to work." she said as she sat down again, grabbing her bowl and sipping on her soup. The kiss sent a bit of a shockwave through Ben’s body, it disrupted his breathing for about as long as the kiss itself lasted. 

“Alright, we should probably eat what we can, while we can.” Ben put a hand on Rey’s shoulder, squeezed it once, then took his own seat right after she did. He couldn’t help but look at Rey as he sipped a bit more on the broth and veggies. 

Thankfully there wasn’t much more than a few spoonfuls left in the pot, the two of them had poured so much in their bowls on the first go. “So..” Ben spoke between bites with another ready on his spoon. “If you finish rebuilding that communications board I could set up an encryption route back to the Resistance. In the meantime I have to go through the stores to find proper sleeping arrangements.” Rey happily sipped on her broth, eating the small berries that came labeled as fruit, even feeding one to the gecko that was still hanging out and crawling around. She felt Ben's eyes on her, and she couldn't help but smirk a bit, her eyes flickering back over to him.

"I can work with that," she said in response to his plan, sipping the last of her broth. "Depending on the weather as well, I'll start looking for a stream or lake for us until we can get the irrigation systems up and running again." 

Ben saw that he’d been caught gazing, it was rather hard after all not to look at someone so beautiful and then look away. Her last sentence piqued his interest, Ben hadn’t even thought of bathing yet but it would definitely become an issue sooner rather than later. “Completing such a task would do us a lot of service around here in the coming days. So, do you think there’s anything I should handle of equal importance?” 

Rey thought for a moment, trying to think of something Ben could do to help. "If you could figure out how to get some electricity working here, that would be a big help." She thought aloud as she finished her lunch. "It will be a bit easier, considering there are probably leftover installments from the empire....and they're easily enough to rewire if need be." Ben sat in thoughtful silence, looking at Rey while she spoke as a sign that he was listening, even if there were other reasons he enjoyed her beauty. 

“I started a solar generator that is linked to the dishes on top of the temple, but if the power is only making it halfway, there is definitely something Imperial stealing it away.” Ben had a confident smile, he knew that no matter what he could handle any bulk of Imperial tech. He took the moment to look over at their ships, once the two old craft would have shot each other down in combat, but now they sat as monuments to a war that never truly ended. Rey nodding in understanding. 

"Alright, sounds like a plan." she smiled over at him, then catching where he was looking. The two ships. They looked odd, standing peacefully next to the other. Not firing or broken down, both standing strong. Much like Ben and Rey. "I'll meet you back here at sundown for dinner?" Rey suggested as she started to assist in putting out the campfire. 

Ben considered what Rey had said, “That sounds a little lonely, but maybe I’m lucky enough to pass you by before then.” The dregs of the soup were poured into Ben’s bowl and while already full, he drank the rest down. With silence between them, a small worry grew in his heart. “You have both that old blaster and a lightsaber right? I hear some of the wildlife isn’t as friendly as your little lizard friend.” Rey chuckled a bit upon hearing the concern in Ben's voice, rolling her eyes a bit. She was perfectly capable of defending herself, even without the blaster and saber.

"Yes, Ben, I have the blaster and saber. I'll be alright." she assured him as her little lizard friend found its way into her pocket, barely peeking out. "And you have your saber as well?" Ben Solo hadn’t spent more than a day with his mother recently, and her worry for others had already bled back into him. It was a bit comical but he let Rey just shrug off the concern as he knew full well how capable she was, her shenanigans on Starkiller base was evidence enough. 

“Yes, I do..” The metal cross hilt weighed heavy on his belt, he was feeling increasingly wary of wielding the weapon that had done such evil.

"Then I think we'll be alright." Rey shrugged, giving Ben one more kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you later. Feel free to stop by if you need anything." She offered, giving his shoulder a gentle squeeze before heading back to the temple to put together the rest of the communications board, her lizard friend riding along in her pocket. Ben would savor that cheek kiss for the next few hours, that much was guaranteed for the day. Rey’s touch was warming like the sun, but all for the heart and soul. 

“I’m sure something will come up that requires your expertise.” He smiled and because of his longer stride, passed Rey while walking towards the stairwell that wound around the core of the cone shaped temple.


	24. Incriminating Evidence

Rey went ahead and went back into the temple, finding where she'd been working earlier. The communications board was coming along smoothly- or, as smoothly as it could without having another person or a droid to assist her. But that was alright with Rey. Fixing the board gave her time for her mind to go blank, for her to relax and solely focus on the task at hand. She may have received a few scrapes and burns on her hands in the process, but it wasn't anything majorly distracting.

It wasn’t a long trip up the stairs for Ben to the battery box that held the energy, the trouble was how it wasn’t bringing power to the lower levels. The systems were all working fine and the hardware was in decent shape for it’s age. After a short few minutes of searching empty floors that led to nothing but dust, scrap, or vines, there was a breakthrough in the search. Solo’s scarlet blade ignited as powerful blaster bolts rang out towards him, the sound echoing off the stone walls. Bolt after bolt came flying from the station’s defense turret but had been redirected onto the floor where it blacked spots of ancient stone. What had just looked like an Imperial transmitter terminal actually also held and had charged two Viper probe droids. 

Rey snapped out of her focus upon hearing the blast, jumping in surprise. "Kriff..." she breathed a sigh of relief. She stood, dusting herself off as she ventured towards the sound of the blast, her hand on her blaster holster as she did so, just in case.

"Ben?" she called out as she climbed the staircases, unable to help but look over her shoulder every few seconds. She attempted to reach out using the Force, but she seemed to be too distracted.

Ben slashed through the air and absorbed another bolt into the angry red blade. He was already sweating from the stress of going from calm and actually bored to combat and survival. He heard her voice from the stairs, faint but there. Help would arrive soon if he could hold off the brutal attack from quickly moving droids that avoided even the quickest of redirects.   
  
Once Rey reached where Ben was, she was able to see the attack being set upon him. She remained quiet, knowing that while the droids were focused on Ben, they could still hear. She quietly withdrew her blaster, trying to aim it at the droids without hitting Ben. Once she got a clear shot, she pulled the trigger, hoping it would help. 

Ben could see her creeping up in his peripherals, but kept up the hardened defense or else he would be struck by a deadly bolt of fire. As Rey peeked out and took the shot, the droid was hit in the side and a large chunk of its mass was blasted away. In a frenzied last stand the damaged droid fired wildly and blasted away stone from right beside Rey’s head. Rey ducked as the damaged droid fired frantically around. She leapt around the corner, narrowly missing the piece of stone that would've most definitely at least injured her.   
  
With one droid left, Ben charged it with a battle cry and sliced it in two with a bit of effort. The room fell silent with only a small interruption of Solo’s heavy breathing and the sparking of destroyed robotics failing to function. Pure adrenaline ran through Rey’s veins, her chest rising and falling as she tried to take slow, deep breaths to keep from getting too panicked. When she heard nothing but sparking, she peaked around the corner to see the last droid in pieces. 

"Are you alright?" she called over to Ben, sprinting over to him. Ben’s chest was rising and falling rapidly, the sudden excitement and danger had adrenaline burning through his veins. 

“Uh, y-yes I think I’m alright.” The lightsaber in Ben’s hand collapsed back into the hilt and he dropped it to the ground carelessly. “Do I look hit to you?” He was looking all over himself for any signs of bodily harm, but found nothing more than a bruise or scratch. Rey’s eyes scanned over Ben's form, making sure he wasn't too badly hurt or bleeding. Thankfully, only a few bruises had been left behind. 

"I was just checking." Rey replied, looking over him one more time to be absolutely sure. 

“I know you’re in the middle of something right now, but how hard do you think it would be to bypass this operational recon station?” Now Ben brought his saber through the force to his hand where he clipped it back on his belt.

Rey couldn’t help but smirk, “"Depends on who you're asking." she replied, crossing her arms. "But, I think I could, yes."

“Okay, that’s good.” He smiled and chuckled just a bit but he wasn’t entirely sure why. Rey’s quip was cute and funny for sure, but he still gave her a half serious glare like he could see right through her. “What a relief, although I suppose my lightsaber would have sped up the solo process even at the cost of efficiency.”

Rey chuckled, rolling her eyes a bit as she smiled. "Good thing you've got me, then." she teased as she went to bypass the operational recon station. Though her hands hurt quite a bit from being burned, a few cuts on her fingertips, she was used to it, determined to get her work done. Besides, she had a bit of backup bacta in her ship anyway. Ben walked over to the station, but stopped halfway to inspect the busted droid, the cold circuits had been waiting for someone to interfere, he wondered how much had been recorded, even more how much had been sent off somewhere to be listened to. 

“Having you makes me one of the luckiest people in the galaxy.” He was smiling as he stepped over the droid and went to Rey’s side to help her. Rey couldn't help but blush a bit at Ben's compliment. She was joking when she had said it was a good thing he had her...but she certainly didn't mind the sweet words. 

"Thank you." she said softly as she started to examine the recon station. 

“So how do we dismantle this? Or better yet do you think it could be used to our advantage?” 

The last couple hours of conversation had been recorded and transmitted into space, the old Imperial station had been manned to hold the sector from pirates so few knew of it’s old purpose; in the data banks aboard the station sat incriminating evidence that the supreme leader had turned.

"I think we may be able to use it for better security." Rey commented. "Though we would have to build a better generator for it, and I'd have to do some re-wiring, but it could be done. What do you think?" Rey asked Ben, completely oblivious to the fact that they were being spied at in that very moment. She hadn't even thought it was possible, considering the Empire had abandoned the planet all those years ago. The computer board sat whirring and beeping as it continued work autonomously, this slightly concerned him. 

“Yes, I think it’s quite possible, but..” Ben raked a hand through his hair as he looked over the tech older than himself. “There’s something else going on with this machine, I feel a disturbance in the force and it worries me.” He was scowling, his arms crossed over his chest as he thought and looked from the droids to the tech and back to Rey. “Why would they lay a trip wire here to activate it’s security if it were just a communications post?”

Rey's brows furrowed a bit, "Still active? I thought it was just a couple droids malfunctioning." she said in confusion. "You don't think it could be the First Order....right?" she asked, feeling like her heart had dropped into her stomach, her blood running cold in her veins.

He tensed up, Ben never wanted to worry Rey and now he’d gone and done just that. “If this thing is still on, it’s owned by the First Order now.” He paced back and forth trying to make sense of things. “This station hasn’t done anything about us until I disturbed it which either means they don’t know it’s still transmitting, or they’re spying on us.” He lifted himself up to sit atop the metal terminal, a place to think. “What do you think we should do about this?”

"You're in more danger than I am, then." Rey said seriously as she sat down on the ground, placing her hands in her lap as she tried to think. "We'll need to relocate- you will, at least. If I could sneak you into the Resistance Base- but I'm sure you'd rather not." She sighed as she thought aloud. She had already lost so much in life, she wasn't about to lose Ben. Ben crossed the room in an easy couple strides, he was on one knee and in front of the confused and probably frustrated scavenger. 

“I’m not going anywhere.. at least not permanently.” He took the time to mimic how Rey sat across from her, and looked around the room as he thought of a solution. “I could find where these recordings are sent, as long as nobody has seen them yet..” Ben made eye contact. “I don’t see any other way out of this other than a fools crusade, or guarantee the loss of our only advantage over the First Order.” There was hope in his dark eyes, not unlike that moment aboard the Supremacy when he asked her to join him.

"Do what you can, then." Rey sighed, resting her elbows on her knees, holding her head in her hands as she tried to think of some way to fix all of this. She didn't want to abandon Ben, or the Resistance. Why couldn't this one place be their safe haven without any complications? Ben crossed the room to stand in front of her, but he crouched to be more on Rey’s level. Ben placed a hand on her shoulder and tried to look her in the eye. 

“I need to ask something difficult of you.” He thought for a moment, took a breath, than spoke. “Come with me and we can make sure nobody will ever know about this place or our activity here. Jumping across the galaxy alone is well… lonely.” Rey looked up to look into Ben's eyes, processing his offer. Her brows furrowed slightly though at his choice of wording. Would this be forever?

"Okay...of course, I wouldn't leave you to go alone. But for how long?" she asked cautiously. Her expression was rather telling, but Ben didn’t comment on the look he received. 

“With the distance and possible length we may need to go too-“ He cut himself off, he had to be careful of his next words or face the fact of going alone. “A month at the most, then you may return here to continue the work.” Ben didn’t have the stomach to tell Rey he couldn’t stick around forever, but if asked he would have to tell the truth.

Rey nodded slowly, weighing her options. "I'll need to contact General Organa, just so she knows I'm safe...that you're safe." she added, placing her hand on top of his that rested on her shoulder. "I'll get back to work on that communications board, and as soon as I have it up and running, I'll let her know." Ben nodded at first, thinking about what she had said.

“Yes, that’s good. Contact General Organa but you can’t mention me or this place by name, we have to be careful.” He stood up and reached out his hand to help Rey off the floor. “I need to prepare my things for travel, but I won’t leave without a goodbye.” The fallen Jedi looked over at the broken droids, then back at Rey. 

Rey took Ben's hand as she nodded in agreement. "Alright. Sounds like a plan." she said, a soft sigh escaping her lips. Once she had gotten up off the ground, she let go of Ben's hand to stand on her toes and wrap her arms around his neck, hugging him close. "I'm sorry...about all of this." she said quietly.   
  
She was so disappointed. She thought they'd finally found a safe haven, but that could never be the case. The only peace she could ever find was with Ben, in those brief moments he held her. It felt nice to be on the same page with someone, to be close to someone like her. The hug came as a surprise, and Ben wouldn’t lie that he found the act of Rey having to stand on her tippy toes just to give him a proper hug. Solo leaned down a bit so the Scavenger’s feet were on solid ground, he held her close but gingerly like a precious vase, only this vase could easily kick his ass again. 

“No, don’t apologize.. It’s not your fault it’s mine.” His hand was at the middle of her back, trying to rub soothing circles in an effort to make the situation a fragment better. “We’ll do this together, just as we’ve done so many other things.” Ben pulled himself away so they were looking into each other’s eyes, he still held the weight of darkness in his heart and that bled into his solemn gaze. Rey reached up, stroking Ben's cheek with the back of her calloused hand. His eyes were his most heartbreaking feature, but she couldn't stop herself from getting lost in them. 

"Okay." she uttered quietly, closing her eyes and placing a soft, but brief kiss to Ben's lips. "I should go and fix the communications board. I shouldn't be long." Rey was so gentle with him, it barely made sense that any human being, especially her, could find a light within the darkness of his soul. A smile grew on Ben’s lips after the kiss and he nodded before he managed to speak up. 

“Okay, I will be nearby if you need me. Full power should be returned to this place before we leave.” He couldn’t help the desire to kiss her back so he too left a quick and gentle kiss on Rey’s lips before walking away to deal with the power systems. Having something to physically work on was a nice distraction from his thoughts of Rey. Thinking of her wasn’t entirely a bad thing, but Ben had a harder time focusing when thoughts of her surrounded him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh oh! Looks like there are some new issues arising. Let us know what you think! We love hearing from you guys!


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